DP and I have just had second child, DS just turned 3, DD 7 weeks. We are constantly bickering over little things but it all stems from me losing faith in him doing what he says he's going to do, because there have been multiple occasions where he hasn't.
The biggest one - on multiple occasions (at least 10 times in the past 7 weeks), DP has failed to get up in the morning with our DS. We are sleeping in separate rooms as I am breastfeeding and co sleeping with the baby, so it is DP's job to have DS on the monitor (on his phone) and get up with him in the morning. It is always for a different reason, e.g. his phone charger fell out, he forgot to turn the volume up, he forgot to put the app on. 1 or 2 times is excusable, but more than that and I feel that it shows he doesn't care or can't be bothered to ensure that he's going to be able to hear DS. Now every time it happens (3 times in the last week!), I get really angry really quickly because I'm just like, how can you not care enough to make it work?!
Not sticking to the morning routine that we'd agreed. Obviously stuff is up in the air when the baby is newborn but after a few weeks I said I'd like a bit more routine for DS, e.g. eating breakfast at the table, getting dressed, playing, otherwise he was just watching TV for over an hour and eating cereal on the sofa in the mornings We discussed and agreed on a morning routine multiple times and it got done maybe once or twice before DP just didn't do it any more and I had to remind him or have a big blow up about it and we'd have the same conversation again.
Not checking things in fridge before he gives them to him, e.g. he put a yoghurt past its sell by date in his nursery lunchbox, fruit that was clearly off.
All these things and others that I can't even think of right now have massively shaken my trust in him. It makes me feel like he doesn't think things through and is happy to just wait for things to go wrong, and I see that as a lack of care and it really upsets me. Now I am on high alert so feel like I am constantly nagging or picking up on things.
Other little examples - watching too much TV - we've agreed on half an hour in the morning and up to an hour in the evening, but I have 0 faith that if I didn't go in in the morning and ask how much TV he'd had that DP would turn it off after half an hour.
DP put the pram in the car the other day so it fell out when the boot opened. Not the worst thing in the world but it was just yet another example of him not thinking things through. He's always sorry but for me there's no point being sorry if he's not realising that the problem is not the individual things themselves, but the lack of thinking through the consequences or caring.
AIBU to be annoyed and losing faith in him, and getting annoyed really quickly now when he does any tiny thing 'wrong'?