Entitled spider in my kitchen

[Definetelynotanathlete]

So this is mostly a rant about the spiders. I absolutely hate them.
My DC and I went away yesterday for overnight trip to visit my friend. Before we left, I checked everything is turned off, windows are closed etc. I noticed empty glass in my DD bedroom and I took it downstairs and left it by the sink. We got back this evening and after I cooked the dinner, I put everything in the dishwasher. Then I pick up the glass and there was a gigantic spider at the bottom and he spun a bit of the cobweb at the bottom of the glass. I swear he was so big, I could see his teeth or whatever you call them. What is he doing in my kitchen is the question I ask?! I thought the rule is, that massive house spiders live outside in the spring/summer and try to come inside the house in the autumn. But oh no! This asshole was prancing around my kitchen counter while I was gone. I don’t actually know if he was a male but I assume he was as he had the audacity to disturbed my peace in my own home😂

They seem to be everywhere at the moment. We’ve just been away for a week and came back to find a massive spider had colonised a large teddy my son had left in his room on the floor. It was covered in thick sticky web and the spider was proudly guarding his new home. He was huge, but we’ve seen quite a few since we got back, including one living under a pocket flap of a pair of my trousers 🫣

YABU was he's already in the glass ready for you to tip him out of the window. He's provided his own transport out of there after housesitting all night. Poor spidey........ 😃

YABU ..... he's already in the glass ready for you to tip him out of the window. He's provided his own transport out of there after housesitting all night. Poor spidey........ 😃

Zero -in spider repellent, its brilliant. I hate spiders and use this. It stops them entering your home. It doesn't damage anything. Spray it around door ways , windows, anywhere, where they can get in...it smells of peppermint. There are plenty of repellents on the market, and they are all good...

We lived in north devon where the false black widow was prevalent in our house, round shiny brown or black body and legs shorter than house spider, (markings on its back aren't always noticeable ) Moved recently and was horrified to find one in a gap in the window frame down here in the south. They bite.. squash them, they aren't native to the uk although with global warming ???????

The spindle skinny cellar spiders (I think that's what they're called) can catch and eat the big chunky house spiders.
Was on holiday a few years ago in a lovely rural cottage in Wales and saw it happen.

We call the one who lives on our washing line Boris.

If anyone is interested in more humane ways to deter spiders, use mint. Either mint essential oil or mint based deterrant products. This is not harming anyhing, is pet safe but the spiders don't like the smell and don't go near it. Wipe your doors, window ledges with it and spray it in corners of the rooms. I did it at the start and it worked but now I gave up the fight as they don't bother me. No matter how big and hairy they are, I pick them up (yes with bare hands) and drop them out the window. I am not afraid of them and I never was bit by one as far as I remember.
Edited for typos

I think my username says everything that’s required about the eight-legged little fuckers.

All spiders in my house are called 'Webster'.

I read a funny Tweet yesterday about spiders, and a woman said that she had named the enormous spider in her bedroom Cotton Eyed Joe.

Cos - where did you come from?
Where did you go?

My Dad found a massive hairy one once in the kitchen sink so opened the kitchen window and threw it out. A bird literally swooped down from no where and took it away! It was amazing.

I literally just found this meme when scrolling through my photos for something else….feels appropriate to leave it here… 😂