Bedtimes on holiday??

[Thechaseison71]

Taken from a comment on another thread.

Do people really stay so obsessed about bedtimes that when they are on holiday the fo nothing all evening except sit in a hotel with a sleeping child?

And miss going out for dinner ( many restaurants open later abroad) or even hotel entertainment

From a personal perspective had mine as toddlers asleep in a buggy and carried on with the holiday. What's the point of actually going if you restrict yourself so much?

YABU. - bedtime routine is so important

Yanbu. Like to have a bit of freedom in holiday

Generally it depends on the child

Depends on the child, I think. If they would happily sleep in a buggy then transfer to bed without waking then go for it, but if they would be likely to wake and have a restless night making the next day a pain with tired and grumpy DC then I can see how sticking to the routine works better.

I've read this a lot on here and it baffles me .... sitting in the dark in a hotel bedroom .. or one time a couple sat in the bathroom playing cards!

I used to be fairly rigid with bedtime at home but holidays and special occasions are very different and ours used to come out very late with us.

I'll just never get over English people putting their kids to bed so early.
Like 7 o' clock....that's afternoon to us 😅
And then they wake up at silly o'clock in the morning.

So yes, I agree putting your children to bed super early on holiday is very unreasonable.
( Excepting health reasons obviously)

I think it depends on the child/family as to what will work best.

I wouldn't book a single room hotel situation though. If I had one that needed to be in bed of an evening I'd go for a setup that allowed us to at least sit on a balcony/in another room in comfort (with the light on!).

You clearly did not have the kind of child who would not sleep in buggy and would scream the whole evening and most of the next day.

On a hot holiday - afternoon siesta and then stay up late. No point in being on holiday and living the same routine!

We’ve never been rigid with bedtimes and on holiday we are very loose, but we also wouldn’t ever book somewhere where we are all in one room in the first place. We like to spend time together after kids are asleep, have sex, etc. so we always go for places that have separate rooms.

We just came back from an AI holiday where we had a bungalow and that was perfect. 4 and 7yo went to sleep about 9/9:30 on evenings we didn’t go out, and DH and I had a few hours to play games, chat, etc in the living room/on the patio and then our own bedroom too. And meant they didn’t get up till 8am most days too.

I think if you’re all in one room though that it would actually be easier just to all stay up late together out and about and then go to bed at same time and get up later in morning rather than sitting in silence in a hotel room all evening.

Some kids really need routine and all hell breaks loose if there’s any remote divergence. That said, I think it’s probably quite rare and linked to SEN. My youngest has autism but he’s fine staying up late on holiday or for example when the football was on the other night, when it’s Christmas or NYE.

Dc no’s 1, 2 and 4 - could sleep anywhere, cope with flexibility and were no problem. DC no 3 would not sleep in a buggy. Would scream blue murder. Could not be out of routine. Depends on the child.

I think it depends on the child. We always take advantage of the time difference and that means ours staying up later anyway, and we let her have a longer nap so she can stay up til 9/10pm-ish. We would also always book somewhere with a balcony or second bedroom so we can read/play games after she's in bed.

Hmm all those saying about putting kids to be and spending time with your partner. But what if you are a single parent. ? Unlikely to be about to book anywhere with seperate rooms unless you have loads of money, and in a hotel it wouldn't be allowed. And to be sat there with no entertainment with a sleeping kid isn't much of a holiday

I suppose fair enough for all those whose kids " can't cope" with a change of routine but I'm sure some people don't even try. Probably the same lot who run back home in middle of day so baby can nap ( although tbh only ever heard of that on here never in real life)

We didn’t do abroad holidays when ours were very young. But if they were unable to cope without a strict routine we wouldn’t have gone. It’s not my idea of a holiday to be trapped in a hotel room in silence at 7pm

How do you know whether they cope or not until you try it?

Ours just got popped in the buggy at that age.

we were never slaves to routine

I think you need to consider how long there is between your return from holiday and when your DC resume school.

When I took the kids away on my own I’d book a two room apartment/hotel room so they could sleep. It really wasn’t much more expensive with a free child place and meant we all had a bit of space. I was never a slave to routine though so we would do the entertainment, sit at a bar and play card games with them etc. I don’t know anyone whose routine doesn’t go out the window on holiday

I'm a single parent. DS's holiday bed time depends on what we're doing the next day. Up early to go somewhere means he goes to bed earlier. Pool day, he stays up later.

I thoroughly enjoy the time he's in bed. Generally sitting on the terrace reading, smoking the odd holiday treat cigarette, listening to the waves and cicadas. Which I dont get to do by the pool. Busy days and chilled nights is not the waste of a holiday that you are suggesting it is.

Miniblondes has always loved her sleep Thankfully, so even on holiday and a baby toddler, she would sleep quite happily in the buggy

But this is probably because during summer holidays and days out she slept in the buggy so used to it

Obviously, as gets older. She stays up to 9 /10 o’clock and then sleeping in the next morning.

Now at nine if there , we normally go out for food drink entertainment at home by 10/11 but as we go for nearly 2 weeks would normally in the middle of each week have an early 7 o’clock night session and catch up on some sleep

but that’s 1/2 Nights out of a fortnight we’ll be in

And this is yes as a single parent for the night in so watch TV read a book sit on the balcony play games on my phone whatever

We largely stick to routines on holiday because we all have a much more pleasant time. It isn't worth it for us to force them up past their bedtimes and have to deal with grumpy toddlers who won't settle in a buggy and just want to go to bed for a proper sleep.

We just make sure not to stay in places where the setup means we'd be stuck in one room in the dark. With careful research, it still means we can have a nice holiday.

Well, more by how they cope when routines have to be broken at home.
I am fortunate that both of mine fit in. We had a late night last week as the older had his end of term show. Youngest had to tag along. No strops or bad behaviour the next day though.

Personally I like a bit more freedom on holiday but I know every child and family is different.

Mine were never “go to bed early/ sleep begets sleep etc” children. They slept more at night if they slept less in the day (and vice versa) and would always roughly do the same number of hours over all - so lie in a bit if up late, minus time taken napping the previous day.

That depends on what you want to do on holiday. If I am at a hotel resort place it means I've already compromised due to kids. And I'm far more of an evening/ night person so being stuck in hotel all evening would do me in.

I don't sit by a pool either

Your post is very judgey.

some people like a routine! Doesn’t make it less of a holiday. What’s a holiday to you may be different from others.

we’ve done a mixture and find too many late nights just creates very grumpy kids! Mine not keen on loud entertainment either. Just not our thing. But have stayed up later for meals etc.

For us as well I need a break from the kids. I don’t want them up late every night with me. I need some quiet adult time.

we can’t afford more than one room in AI type places. But happy to sit with some drinks on the balcony.

putting “can’t cope” in speech marks feels like you don’t believe they can’t cope? Many children find routine changes, late nights etc hard. For those who don’t then great.

one of mine would sleep in buggy. One would in short bursts but would wake up crying and then couldn’t transfer to bed - would be awake for hours!!!! That’s no holiday for me I’m afraid.

No entertainment?

Most hotels have internet and television.
I am not single but I have often sat at the balcony at the hotel with a book or knitting relaxing with a sleeping child and DH has been out with a friend. No big thing really.

But yes, things are easier now the youngst attending secondary school. Of vourse.