To ask HOW do people find the time to do things when they work full time?

[latesummerearlyautumn2]

I work full time, majority from home, and just about manage to keep on top of housework, life/home maintenance on top of that.

I walk every lunch break and after work to do 10k steps a day, but after that I have dinner, shower, may call a relative for a quick chat, and then before I know it, it’s time for bed.

Weekends are usually spent doing essential things like food shopping, laundry, house and garden stuff.

I don’t even have kids and marvel at people who have the time to maintain good social lives in particular. I find it hard enough staying connected with family members. My sister for example is always out with various friends, on holiday, or a trip away etc and I wonder if these people ever sleep?

I can’t be the only one with a boring life, am I?

I have no idea why those things take up all your time at the weekend if there’s just one of you? What actual tasks are you doing? Maybe write down everything you do in a Saturday and Sunday and see if anything can be pared down?

What time do you finish work? 5? And go to bed at 10pm? I don’t understand how dinner and shower take up the majority of that time. And laundry without kids must be not a daily thing. I find the busier I am the more productive I am, what about starting some regular evening weeknight hobbies? I work full time, hybrid in the office, and am single parent to 3, they are away alternate weekends but I have a boyfriend/partner I spend time with then. I’m also part of a weekly group that rehearses one night a week, am involved in a community group on some Sunday mornings and go to exercise classes before or after work or at the weekends. I transport my kids to 7 different weekly activities between them (lots of them are dance). I’m exhausted sometimes and my house and garden aren’t perfect but I manage.

Disclaimer - I don’t work full time but you clearly need to do things more efficiently.

Get up early and exercise or do housework before you start work. Laundry really doesn’t take up much time - stick a load in first thing (5 min) and hang it out (10 min maybe). Who rings relatives for a chat every day? If you feel the need to speak to them put them on loudspeaker while you get on with a task.

I’m single, work full time, and work from home four days a week, and I genuinely don’t understand where your time is going!

I clean as I go, then do a more thorough bathroom clean at the weekend. I have a robot vacuum/mop, and I either put the laundry on overnight and hang it up before work, or run it during the day and hang it up on my lunch break. Grocery shopping for one doesn’t take long anyway, and I often get it delivered, then just pick up anything else I need while I’m out for a walk.

On top of that, I see friends for dinner, drinks, activities, or the theatre two to four evenings a week, usually have plans with friends most weekends, work out three mornings a week before work, do a trustee role, some informal consultancy, and speak to my family regularly. I still have time to read, enjoy one of my many hobbies, and just relax.

And that’s while managing a chronic illness that can flare up if I overdo things.

What are you doing that takes so long???

Another childfree not getting how you have no time.
We do bits over the week there and there. There is very little life admin unless you have health issues really. The walking is probably what, hour and bit a day? You should still have plenty unless you sleep 9pm-7am and work 10 hour days.

Weekends are usually spent doing essential things like food shopping, laundry, house and garden stuff.

I have tried to arrange our lives so that all of those things happen during the week, with the exception of maybe an hour in the garden. I follow the TOMM schedule so things like laundry and cleaning are done Mon-Fri during the week so nothing to do on the weekend except the bare minimum of loading the dishwasher. Meal plan once, shopping either delivered or click and collect (or a small top-up shop on the way home from work).

I also don't clean "to finish" - I set a timer and do 30 mins of cleaning of the "room of the day" and then when it's done, it's done - I don't keep going as I know I'll be back there again in a week's time.

Also combining things. I get 15k steps on my commute by getting off at a different tube stop and walking a little further, I often ring my mum when I'm cooking dinner or driving somewhere, I listen to podcasts while gardening, DH irons while we watch TV in the evenings etc.

In fact @TheHungryHungryLandsharks looks like we have quite a similar approach!!

Worked full time and was a single parent to two DC. Did very little for about 15 years, other than work, clean, cook and parent. Obviously did occasionally do stuff and met up with friends and family at weekends but until the DC were old enough to be left alone, I didn't really do anything for myself other than watch a bit of TV, read a book or do some exercises on the floor of my living room!

