To ask why people think it’s okay to abuse NHS staff?

[notafanofthisanymore]

I’m NHS admin. I just got a call through to me and I was the wrong person to help, but as it was a simple query (think where to go as opposed to anything medical), I tried to help the patient.

I understand that having health issues is stressful. But I’ve just been called a useless thick bitch and told that my job is the reason the NHS is sinking, because I told this patient something they didn’t like. I was then told that if this patient died on the way to their appointment it would be blood on my hands, and I should hope they don’t.

I’m just baffled. I was polite, answered this person’s question and got abused because they didn’t like the answer (having to go somewhere else for something they needed). In what world is this acceptable?

I now work for myself in private medical practise because the number of people who were referred to the NHS who never did anything drove me to start a business.
Everyone is super polite and kind and nice, they all want to be my best friend, because I am the key to them not having to go back through the absolute hell of dealing with the NHS. The system is broken and failing and it’s not people’s fault.

Two words. Emotional dysregulation.

More and more people are increasingly unable to control their emotional response and independently regulate themselves in times of stress, frustration or discomfort. We are, as a society, quite poor at teaching our children the skills of self regulation.

People dealing with the NHS are often enduring a period of stress or frustration. They’re triggered. Self regulation goes out the window.

Crikey.
When I compare the fabulous service I get from my vet with the NHS, it's like comparing night and day. When our old boy died suddenly all the staff sent a lovely condolence card. When my dad dropped dead the GP surgery didn't so much as acknowledge it.

I am appalled at what you have posted. 😮

Are these violent, aggressive, coke-heads actually allowed to own animals ?

Is this a well-known chain of Vets we are talking about ?

I think what has happened is that for some people the NHS is free of charge. They really pay very little to supoort it.

The people are working for them (even though the people shouting their mouths off are being subsided by others!).

This has resulted in the NHS turning in on themselves. The service is run for them i.e GP telephone appointments. Its much easier for a GP to just have a list of phone numbers to call regardless of what time your appointment was. I was told I had a 1000 appointment and was called at 1245. My role can enable me to take this nonsense. Other roles, teachers, supermarket workers, people who had to attend meetings are not so lucky.

Another example is trying to get as many people as possible into one big hospital. Much easier for the NHS. Issue is that my nearest hospital is 50 mins drive away. The parking is truly shite and your appointment card tells you to leave 1 HOUR to find a car parking space.

I fully grasp the complexity of medicine and don't expect instant solutions or answers. But it has shocked me during my inpatient stay to be treated like an object they extract information from with no feedback or explanation.
I spent my hospital stay reading a book about black holes so I was fully alert and capable of digesting any information relayed to me but no one was telling me information or giving me a chance to ask questions. Thankfully I gleaned enough from my own knowledge/googling to work out a fair amount of what was going on. This meant I was able to do a Martha's Rule escalation when the weekend staff weren't administering the meds or doing the tests they were meant to have been doing every 4 hours.

Knowledge, even caveated and conditional, helps us take care of ourselves and helps us advocate for ourselves.

Me speaking up has saved the NHS having me as an inpatient for several more days at best /having a costly deterioration on their hands

I agree with this. It’s what passes for feeling ‘alive’. Rather than empathy, compassion and deeper thinking. But it’s their ‘right’ [entitlement] to feel like this and expect everyone support it.

I had a blood yest this morning and while I was in the waiting room (about ten mins) the receptuonists had about half a dozen interractions and every one was about how to use the NHS app or glitches with it. Perhaps humans need to come back front and centre.

Also the telephone apts. I have a professional job. A three hour window doesn't work so I wait for a F2F apt for the GP to say "oh this could have been done on the phone" and then to look gobsmacked when I say "yes but a f2f takes 45 mins out of my diary, for a phone apt, I have to block three hours. That doesn't work for me because my time is important too".

I really wish people who work in the NHS would begin to understand that not all of the public has nothing better to do. Perhaps Andy Burnham may get someone to calculate the impact of lost working time on GDP.

No this is all over. I locummed for a few years. Deprived areas are worse. Some practices just stank of weed all day long. Lots of neglected pets unfortunately, a fair few end up being reported to the RSPCA. I've seen some horrific cases.
Not every pet has a caring owner unfortunately.

Why do the surgeries think this is acceptable. They give you a time and then dont bother keeping to it. I agree that some people cannot be bothered to use an online form. They dont trust it. I had reason a few weeks ago to use it and it did work very quickly. They did clearly have someone on it and hopefully all day (not something they look at when the staff have time!)

Quite appalling behaviour. It is never ok to abuse anyone, let alone our wonderful NHS staff.
I’m so sorry this happened to you and this person does not deserve his free healthcare. They should take that off repeat offenders, that would soon teach them!

