AIBU to hammer on the walls when neighbours are noisy?

[Senso]

I have neighbours who think nothing of putting on a washing load at midnight, and generally behaving utterly selfishly with regards to noise.

I have asked politely if they could be mindful. Their response was to let me know when they are going to do noisy activities, as though that makes it ok.

AIBU to take to hammering on the walls each and every time they annoy me? I have been doing this for a few days now.

The first few times, they knocked on my door to say that they were disturbed by my hammering to which I replied that they had disturbed me with their noise so I decided to do my own diy to co-ordinate with their noise.

This afternoon, they were playing loud music and so I started hammering. They knocked on my door but I ignored them.

AIBU?

^ this.

If you don't want the hassle of neighbours buy a detached property.

We are detached. Have 5 neighbouring houses. Next door have a baby, toddler and chickens, over the fence have great taste in music. One guy came round to complain about noise we made at 2am and stayed chatting to OH for 1/2 hour. (We don't make noise at 2am anymore) can I add the school and military base to the noise observations. None of this bothers me.

you've spoken to them, game on. They sound really thick.

great diplomatic skills, you have

but noise is subjective, your noise may not be the same as their noise etc ?

I didn’t say it should, I said it won’t make any difference.

If they were happy enough to annoy previous neighbours they’re not going to change for you unfortunately.

Why can’t they play loud music in the afternoon?

The point is that every time they annoy me with incessant noise, I am doing the same back. Yes it’s petty but it makes me feel better rather than just cope with it and seethe.

but then they try to complain which I ignore.

explain why I am being unreasonable

OP I quite like your style.

explain why I am being unreasonable

Because two wrongs don't make a right?

the neighbours may well be behaving unreasonably by running a washing machine that transmits significant vibration late at night and by playing loud music despite repeated requests.

However, your response is also unreasonable because you have moved from trying to stop the disturbance to intentionally causing one yourself. Your own words "it clearly annoys them" and "it makes me feel better" show that the purpose of the hammering is retaliation rather than resolution.

That doesn't mean your frustration is unjustified. It means the chosen response is unlikely to improve the situation and may undermine any future complaint you make, because it places both parties in a pattern of mutual nuisance rather than leaving you as the person seeking relief from it.

I’m not aiming to be right. I am just giving back the same annoyance that they are giving me

You’ve asked nicely for some manners and consideration more than once and they have chosen to ignore you. Hammer away. Every time until they get the message. Some people are too thick to understand anything else.

and some people are too rude to be reasoned with,

Thank you 😊

What sanctimonious tripe

IMO your response shows the root of the problem.

So why ask if you are being unreasonable if you are fine with it?

Yep. I don’t care if it’s petty and tit for tat. I’ll give as good as I get

I’m not fine with it. That’s why I am hammering on the walls when they make incessant noise. The point is that it makes me feel better instead of meekly accepting their noise after repeated attempts at communication. What is difficult to understand?

Your opinion is wrong

and yet you know its true, otherwise feel free to correct me on how you think im wrong ? and if the answer is your hammer, then that proves my point

It’s you that’s not understood. I asked why you were asking if you were fine with being unreasonable. You obviously don’t care if you are being unreasonable, so why ask?

Yes YABU, being childish and banging on their walls will likely make them ensure their noise is louder and at worse times. You cannot police when people put a wash on.
Either you suck it up or you move. Why come here and ask IYABU if you didn’t want answers?

IMO you're making problems for yourself further down the line.

If you ever want to move you will have to declare any disputes with neighbours and not revealing that info could invalidate your sale.

Antagonising your already "awkward" neighbours could cause an escalation of their bad behaviour. If they are not prepared to respond to polite requests and be reasonable they might take things further.

I've known people have red paint thrown at their front door and weedkiller poured on the lawn.

The stupid is well and truly out here on MN.