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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think there is no flattering swimwear for the larger lady

126 replies

MahMahMahMahCorona · 13/08/2022 15:47

I've scoured the Internet and I cannot find what I'm looking for.

Currently 9months into breastfeeding and 16 stone (down from 20 since birthing the baby, so that's a bonus).

Going on holiday next week and am in total denial about my size. Nothing looks right, nothing looks like it can cover all my sins so I anticipate hiding inside, beneath sarongs and towels, baking and perspiring for the entirety of the holiday.

DP suggestion? "Ask Mumsnet".

So I'm asking: where does a 16 stone breastfeeding large boobed lop-sided (baby only feeds from the right breast) large thigh'd large with an overhang mama, find flattering swimwear?

AIBU in saying the task is an impossible task?

If you've found this page in search of swimwear that has been tried and tested by fellow Mumsnet users, you might find our guide to the best swimsuits for women useful. Hope this helps! MNHQ

OP posts:
TooManyPJs · 13/08/2022 16:12

TooManyPJs · 13/08/2022 16:07

I wear a skirted swimsuit which is pretty flattering. Emphasises boobs, de-emphasises tummy.

Just to add it's one of the ones where the skirt bit starts under the boobs. So a swim dress effectively. Not where the skirt starts at the hips which wouldn't cover the tum.

Poppyseed14 · 13/08/2022 16:12

Debenhams online have some lovely swimdresses. And their delivery is super quick too with free returns if they don't suit you.

TooManyPJs · 13/08/2022 16:14

Surprised at all the people recommended a tankini. I look bloody terrible in a tankini. Presumably must depend on your shape and where you carry your fat.

Original poster
MahMahMahMahCorona · 13/08/2022 16:15

Wow wow wow thank you all so much for taking the time to respond. All these suggestions to work through - I've seen a PP mentioning big pants for a bikini (I don't think I could cope with a halter neck), I hadn't thought about that to be honest. My white thighs terrify me so I didn't want to scare anyone else. But I will have a look, certainly.

Thank you - just working my way through your replies and recommendations, you're all very kind.

OP posts:
Bindayagain · 13/08/2022 16:15

Not too keen on this pattern but that's the shape I mean

To think there is no flattering swimwear for the larger lady
FangsForTheMemory · 13/08/2022 16:16

DeborahVance · 13/08/2022 16:06

I've got this costume too, they do it every year. It's v flattering

Show quote history

me too! I look as nice in it as a size 22 can.

Original poster
MahMahMahMahCorona · 13/08/2022 16:16

SteveHarringtonsChestHair · 13/08/2022 16:06

I’m a size 18, wear a bikini and give no fucks. I buy the big pants as nobody needs to see my stomach, but I expose the bit between my waist and underboob. Then get a supportive bikini top, I like halter necks but they can Ache after a while so I usually untie the neck strap.

I keep a sarong handy for standing up, but tbh on holiday everyone else is too busy enjoying themselves to give one shiny shit about someone else’s thighs or jiggly bits.

Just enjoy the feeling of sun on your body and splashing in the water with your baby.

Where do you get your bikinis from, Steve?

OP posts:
Whowhatwherewhenwhynow · 13/08/2022 16:16

I have one of those swim suits with long arms (no legs) and a zip up the middle. Everyone I’ve seen wearing the looks nice and I guess you can zip down to feed? However might not be practical if you need a lot of breast support, but it is nice to have less shoulder to sun cream up!

I think sometimes people choose swim wear that covers a lot of their body And is really plain, thinking that’ll look best. However I think going to something with a beautiful colour or pattern you love and showing off an area of body you like with confidence often looks better.

whatever you go for I hope you have a fab time.

lostinabook · 13/08/2022 16:17

Simply Be or Sainsbury's very occasionally ASOS most you can just pop a boob out easily!
we are similar sizes though my 'baby' is 10! However I swim 6 times a week so go through cossies frequently

jessieminto · 13/08/2022 16:18

I'm a size 18 and have this one from Snag Tights. None of the models are 18, some are smaller, most are bigger. This swimsuit is perfect as the leg isn't too high and it covers everything I need it too while still looking nice.

snagtights.com/collections/swimsuits/products/swimwear-fortune-glory-suit

Original poster
MahMahMahMahCorona · 13/08/2022 16:19

ForfuckssakeEXHstopbeingatwat · 13/08/2022 16:08

I think it's important not to confusing "looks nice" with "slimming" or "flattering". My mum drives me bonkers with this. Her sole criteria for if someone or something looks good is if it's slimming. If it's a gorgeous colour and you feel comfortable in it, then it's flattering. Especially on holiday when it's hot, you need comfort above all else. Pack a couple of very floaty lightweight shirts or dresses for mooching about but please don't make yourself miserable looking for a holy grail of 2 oz of lycra that will somehow perform miracles. I've been there x

Thank you for the reality check: I've been body shamed so often by my own mother (no matter what weight I was) I feel very very nervous about going out in public without covering myself from top to toe. 😳

OP posts:
SlouchingTowardsBethlehemAgain · 13/08/2022 16:21

Around the pool no one cares what anyone else looks like. My upper arms would give you nightmares but no one seems to notice.

GeekyThings · 13/08/2022 16:21

MahMahMahMahCorona · 13/08/2022 16:15

Wow wow wow thank you all so much for taking the time to respond. All these suggestions to work through - I've seen a PP mentioning big pants for a bikini (I don't think I could cope with a halter neck), I hadn't thought about that to be honest. My white thighs terrify me so I didn't want to scare anyone else. But I will have a look, certainly.

