Would this comment offend you - DH about gym

[CazJK]

My DH is off work this week, so has been going to the gym in the morning rather than after work in the evening.

I asked him when he got back earlier if he is enjoying going at the start of the day when he has more energy, and he basically said - ‘all the MILF’s are there in their tight leggings after the school run which is the main benefit’.

I didn’t laugh - infact I found it really quite rude towards myself. Have I had a sense of humour failure or would this annoy you too?

He’s a pig. Especially using the term MILF. I wouldn’t like it

If this is his usual sense of humour and the sort of banter you share then it's just a joke.

How did he take it when you told him you were offended?

Bleargh.

He has form for some crude comments but knows I don’t approve.

He just said he was joking and I’ve ‘nothing to worry about’ (nice!)

I would be fuming.

Prime example of why not every thought in your head should come out of your mouth

I'd be very unimpressed and would make him regret ever saying anything.

A filter would not have gone amiss here. Yes, it was crude and uncalled for but probably not worth picking a fight over.

I'd think there was some truth in it, so yes I'd be offended

Eww. What a creep. You should ask him if he thinks comments like that will make him more or less attractive to you?

I’d have made a similar comment about how hopefully regular gym sessions would turn him into a DILF, we’d both laugh and then get on with our day. But I’m not you so only you know whether it was meant disrespectfully or in a more jokey way.

I’d reply, cool, any more comments like that and you can bring a bag to see which one will take you home. You won’t be getting back here.
inside it would annoy me but I think it was just a bad joke

Why I went to an all female gym! But I presume he’s just pulling your leg…

Id have just retorted " well I'm sure they are not looking at you"

Oh ffs 🫣

Disrespectful towards you. Also in some way implies you are not a MILF, I wouldn’t forgive my DH if he said that.

Wouldn't be an issue here, we talk about MILFs, DILFs, sometimes GILFs get a mention!

deal breaker for me.

im very lucky though that I am able to set my bar to a decent level as I’m happy single though and no kids together or finances to think about. I accept it’s not the same for others.

it’s a deal breaker because if he says that, then he for sure is absolutely looking, and as I work in a gym, I find it absolutely disgusting when men are letching over women in tight clothes. It’s really grim.

ew

I would lose my shit

Yeah that is what has offended me - the description, a bit more than a throw away comment in my opinion.

That wouldn’t bother me - but it totally depends on the tone in which it was said, and the dynamic of your relationship and the humour between the two of you. I went to a non-league football match last week and had to go into the team clubhouse to use the loo after the final whistle. DP said ‘It’s down the corridor just past the changing rooms’ and I said ‘Ooh, I hope I catch a glimpse of them all stripping off for their showers, then’. But we have the sort of relationship where we joke about that sort of thing and it’s really clear between us that we’re only kidding; it’s not a case of exploiting each others insecurities or winding each other up and it’s fine.

BUT in your case, your DP knows you don’t like this sort of comment and was presumably deliberately goading you by saying it, or trying to make you feel insecure. It doesn’t sound like mutual banter, and therefore YANBU to be pissed off.

🤮🤮🤮

Ick. Conjures up the image of the leery bloke waiting for bending and lunges etc so they can perv at bums.

I wouldn't think it was rude about me personally just obnoxious in general