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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Woken by neighbour's motorbike 3.30am each morning

131 replies

Moonshinestarlight · 25/10/2023 04:45

I'm not sure if there is a solution to this but it is killing me. In the past month or so neighbour has been leaving home at 3.30am every morning- presumably for work. They leave on a motorbike that is waking me. I have to get up at 5am and just cannot get back to sleep so it means I'm starting my day at 3.30am every single morning. I am exhausted and it's affecting me mentally and emotionally. I tried wearing earplugs but need to be able to hear my children in case they need me in the night so that's not an option. Nor is moving to a different bedroom.

I will try speak to my neighbour but not sure what they'll say as understandly they need to leave at that time. It's just the motorbike is so loud and it's having a significantly detrimental impact on me. I just want to cry.

Anyone have any advice?

OP posts:
MinnieL · 25/10/2023 04:53

Realistically, what would you like your neighbour to do if their motorbike is their mode of transport? Push it down the road, round the corner and when they’ve got the all clear finally start the engine? It’d be U for you to even talk to them about it imo.

How old are your children? I’d suggest wearing ear plugs and getting the children to come to your room and shake you gently to wake you up if the need anything. Or if they’re little, I’d be putting ear plugs in around 3am so that I know I’m covered for two hours. Doubt that will work though if you can’t go back to sleep from 3:30

BusterGonad · 25/10/2023 04:58

Why would anyone have a loud motorbike when they work early mornings? What a selfish prick.

OrderOfTheKookaburra · 25/10/2023 04:59

Can he aim the motorbike muffler towards his house rather than yours? Could he start it up in his garage?

He could certainly take off with less revs.

OlyRoller · 25/10/2023 05:19

Get some wax earplugs

floofbag · 25/10/2023 06:07

At our first house there was a man who had the noisiest diesel van . He used to leave it running at 3.30 for 20 minutes and the fecker was deafening . So bloody selfish . We moved after 18 months

Redhothoochycoocher · 25/10/2023 06:08

I find it really hard to get back to sleep if I'm woken after 3am. I listen to the Get Sleepy podcast. They've a few different narrators but the only one that reliably gets me back to sleep is Thomas Jones (always says who is narrating in the details). I've just opened one to check his name and I'm like Pavlov's dog hearing his voice, just a few seconds of it made me sleepy! Maybe try something like this?

ChocolateCakeOverspill · 25/10/2023 06:10

BusterGonad · 25/10/2023 04:58

Why would anyone have a loud motorbike when they work early mornings? What a selfish prick.

Because they don’t drive a car / can’t afford a car / don’t have access to public transport at that time of day / needs to work at that time of day. I’m sure there are other possibilities too.

kokotheguerilla · 25/10/2023 06:13

I sympathise OP because I’m also the kind of person who can’t get back to sleep if disturbed. However, I leave for work at 5:30 and in the winter I have to leave the car engine running for a couple of minutes to clear the inside front windscreen. Not much I can do other than be as quiet as I can with the car door.

Lovehearts82 · 25/10/2023 06:14

If earplugs are not an option could you sleep with some white noise playing? This could muffle the sounds enough that you sleep through them. If you have an alexa or Spotify there are some different ones on there, so could use whatever works for you. Also some on YouTube.

lamalamalamasquirrel · 25/10/2023 06:14

You can't really say anything. It's a legal form of transport just like a car. It just happens to be a noisy one. It's not like if it were an ice-cream van and they were choosing to play the jingle.

MikeRafone · 25/10/2023 06:17

There is a legal limit if 89db
there are ways of muffling the sound

lamalamalamasquirrel · 25/10/2023 06:17

Options for you to consider (will depend on your circumstances and accommodation)

  1. Sleep round the other side of the house (back/front etc)
  2. Get better windows if you don't already.
  3. Shut windows at night if you don't already.
  4. Soundproof curtains.
  5. Earplugs.
MidnightOnceMore · 25/10/2023 06:21

You can train yourself to go back to sleep. People do this very successfully. The first step is to change your mindset so practice saying 'I can fall back asleep when woken up in the night".

Unfortunately unless the bike is illegally loud, I'm not sure you can do anything as he's going to work.

shellyleppard · 25/10/2023 06:31

Can they not roll it round the corner/away from house before starting it up??

MariaVT65 · 25/10/2023 06:41

I would try some earplugs to see if they help.

I wear foam earplugs as I’m a light sleeper, and I still hear my son crying without a problem.

Papillon23 · 25/10/2023 06:46

You can use a phone to measure the number of decibels from the motorcycle I think. But I'd be pretty wary of starting a dispute with any neighbours in case you want to move.

I can really understand why you'd be exhausted and frustrated though. The occasional unexpected interruption is one thing. Knowing it will happen is another.

How old are your kids? Can they come and find you if they need you in the night? My mum wrote earplugs for pretty much my entire childhood and it was fine.

NoNameNoOne · 25/10/2023 06:50

Ulez, cost of living, motorbike is cheaper to buy and run than a car - possibly saves a huge amount of time on a commute. How can you call someone nasty names not knowing their situation?
OP - not that it helps right now, but with colder wetter weather coming, perhaps they will stop using? Right now, I personally would knock and ask them if there is somewhere they could wheel it to and then start it up to stop it from waking you. Hope you get it sorted :)

bellac11 · 25/10/2023 06:57

shellyleppard · 25/10/2023 06:31

Can they not roll it round the corner/away from house before starting it up??

Presumably its still outside someones house when it starts up. Unless OP lives in a hamlet of 2 houses surrounded by fields?

Part of not being able to get back to sleep is being annoyed at whats happened so its about reframing the thoughts about how irritated you are. He's not selfish or inconsiderate, he needs to get to work.

AnxiousPangolin · 25/10/2023 07:00

BusterGonad · 25/10/2023 04:58

Why would anyone have a loud motorbike when they work early mornings? What a selfish prick.

Just because it’s a motorbike doesn’t automatically mean it’s loud. Any engine starting at 3.30am is going to feel noisy because there is no backdrop of daily noise to mask it.

If the guy uses it as his transport for work then he’s hardly being a selfish prick. If you can’t wear earplugs then I’m not really sure what your option is.

Vettrianofan · 25/10/2023 07:04

You just have to put earplugs in. Unlike other noises in the past I have had to put up with, your neighbour obviously is using the bike as a mode of transport. It's done for a reason, not to piss people off. Try and look at it from that perspective.

Not everyone works 9 til 5.

Turrican · 25/10/2023 07:04

Can you try white noise at all? I use the Amazon speaker on the bedside table and play rain sounds over night which drowns out neighbour noise really well. Used to be kept awake all night by a nocturnal noisy neighbour and I was so miserable and tired all the time but it has worked a treat and now don't have to worry about noise.

ThePoshUns · 25/10/2023 07:05

shellyleppard · 25/10/2023 06:31

Can they not roll it round the corner/away from house before starting it up??

And disturb the people that live around the corner?!

sandgrown · 25/10/2023 07:05

I empathise OP. My neighbour’s son has one of those cars with a really noisy exhaust and leaves at 5.30 every day but I accept he needs to get to work . Another neighbour is a complete selfish arse who revs his very noisy sports car about 8am every Sunday morning when some people are trying to have a lie in.

MintJulia · 25/10/2023 07:06

It depends what you mean by loud. Loud in contrast to the 3am quiet or loud because it has a hole in the exhaust?

If the bike isn't faulty, he's doing nothing wrong, but you can learn to sleep through it. The brain wakes to unfamiliar sounds, eventually it will become 'normal' and your brain will discount it.

I find that hot chocolate tends to send me back to sleep pretty efficiently. You could try that.