14 yo Teenager refusing a haircut

[FootFlapperage]

I've been trying to convince my son he really needs a trim up, you can still see the style when he had it done so wouldn't be to upsetting for him
But he's adamant that's how he wants it & it's making me anxious. It's so bushy now, and he doesn't brush & he'll wash in the shower if I'm lucky.
I'm surprised the school hasn't spoken to me about it, I need some advice please, because I'm on my own and it's difficult to get support.. I'd ask my mum to take us but she's unwell.
The barbers are out of town too
Aibu to my son?

It's just hair 🤷‍♀️ Just leave him to it.

Long hair for boys is currently fashionable.

As long as he is tying it back for PE etc school are unlikely to care.

YABU, it’s his hair!!

It's his hair op, unclench and let it go.

Pick your battles!

What’s wrong with him having longer hair?

It's his hair and he's 14 years old. Just leave him to it, honestly why are you even giving this headspace? Try not to worry, there are so many things to worry about and this isn't one of them

Pfffft. I have 14 year old dts who refuse hair cuts and wearing goats.
I have no answers only sympathy.

His hair, his decision. However. Washing hair, showering and being clean is non negotiable.

I refuse to wear a goat as well.

Tell him he can grow it / style it as he wants but personal hygiene is non negotiable.

Wearing a goat must be a bit smelly.

Now I can't help picturing goats with unruly coats refusing their trims

But yes OP thankfully this is one you can throw onto the stop worrying about pile. I was about the same age when I stopped getting my haircut. I've never been back, it turns out hairdressers are not the compulsory life thing my DM thought they were. He'll be fine.

As long as it's clean and brushed, who cares?

My kids' rule is that as long as it's clean and they can get a brush through it, it's up to them.

I would draw the line at goats, though.

Goats smell.

Im having the same problem OP

I feel like an important question here is why doesn't he want it cutting?

Does he like it how it is? is he trying to grow it out for a different style? Is he struggling with his mental health and just not caring about his appearance and hygiene?

Why is it a problem?

This isn't worth stressing yourself out over op. My ds went through a similar phase...the more you go on about it, the more he'll dig his heels in. Just don't mention it. I stopped myself from nagging him and eventually he decided himself to have it cut. It's a control thing I reckon.

What did the school say?

Absolutely leave him as he is. If having long hair is the worst thing he does during teenage years, well in the big picture, that’s good.
Could be far worse.

You can require he wash, but not that he cut his hair. His hairstyle should be his choice.

anxious over hair really?