I also turned into a machine of efficiency, which I am trying to unlearn, as it is not a relaxing way to live your life. I am therefore immediately wondering why @latesummerearlyautumn2 you are spending your precious time going to a supermarket, when you could have a delivery. I'm also wondering how you can possibly be spending so much time on housework? Unless you live in a giant mansion with a huge garden, you should be able to keep on top of your living space in a fairly small amount of time. What are you doing that takes so long to achieve? I'm also wondering if you work until really late and have a long commute? How can a shower and a bite to eat take up so much of your evening?

When it comes to working there's full time and there's full time. Someone (like me) with a 37.5 hour week, no overtime, hybrid working and a 20 minute commute on office days has hugely more time than someone with a 40-50 hour week plus 1h+ commute and more presenteeism/overtime expected.

For me exercise has definitely gone out the window though since having DC and working full time.

I dont have a lot of leisure time tbh. Between work, essential jobs & taking the kids to various activities or parties etc, i dont have much time left. Most people i know its the same

Online shopping takes time to look for items, search for offers etc , probably longer than if I just drove to the shop and did it myself.

Pre kids I used to work tonnes of hours, travel for work at least once a fortnight, commute an hour each way and I still wasn't spending hours at the weekend doing housework.

I'm working from home today, I've done a load of washing already and that's on the line, the other load should finish soon so I'll peg that out while I'm waiting for the kettle to boil. Lunchtime I'm going to a gym class and will nip into the shop on the way home to get the essentials we need. Yesterday I put the hoover round downstairs on my lunchbreak and cleaned our ensuite, still had time for a quick walk too.

In all honesty I never get enough sleep and I exercise when I can, I'm not sure we can have it all. That said I felt like you prior to DC. I now realise I had oodles of time I just wasted more of it. Try doing TOMM to keep on top of housework rather than doing it all on a weekend, 1 load of laundry a day, get food shopping delivered after work one evening.

Oh stop it lol.

You're shopping for one person.

How long can it possibly take?

It definitely doesn't!

And you don't even need to commute to or from work so even if it took as long as 20 minutes on your phone to order your shopping, it shouldn't be a problem!

Before kids I had LOADS of time - all evening, all weekend. I’d clean on Saturday morning (and the kitchen every evening) laundry as hoc… I’m sure I will have time again, but for now I do 2 x 12hr shifts with toddlers each weekend and 3/4 hour each day … you fit in what you have to fit in. It’s not like I can say ‘ah well, we won’t eat tonight as I’ve not got time’

Your ex boyfriend sounds fab to me. I'd love that!!

Maybe I am the ex boyfriend in a parallel universe. I was looking at my calendar and our next free Saturday is 3rd October 🤣

I have no time like you but I spend all my time on tiktok

I look back now and wonder how I did it when I worked full time with an hour each way commute. But I did. As they say, if you need something done ask a busy person…

Book a delivery slot, add the bits and bobs you run out of /think of during the week and then a quick 10 mins the night before.

OP how long do you spend doom scrolling, watching Netflix or similar else that is a complete drain on your time? There must be something else that you are doing?

I'm not being snarky, but I'm genuinely perplexed that you feel this way when you don't have kids. I'm not saying you don't feel very bust and tuckered out – clearly you do – but how? Do you work very long hours?

In the morning choose one room before work, dust and hoover it, job done.
laundry gets put on in the morning, hung out at lunchtime. If you iron, really cut down on how much you iron.
If you need to have a long chat with someone each evening, ring them whilst you’re on your walk.
Online shopping doesn’t take long, the first time does. After that offers are at the top of the list and then you just click the usuals you want.
kids have now left and house work does not encroach on my weekend because I just do bits throughout the week. Up at 6.00, ready by 7.00 that leaves me an hour to do stuff.
I wonder if you’re struggling with time management.

But even if you drove to the shop and did it yourself, unless you live in the middle of nowhere it’s an errand which takes an hour tops - and could also be done on the way home from something you were doing in the evening or at the weekend rather than dragging it out as a standalone chore.

same… how on earth did I drop kids off to the childminders and get to work via train and tube, on repeat?! Wfh with older teens now, is pure luxury!

A lot of people saying they don’t understand how/why I don’t have free time - I’m talking mainly about social lives/ going out/ maintaining friendships. Friendships need constant maintenance and as a result I’ve not been able to keep many - they seem too busy too with work and general living.

But there are often people who don’t work at all who say they are busy and have no free time, so it’s all relative.

I think this time of year brings it home more too, with the longer days.