Thank you - just working my way through your replies and recommendations, you're all very kind.

I moved onto leggings (just below the knee, although you get shorter ones) because I'm knock-kneed, which actually means I can injure myself wearing nothing at all on my thighs. And honestly, I'm fat, but I got compliments and people asking me where I got my swimsuit from! I just bought mine from Amazon, link below - they're were cheap, comfy, and they go with loads of different tops.

www.amazon.co.uk/Leggings-Boardshorts-Tankini-Swimwear-Surfing/dp/B096K1FYBJ?pd_rd_w=rXWNR&content-id=amzn1.sym.497d4c70-b5c1-4495-b6bd-715afe1a9b35&pf_rd_p=497d4c70-b5c1-4495-b6bd-715afe1a9b35&pf_rd_r=1CNXYR7CYPCHTBAC5W0E&pd_rd_wg=hQ4AN&pd_rd_r=6f96a6bb-6183-40b8-8a56-53be2ac51ebb&pd_rd_i=B096K1SJSX&psc=1&ref_=pd_bas_bia_rpt_ba_s_2_sc&th=1

Whowhatwherewhenwhynow · 13/08/2022 16:21

I recently bought this as part of my move to being more bold and I love it

To think there is no flattering swimwear for the larger lady
smelters · 13/08/2022 16:26

GeekyThings · 13/08/2022 15:53

I was going to post exactly this. I absolutely hate my legs and this combo has given me so much more confidence. I have these exact swim leggings and they are fab. I don't actually care what people think, it makes me feel more comfortable and so I can enjoy being in the water. Bonus of a tankini top is you can get longer length ones to cover tummy area. I wouldn't get anything with a swim dress style, they just float up in the water!

HipsterCoffeeShop · 13/08/2022 16:27

If it fits well it will be flattering.

Losing 4 stone is great OP.

Am on holiday currently and there's all shapes and sizes of women hanging round the pool.

It's too hot for anything except a bikini. Buy yourself some pretty kaftans and you can cover up when you need to.

AdamRyan · 13/08/2022 16:32

Molke?
molke.co.uk/collections/molke-swim

Or was going to suggest snag too

I just bought a boden bikini which fits great but I'm a bit smaller. They have shorts bottoms and appropriate tops imo

www.boden.co.uk/en-gb/corsica-v-neck-bikini-top-atlantic-ocean-abstract-petal/sty-s0146-dbl?cat=C2_S2_G17

AshGirl · 13/08/2022 16:33

I like Molke's swimwear and the bras are also amazingly comfortable and breastfeeding friendly.

molke.co.uk/collections/molke-swim

SteveHarringtonsChestHair · 13/08/2022 16:33

MahMahMahMahCorona · 13/08/2022 16:16

Where do you get your bikinis from, Steve?

Show quote history

Nowhere special - just Matalan or Sports Direct I think?! Most of them are a few years old. I’m sure you could get nicer ones from a proper bra shop.

AdamRyan · 13/08/2022 16:33

The great thing about that bikini top is that it isn't halter neck and also doesn't look like a bra

AshGirl · 13/08/2022 16:33

AdamRyan · 13/08/2022 16:32

Molke?
molke.co.uk/collections/molke-swim

Or was going to suggest snag too

I just bought a boden bikini which fits great but I'm a bit smaller. They have shorts bottoms and appropriate tops imo

www.boden.co.uk/en-gb/corsica-v-neck-bikini-top-atlantic-ocean-abstract-petal/sty-s0146-dbl?cat=C2_S2_G17

Snap!

StaunchMomma · 13/08/2022 16:34

I agree, OP. The body positivity thing has really ruined fat clothes for people who want to actually cover their lard up!

Most plus sized sites are now full of crop tops and high waisted jeans that you are apparently supposed to tuck a shirt into and proudly display your gunt to the world. No thanks!

As for swimwear - bikini and tankini sets galore!!! As feckin if!!

I wear this semi-dress thing I got off Amazon that covers most of my sins and is miraculously comfortable. I also keep something to put over it when I get out, like a cheap kaftan or something.

www.amazon.co.uk/Halterneck-Swimdress-Swimming-Swimwear-Boyshort/dp/B088WB4C4V/ref=sr_1_13?crid=81HL7HQZF1O4&keywords=swimsuit+with+dress&qid=1660404746&sprefix=swimsuit+with+dress%2Caps%2C86&sr=8-13

SummerSazz · 13/08/2022 16:37

StaunchMomma · 13/08/2022 16:34

I agree, OP. The body positivity thing has really ruined fat clothes for people who want to actually cover their lard up!

Most plus sized sites are now full of crop tops and high waisted jeans that you are apparently supposed to tuck a shirt into and proudly display your gunt to the world. No thanks!

As for swimwear - bikini and tankini sets galore!!! As feckin if!!

I wear this semi-dress thing I got off Amazon that covers most of my sins and is miraculously comfortable. I also keep something to put over it when I get out, like a cheap kaftan or something.

www.amazon.co.uk/Halterneck-Swimdress-Swimming-Swimwear-Boyshort/dp/B088WB4C4V/ref=sr_1_13?crid=81HL7HQZF1O4&keywords=swimsuit+with+dress&qid=1660404746&sprefix=swimsuit+with+dress%2Caps%2C86&sr=8-13

That's lovely @StaunchMomma

JenniferPlantain · 13/08/2022 16:39

LightLDN do amazing swimwear for all sizes.