Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Wearing a white dress to a hen do

63 replies

DancingInSeptember · 19/02/2023 22:16

Just as the title says - AIBU to think you don’t wear a white dress to a hen do that you are a bridesmaid for?
(Name changed for this, there is of course a backstory to this but I was the bride and aware my opinion will be influenced by the situation!)

OP posts:
Redglitter · 19/02/2023 22:34

Don't be ridiculous. A hen night is just a night out. People can wear what ever colour they want

MichelleScarn · 19/02/2023 22:34

You can't police what people wear to a night out!!

pippabg · 19/02/2023 22:35

I don't think it's anything to be annoyed about, but I wouldn't do it as I know it's pretty common now for the bride to wear white on her hen do to mark herself out from the rest of the hens. The person who did it wouldn't have had any ill intentions, just probably not thought about it - please don't lose any friendships over it! If you're annoyed, I'd try to move on from it.

DappledThings · 19/02/2023 22:35

Unless hen do is a typical for wedding then yes, you are being very unreasonable. Is there some ridiculous notion now that the bride wears white to the hen do as well as the wedding?

Bikeybikeface · 19/02/2023 22:35

How ridiculous 🙄

DappledThings · 19/02/2023 22:35

DappledThings · 19/02/2023 22:35

Unless hen do is a typical for wedding then yes, you are being very unreasonable. Is there some ridiculous notion now that the bride wears white to the hen do as well as the wedding?

Ironically "typical" above is a typo for typo.

Daisy03 · 19/02/2023 22:37

Blacknosugarplease · 19/02/2023 22:20

Genuinely cannot understand what the issue is? I had to re-read your post to make sure you wrote hen do and not wedding. What’s the issue with wearing white at a hen do?

Exactly this

Dotcheck · 19/02/2023 22:37

OP
Are you one of those brides who makes the entire guest list wear coordinating outfits?

YABVVVVU

Helloits2023 · 19/02/2023 22:39

I’ve heard of hen dos where it is coordinated so all the hens wear e.g. pink and the bride wears white. But I’d very much expect that to be arranged and agreed- I don’t think it’s a universal norm like not wearing white to a wedding. And certainly hasn’t been a thing at any hen do I’ve attended.

NewlyDiabeticMum · 19/02/2023 22:40

Was it a wedding dress?

Purplecatshopaholic · 19/02/2023 22:40

What on earth is the issue with wearing white at a hen do? I have heard it all now!

QueSyrahSyrah · 19/02/2023 22:41

Eh? Unless there's a particular tacky theme then you just wear whatever you'd usually wear for a night out for a hen do surely?

There is absolutely no social convention about not wearing white to a hen party.

MelaniesFlowers · 19/02/2023 22:41

It’s a hen do, not the wedding.

There is no “avoid white” dress code to a hen do.

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 19/02/2023 22:45

Dear god, what is it with this hen do batshittery. Of course white is fine it’s not the bloody wedding. Precious or what

MoreSleepPleasee · 19/02/2023 22:45

There's no issue. My relative said she was wearing white to her hen do and asked us to wear anything but white. Did you do that?

MavisMcMinty · 19/02/2023 22:45

I wouldn’t wear white, but that’s because I can’t wear white clothes for longer than 10 minutes before there’s ketchup or cigarette burns all over it. Shoulda invited me to your hen night.

Stupidpeoplesuck · 19/02/2023 22:53

Why not put a dress code on the invites, or tell your organisers to do so if it was a surprise?

Rupiduti · 19/02/2023 22:54

Wtf.... is this a new rule I don't know about? How odd!

Anoisagusaris · 19/02/2023 22:58

wtf? Although I suspect you see the type of person who would have a themed hen or set a colour code. I genuinely think people who are in to that sort of shite are a bit dim.

HoppingPavlova · 19/02/2023 23:00

Never heard of this in all my years. Maybe you are getting confused with the wedding itself?

Aprilx · 19/02/2023 23:01

No dress code at a hen do. I would absolutely abide by the convention of not wearing white to a wedding.

KrisAkabusi · 19/02/2023 23:01

No. Unless everyone is in costume, there is no dress code for a hen do!

Emmamoo89 · 19/02/2023 23:01

🙄

Lavender14 · 19/02/2023 23:01

My feeling is that I wouldn't wear anything white/ overly pale to anything wedding related including the hen etc. Some people might not care (I personally wouldn't care unless it was lace and floor length with a veil) but its best not to risk it and let the bride have their moment.

DulcetTones · 19/02/2023 23:09

Unless you've asked them not to wear white, I wouldn't expect that to cross anyone's mind. Perhaps a bit off to show up in a lacy white dress, but otherwise, not a problem.