To resent my parents choice of name for me?

[Blaengwnfi]

This is a rant - apologies.

I’ve always hated my name.

No one can pronounce it. Not even my father or siblings. It was always read out incorrectly at school and the other kids would laugh at me. It gives me major anxiety having to introduce myself.

I use my middle name professionally but it doesn’t feel like “my” name. I feel so angry with my parents sometimes for burdening me with this name.

Parents - please think before giving your kid a weird or “unique” name! It could really mess them up…

Me too. New parents- please think of your kid in school and workplace before planting your vanity names on them.

I was given a very old fashioned name, it has never been popular. My Mum had a cousin with the same name and liked her name even though she wasn't very fond of her cousin.
My middle name is equally old fashioned and horrible as well.
Apparently my Mum wanted to give me a different name to all the Sharons and Traceys around at the time, I would rather have been called one of those and blended in more than standing out.

I hated my first name and stopped using it when I came back to the UK at the age of 14, and it was only a few years ago that I officially changed it, or got rid of it. My eldest sister still calls me by it which sounds really strange.

This is a good point of someone growing up with either a fashion name or weird name that we know may have consequences. It's hard to name a child but has to be suitable for a child, teen then an adult one day. Sometimes we name them after family but even they can admit their names aren't what they want grandkids to be called

I met a kid called Jawduhn the other day

Never had any that extreme, but did have a Shivone instead of Siobhan, who pronounced it the same as the latter.

I hate my name and go by my middle name for the easy stuff such as Tesco accounts and Facebook

But I will always be my first name !

if you change it you have to completely go for it

Are you just having a rant OP or does it really bother you as much as you say? If it does then you’re not too old, just do it. You have two choices, to change it via deed poll or if you cba with that from today, next week or next year tell everyone that you want to be called ’insert name here’ from now on. Make it happen, you don’t need to justify yourself to anyone. As for your family not being able to pronounce it that’s just ignorant unless they have a speech impediment as if they can’t pronounce it by now (let’s assume you’re 35) they’ve had long enough to master it even if you were named Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch

I hate my name too. It's a legitimate name - ie not made up by my parents, although it is more commonly used elsewhere in the world, which i have no connection to.

It's always pronounced incorrectly. I also go by my middle name at work, but I feel like a fraud using it. I feel your pain.

Ive got an unusual welsh. I love it.

“Give your daughters difficult names.
Names that command the full use of the tongue.
My name makes you want to tell me the truth.
My name does not allow me to trust anyone
who cannot pronounce it right.”

—Warsan Shire

This is exactly why my DH and I spent a lot of time thinking about names for our children. We wanted something that wasn’t widely used but at the same time a proper name without a bastardised spelling. I think we managed it.

Parents - please think before giving your kid a weird or “unique” name! It could really mess them up…

Well on the flip side I have a non English name that people often struggle to pronounce & is often read incorrectly. But very few people have laughed at me & I love it. I loved being the only one in school with my name & much preferred that to being Sophie C, Sophie M, etc. I find it makes me more memorable in interviews & life etc, I'd hate to have a bog standard name.

I do know one person who changed their name, original was Chloe. They hated it & went for something more unusual.

I wonder if it depends where you live & work? I'm a Londoner & honestly there were so many more unique names than mine at school & every work place, street I've lived on I've meant someone with a name I've never heard before but that's diversity for you.

Maybe she saw how you struggled? And hadn't realised before

@Blaengwnfi

Name changed for this as possibly outing.

I worry that I’ve done this to my DD11. She often complains that people mispronounce her name and 98% of her teachers say it wrong.

It’s not that unusual but isn’t common and turns out is one of those names that people just can’t get their head around. I genuinely had no idea that people would have such issues with it when I named her. I tried changing her name when she was little but no one else in the family (including DH) got on board with it.

It surprises me that so many posters on here don’t get why not having a proper identity matters to you. I totally understand it and, while I still love my DD’s name, I do wish I hadn’t burdened her with it. But even at 11 it’s too late to change it now and she wouldn’t feel it was her name.

It's a bit odd that your own father can't say your name right. I'm irish with an English dp, our son has an old Irish name and he can say it perfectly.

How are buddug and blodeuwedd pronounced.

I have a very classic name, DH has a very unusual first name, that is very posh sounding, since he started college he started to use a shorter version of his name, that is still usual but more people have heard of it.

Embrace it, do you really want to be another Amelia?

Zac Goldsmith’s ex wife was Scheherazade, she embraced it.

If I had been a registrar of births, I would have challenged those parents who give their children strange names or unusual spellings. The French used to have a list of approved names, only dropped as it presumably did not cover names of African or other heritage.

Even worse as in the OPs case if one of your parents cannot pronounce it.

I have a colleague who's child would have to choose her third middle name before it was a less unusual name. This kid is in for a world of pain and the parents just don't see it.

I was lucky - marriage and a change of surname sorted my "problem" out as it was a clash of names rather than the name itself.

however, by then my confidence was shot because I'd had many years of people taking the piss followed by years of assuming they were taking piss behind my back. I tried using my middle name but that wasn't "me" despite being my name.

If I had been a registrar of births, I would have challenged those parents who give their children strange names or unusual spellings.

How would you measure strange? @balalake

I’ve had a lifetime of spelling my name and then having to also spell out my surname when I got married. Even when people see decided off their own back to shorten my name there were variations.
It took a very long time to embrace my own name but now I couldn’t imagine anything else.
change it if you hate it that much but it will be hard to shake off because it will pop up in the most unexpected places and remind you.

It is nearer Bline-goon-vee (an approximation) . The village is Blaengwynfi

F is always a V sound. FF is an F sound, and is a separate letter

But that wouldn’t help the OP, as her name is an unusual Welsh name, and calling names from languages you don’t speak strange or worthy of challenge isn’t a good road to be on.

The problem with naming a child is that you don’t know how your child will feel about their names until it’s too late. You just have to make a decision based on your views and experiences and hope it’s right for your child. Personally, I have a very popular, classic name and I didn’t like having to be Toast X in every single situation as a grew up so I’ll choose unusual names for my children.