Healthcare is largely seen as "women's work" and as such is considered low status, thus some people feel justified in treating workers in abusive ways. It isn't the same as other industries as had been said by pps. No one is punching a builder if they don't immediately get what they feel they need. They save that for nurses and healthcare workers.

You do sound unreasonable.
Maybe your appointment was pushed back because there were more urgent cases? Maybe the GP had a sick child or was ill themselves that morning .
My OH had an urgent biopsy appointment and had to cancel his morning clinic and yes he got flack from his rebooked patients. He’s a human being for goodness sake.

You still got care, again I go back to the 5 star service attitude.
It’s also not possible to have a hospital within a 5 mile radius for everyone.

Yes, who else's fault would it be?

Every professional makes mistakes of course, but it's usually more forgiveable if the original advice isn't delivered in an arrogant way.

I don't think they sound unreasonable.

If appointments are late running, an apology and explanation are required. That's basic good manners.

It's understandable if a Dr has to cancel a clinic due to their own meducal emergency but it doesn't mean there shouldn't be an apology. If I have an NHS apt, the letter contains a stern warning about being taken off the list if an appointment is missed and how much a missed apt costs the NHS. However the same level of concern does not work in reverse. That's where the NHS gets it so badly wrong.

I’m currently on my third call to try and find out about an appointment that has been arranged for my son. I got a text this morning reminding me about it and instructing me to call the number on the letter. I don’t have a letter, so round and round all the different departments I go.

I have nothing planned today, and there is nothing serious going on with my son, so this is nothing more than a mild annoyance and I’ve been nothing but polite to everyone I have spoken to.

I can understand why the situation I am in today could easily upset someone who is calling about their child with cancer, for example, and how being passed around departments, with no one able to answer a simple question, could push them to their limit.

I also understand that some people are arseholes and that this is something that anyone in a public facing role has to deal with - which doesn’t make it okay, it’s just not NHS specific.

I will, however, never forget the way I was treated and spoken to on the post natal ward following the birth of each of my children, or the way I was spoken to over the telephone when I had to call the maternity ward following my discharge due to a suspected DVT. I can well understand how treating people, when they are at their most vulnerable, as nothing more than an absolute pain in your arse and as a serial nuisance, both in person and over the telephone, can result in people lashing out.

This. A lot of the general public suck. You should see how people can throw a paddy over the temperature of a sausage roll.

And when other professionals cancel you at short notice, they make a real attempt to "fit you in" as soon as possible thereafter. Whereas with the NHS, you're just put back in the queue at the mercy of the appointments clerk to give you a new appointment several weeks or months away, regardless of the urgency or how long you've already waited.

You are not ‘entitled’ to an explanation about medical staff’s health issues or any other personal matter. And why should they apologise? Do you apologise for being ill?
I’m stepping away from this thread in disgust so don’t bother responding.

Because it is polite to apologise for changing appointments, causing a patient to rearrange their commitments, cancel or rebook annual leave, etc. And yes, I book a half day for a 9.30/10am appointment, because I get too stressed otherwise about being late back, when I am kept waiting for 90 minutes

I am sorry if you think that's entitled and you must step away from the thread but I think you are badly in the wrong here.

Cheerio.

Say well we cant scan you then

Some people think it’s ok to abuse any staff. It’s not, obviously. Notjing special about the NHS though. 🤷‍♀️

I have never abused staff of any employer.

But we are animals with a pain and fear response. The four times I've been to a&e recently (for myself, and my toddler with breathing difficulties), I've been treated with rudeness and indifference by various staff.

And I was being polite and helpful as a patient. One woman misheard the surname I gave, couldn't find my son's record, then told me "it would have helped if I had said that in the first place" when I politely corrected her. Is that any way to treat a parent worried out of their mind about their sick child at 3am, when it was your mistake in the first place?

By the end of a six hour wait to be seen myself, I'd sat with nurses bitching about their colleagues, I'd been ignored when I collapsed to the floor in pain, and that was on top of the existing pain and sickness I was feeling.

That's before you get to the shit show of pregnancy, when my consultant bitched to me about the poor nurse, complaining that she "just wanted to go home".

Not everybody was like that - paramedics have always been kind in my experience. I had a laugh with a few of the nurses.

But even if you're good staff, patients generally have to wade through an army of wankers to get to you. It sucks, but that's because the NHS sucks.

we can’t . But had to put up with threats of complaints and being told I’d have ro pay for re piercing and it was stupid and I was being mean because she’s ’alternative ‘. I’m honestly a nice polite person and in 40 years of health service never had a complaint but people can be really personally abusive .

You’re not entitled to someone else’s private medical information. If the appointment gets moved it’s moved, why do you need to abuse people for that?