To think this post was completely out of order?

[ohmano]

A woman on my Instagram put up a story and wrote, 'only poofs get hangovers' with a picture of her smiling (she is married to a man).

I messaged the woman the following....

'You do know that the word ‘poof’ is a homophobic slur commonly used against gay men? It is highly inappropriate that you have used such a word whether in jest or not and then broadcast it amongst all your followers (plenty I’m sure are as disgusted and appalled as myself). It’s not funny, it’s not acceptable, and I suggest you educate yourself on appropriate and non-derogatory language'

She responded - 'Thanks for the education. I’ll be sure to educate myself so that everyone who already knows I’m the furthest thing from homophobic, continue to know I’m the furthest thing from homophobic. You won’t know that because you’ve taken time out of your day to message a STRANGER, someone you do not know and will never know, so cheers for the disgust and judgement from one post. Anyway, I’ll let you get back to being embarrassed on behalf of random people on Instagram and selling Tropic Skincare. Hope your business is thriving'

And is now continuing to hound me. Maybe I should have kept my mouth shut but I couldn't believe how brazen she was to post such a thing. AIBU?

She is a twat and lashing out because you called her out on it

I think choose your battles.
jyst let it go, don’t retaliate and don’t rise to it.

Yanbu. Whether she thinks she's homophobic or not the fact is she used an offensive slur in her post.

YABU to be flogging Tropic.

I don't, I shared a post of someone else flogging it though 🤣

It is offensive.
It's not OK to use that kind of slur.
She's a cunt,you can't change that. So it's pointless engaging with her anymore.
What is this tropic ?

This is why you don't get into arguments with randoms on the internet. It's not worth your energy, you won't change her.

@DelorisVC I’m not sure you retain the moral high ground about her inappropriate use of language whilst simultaneously calling her a cunt…

Absolutely agree!

YABU for messaging a stranger like that and thinking they'd respond rationally.

And you've repeated the slur.

How did you think she'd respond to such a scathing message?

My response would be horror and an 'oh my god I didn't even think, it wasn't intentional at all, I'll take it down'

Meh

Is she English? Is it possible she thinks poof is a variant of wimp? I once saw the actress Jaime King go to town on someone for calling her a ho, until it was pointed out the poster said hi-ho and was English and not Hi Ho. It was quite funny.

Well your principles are right, but what did you expect?

Report the post to Instagram and leave it.

The fact that she's continuing to hound you may prove that she could be trying ti 'justify' her own ignorant, innapropriate and homophobic behaviour.

If you choose to respond to her, just try to keep all your corresponance with her as polite as your first reply, just in case you need to involve authorities. This is because no one knows just how far she'll go yet.

Isn't it about time we stand up to this sort of shit though and call it out?

No come on, surely you would know that if she’s written it in the first place she’s not going to be horrified is she🙄🙄

Oh don't respond again. She hasn't got the brains or humility to make any good come of it. Just report her homophobic post and her hounding of you. If a slap from Instagram doesn't work, nothing will.

People don’t like being called out on their shit.

just report her post. Not that instagram does much these days but its still worth it, and if they get enough complaints they will
shadow ban her if she has a public page.

I'd ignore it but at the same time I'd take the "if you don't like it scroll on" approach in future, particularly when it comes to messaging strangers self righteous "education" things. Sure it can be used as slur but some people call farts poofs, do you bash them with the education hammer too??

If something isn't directed at anyone or meant to deliberately cause offence, find something better to do with your time than messaging random strangers

She posted a homophobic slur. And didnt like you calling her out on it.

But she might have reacted better had you not started your message with "you do know" - that phrase always annoys people.
And helping to promote a friends mlm is always unreasonable - makes you look like almost as much of a fool as the MLMer.

You suggested she educate herself which implies you accept she may not have known the word was a slur (unlikely but still...) but then you went straight to judgement and shaming.

I think you were virtue signalling. If you wanted to address homophobia there were better ways to do it. You got the response your post deserved and no one learned anything. Well done.

I wouldn't call out a stranger unless it was in real life and in a group setting (and getting them to one side). For something like this you need tone of voice, body and face language, and an ability to keep the discussion flowing...otherwise it ends like this.