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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What would you do in this situation

60 replies

Shopping7777 · 25/04/2026 20:06

Had some free items outside the house in a box clearly labelled as free. Someone came to pick something up I had offered separately and also took a dinning set that was outside that was mine. I’ve told the they said they would return it still haven’t. I thought it was clear enough but obviously not. I did Aplogsie fo the mistake however it’s still not been returned. Surely in. Way it’s stealing?

OP posts:
Jellybunny98 · 25/04/2026 20:15

Why was there a dining set outside next to items free to take? I can see why they would have assumed it was also there to take.

AttachmentFTW · 25/04/2026 20:16

Yes it's stealing, they took something from you without permission that you weren't giving away. It may have been a misunderstanding or they may be CF.

Give them a deadline and if they don't return it say you will contact the police. When you say a dining set do you mean plates or a table and chairs that were outside?

Snaletrale · 25/04/2026 20:24

Patio table and chairs? Otherwise can see why the confusion happened if normal furniture was outside.

Yeahyeahyeahnooooo · 25/04/2026 20:30

I can see how it's happened if you've left loads of stuff out the front labelled as free. Why was the dining set out there?

Shopping7777 · 25/04/2026 20:32

Yeahyeahyeahnooooo · 25/04/2026 20:30

I can see how it's happened if you've left loads of stuff out the front labelled as free. Why was the dining set out there?

Yes I can see why but at the same time once you know you shouldn’t have taken it it’s stealing to not return it. Was out there as it’s my sons in a bin bag away from the other stuff he was meant to be picking it up.

OP posts:
Shopping7777 · 25/04/2026 20:32

Personally I would rake through random bin bags

OP posts:
Jellybunny98 · 25/04/2026 20:33

I’d chalk this up as your mistake to be honest and move on

Shopping7777 · 25/04/2026 20:33

Yeahyeahyeahnooooo · 25/04/2026 20:30

I can see how it's happened if you've left loads of stuff out the front labelled as free. Why was the dining set out there?

The free stuff was also clearly in a box labelled as such.

OP posts:
Lmnop22 · 25/04/2026 20:35

Putting something outside next to a box marked “free” which was separate is bizarre.

If it was your son’s couldn’t you have organised him to collect it another time or taken it out to him when he was there??

Raquelos · 25/04/2026 20:41

Regardless of the endless posts you will get telling you that it is your own fault for not being clear (which might even be a bit true), once the person was told they had made a mistake and shouldn't have taken it, they should have returned it promptly, preferably with an apology for the mix-up.

If I were you, I would probably let them know that you need it back by a specific date (soon) and that if you don't have it by then, you will be reporting it to the police as stolen.

ColdAsAWitches · 25/04/2026 20:41

Told them when? How long ago was it? If it was an hour ago you're being unreasonable. Last week, less so.

Shopping7777 · 25/04/2026 20:43

ColdAsAWitches · 25/04/2026 20:41

Told them when? How long ago was it? If it was an hour ago you're being unreasonable. Last week, less so.

On Tuesday

OP posts:
Shopping7777 · 25/04/2026 20:44

Lmnop22 · 25/04/2026 20:35

Putting something outside next to a box marked “free” which was separate is bizarre.

If it was your son’s couldn’t you have organised him to collect it another time or taken it out to him when he was there??

Wasn’t next to the box

OP posts:
KilkennyCats · 25/04/2026 20:44

A dining set in a bin bag??
Rather silly to leave it in the front garden at all, never mind beside a pile of stuff labelled “free”.

Shopping7777 · 25/04/2026 20:44

Jellybunny98 · 25/04/2026 20:33

I’d chalk this up as your mistake to be honest and move on

So it’s okay to steal?

OP posts:
PillsBox · 25/04/2026 20:44

I’d go and pick it up from them and apologise for the confusion I’d clearly caused.

Shopping7777 · 25/04/2026 20:46

PillsBox · 25/04/2026 20:44

I’d go and pick it up from them and apologise for the confusion I’d clearly caused.

I don’t have her address and don’t drive. She also took enough stuff for free so not unreasonable to want the one thing back she shouldn’t have taken she got quite a bit from me

OP posts:
newornotnew · 25/04/2026 20:47

What do you mean by dining set?
An indoor table and chairs, or a garden table and chairs?

I don't really know what your next move should be!

Evaka · 25/04/2026 20:48

Situation sounds really weird and of your making I'm afraid.

Jellybunny98 · 25/04/2026 20:50

Shopping7777 · 25/04/2026 20:44

So it’s okay to steal?

No, but this was your confusing mistake and won’t interest police in the slightest so chalk it up to a mistake.

PillsBox · 25/04/2026 20:53

Shopping7777 · 25/04/2026 20:46

I don’t have her address and don’t drive. She also took enough stuff for free so not unreasonable to want the one thing back she shouldn’t have taken she got quite a bit from me

Yeah but it was only shite that you wanted rid of.

If you won’t go and get it, it doesn’t look like you’ll get it back.

Shopping7777 · 25/04/2026 20:58

PillsBox · 25/04/2026 20:53

Yeah but it was only shite that you wanted rid of.

If you won’t go and get it, it doesn’t look like you’ll get it back.

Stuff I could have Sold yes

OP posts:
Shopping7777 · 25/04/2026 20:59

Jellybunny98 · 25/04/2026 20:50

No, but this was your confusing mistake and won’t interest police in the slightest so chalk it up to a mistake.

Well just goes to show people’s mind sets. I personally wouldn’t keep something someone said wasn’t to take

OP posts:
Jellybunny98 · 25/04/2026 21:00

Shopping7777 · 25/04/2026 20:59

Well just goes to show people’s mind sets. I personally wouldn’t keep something someone said wasn’t to take

Good for you.

ShetlandishMum · 25/04/2026 21:01

Tbh learning by doing. Don't place things next to a sign with "free".

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