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AIBU?

To resent my parents choice of name for me?

367 replies

Blaengwnfi · 29/08/2022 22:36

This is a rant - apologies.

I’ve always hated my name.

No one can pronounce it. Not even my father or siblings. It was always read out incorrectly at school and the other kids would laugh at me. It gives me major anxiety having to introduce myself.

I use my middle name professionally but it doesn’t feel like “my” name. I feel so angry with my parents sometimes for burdening me with this name.

Parents - please think before giving your kid a weird or “unique” name! It could really mess them up…

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Am I being unreasonable?

AIBU

You have one vote. All votes are anonymous.

MbatataOwl · 29/08/2022 22:38

Why don't you just change your name?

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averageavocado · 29/08/2022 22:38

Change it by deed poll

Don't tell them

And what is the name?

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bridgetreilly · 29/08/2022 22:38

You’re an adult, you can choose the name you want.

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SequinsandStilettos · 29/08/2022 22:38

Is it a Welsh name? Are we playing Rumpelstiltskin?!

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SequinsandStilettos · 29/08/2022 22:39

Angharad?!

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XelaM · 29/08/2022 22:40

SequinsandStilettos · 29/08/2022 22:38

Is it a Welsh name? Are we playing Rumpelstiltskin?!

Love that book 😂

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factfile · 29/08/2022 22:40

Threads like this are such a tease. Sorry you're sad but we need to know the name!

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echobunnies · 29/08/2022 22:40

What is your name?

It must be annoying to dislike your name, but I think it’s hard for parents to get it right to be honest. A lot of people hate their name for the opposite reason, because it’s too popular! Not easy to strike the right balance.

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Blaengwnfi · 29/08/2022 22:42

@MbatataOwl I am too old. Besides, I tried by using my “normal” middle name. But it doesn’t feel like me. It’s jarring when someone calls me by my first name, or my middle name. I don’t have an identity which is a total mind fuck. People take having a name for granted.

@SequinsandStilettos Yes, Welsh origin but I’m 100% not sharing on here as it is very outing given how usual is it.

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Blaengwnfi · 29/08/2022 22:42

*unusual

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Sometimeswinning · 29/08/2022 22:43

Your dad cant pronounce it??? Either he had zero interest in naming his child or... no I can't think why.

Your middle name is still your name on your birth certificate. Otherwise as mentioned above change it. Or can you shorten it?

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Blaengwnfi · 29/08/2022 22:43

@echobunnies That is why my mother gave me an unusual name. Because she felt her name is too common.

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rnsaslkih · 29/08/2022 22:44

I agree with you OP. Names need to be functional and not cause difficulties.

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Blaengwnfi · 29/08/2022 22:45

Sorry I did not mean to create a tease thread. This is more of a rant because I’m in a bad mood. (Maybe something to do with having to go back to work tomorrow!)

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Kione · 29/08/2022 22:45

Not sure if it's too late, but can you think of a good nickname?
My name is very common in my country of origin which I hated. I moved to the UK and it's obviously not heard of but not difficult to pronounce, and I love that fact but people that I am not close to call me all sorts of other things.

So I gave my daughter a bit of a different name (easy to pronounce but I did not think people will always read it as a very old fashioned english which she hates although she loves her actual name) but the short version/nickname is again, easy and normal here. We always call her that, she likes it.

I really thought about it a lot. It's not easy, and I feel your pain! I almost changed my name to an English version at one point!

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HeddaGarbled · 29/08/2022 22:47

My parents mis-spelt my name. I spent my childhood years with teachers being arsey about it. When I went to university, I changed the spelling, and now all is well.

One of my brothers did question the way I was spelling it on social media. I told him it was my secret other identity. That was kind of flippant but kind of true: we’re none of us exactly who our families think we are.

What I’m trying to say is let it go. You can be whoever you want to be, having rocketed off the launchpad of your childhood and schooldays.

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Blaengwnfi · 29/08/2022 22:48

@Sometimeswinning Yup, he still can’t pronounce it. Neither can my brothers. It’s infuriating.

@rnsaslkih Thank you. This is exactly how I feel.

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CollywobbleisCreepy · 29/08/2022 22:49

Wholeheartedly agree with you. So many of the baby names suggested on here are completely fucking bonkers. Mumsnet seems to have a very tenuous grasp of what actually constitutes a reasonable name for an adult human being. I am frequently disturbed but also can’t tear myself away from the baby name boards…..

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Sometimeswinning · 29/08/2022 22:49

Blaengwnfi · 29/08/2022 22:48

@Sometimeswinning Yup, he still can’t pronounce it. Neither can my brothers. It’s infuriating.

@rnsaslkih Thank you. This is exactly how I feel.

That's terrible! Can you shorten it? Choose how you would like it pronounced? Change the spelling?

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BobbysGirly · 29/08/2022 22:51

I have a bog standard English name. My DH and all 5 of my children have Welsh names. I hated my name all through my childhood and teen years. DH and kids have never voiced dislike of their names.

If you hate your name that much you could change it by deed poll OP. Or just call yourself a name you like. A name change doesn’t have to be official, unless you want to make it official.

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Notateacheranymore · 29/08/2022 22:52

@CollywobbleisCreepy Even when a name isn’t THAT unusual, just unknown to your Primary school peers it can be hell. I am like Ms Westwood of couture fame, but also the same pronunciation as a male 80’s comedy character. Caused hell for me in 1983 onwards in my NW England town.

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Akite · 29/08/2022 22:53

I feel exactly the same about my name too. I avoid introducing myself because it's not 'me'. I don't feel any connection to it at all. I'm also too old to be arsed changing it now.
mine is perfectly ordinary, I don't even have the excuse of it being 'unique'. It often gets suggested on here as a good, classic name. I loathe it though.

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SequinsandStilettos · 29/08/2022 22:54

Oof. Just been on an article with very frustrated lovely Welsh people, tweeting their exasperation. If it is Meinir, Sioned, Esyllt, Myrddin, Elliw, Lleucu or Delyth then apologies on behalf of us all, who would struggle in our ignorance Xx Dragon

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grafittiartist · 29/08/2022 22:58

Me too! Welsh name in England.
No one can say it, I hate spelling it out.
It's not even a nice sounding name.
But- having a nickname makes lots of things confusing. Accounts/ firms etc. it's easier just to use the formal name.

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Kione · 29/08/2022 23:00

Also, I worked with a Niamh at an international company and she would spell it Neve, which made things easier.

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