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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I reported an aggressive Jehovahs Witness to the police….. AIBU?

173 replies

MistressoftheDarkSide · 22/07/2022 09:04

Long story short, my DP died in January after a three week illness - turns out his brain bleeds were caused by almost symptomless oesophageal cancer that had metastised to his lungs, liver and brain.

I’m still reeling but have no choice than to continue the retail business we started together to make ends meet - he had his own niche career and was well known locally- I have had a lot of support and although I feel as if life is utterly pointless I have family and friends who have also suffered so I try not to pile on the agony and pretend I’m more ok than I am (I’d love grief counselling but working full time makes it tricky).

My business is an alternative Gothic / witchy shop with lifestyle accessories because that was our lifestyle together.

Recently a young female Jehovah’s Witness - 25 - who was on our friends list on FB but who I don’t believe we ever met personally has kicked off because she claims we are Satanists. she doesn’t want to see Goth stuff on her feed and it’s wrong to promote our “Satanic beliefs” on the internet.

Actually we’re not Satanists (can’t believe I’m having to say that) and the social media I do is to promote our stock…..

She put up a comment on a business post that included the gem that God took my DP to punish him for his unGodly life, then it vanished before I could respond. So I didn’t do anything except have a vague moan, not naming her, on my personal feed.

She then started messaging me more of the same , told me I was possessed by the devil when I reacted very angrily (yeah, did get a bit feisty) and stupidly I engaged enough for her to tell me I’m going to hell, and I should hold my loved ones closer as their days would be numbered as God will punish me for my lifestyle and also that I will lose my business and everything cos…, God.

I’m a pretty tolerant person, but I saw red when she started this and did call her out publicly - my admittedly profane post was removed and I got a 24 hour ban.

I reported her to the police who may or may not make contact, but Victim support have been in touch, but what I really want is someone to have a word with her because:

if I was a different person I might have done something stupid - I’m angry and know everything she is spouting is offensive bollocks, but what if she targeted someone less robust? She claims (at the ripe old age of 25) to have saved 25 people from demonic possession….. is she targeting vulnerable people?

She sounds unhinged and may benefit from some intervention.

I know on one level I should not have engaged (over twice her age) but I don’t always have the capacity to think rationally especially around the subject of my DPs death, and implied “threats” to my future and the well-being of my family absolutely pushed my buttons.

The police have not yet made contact though I have given them my movements for three days as requested or they might phone?

AIBU?

Or am I just as bad as her?

OP posts:
MistressoftheDarkSide · 22/07/2022 12:50

I think Stephen Fry says it all really…..

Thank you for that clip x

OP posts:
DeusInAbsentia · 22/07/2022 12:54

Ask her how many wars and atrocities have been undertaken in the name of Satan vs the name of God, Allah or any other religious icon.

No, seriously, just block her. I love a good Gothic shop, Halloween is by far my favourite time of year.
I'm sorry for your loss. Flowers

Soubriquet · 22/07/2022 12:56

EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall · 22/07/2022 12:49

I love anything gothic!

You are no where near as bad as her! You are recently berieved I'm not surprised you lost it with her a bit.

I'm really sorry for your loss

Same. It’s just a shame it’s so expensive.

I have a list as long as my arm of crap I wanna buy but it’s just too much money

donquixotedelamancha · 22/07/2022 12:57

Hate to tell you this but JW is a Christian religion. Bible based to the extent that they take it literally.

That is not the definition of Christianity. I was contrasting Jaws with historic 'mainstream' Christianity.

Islam and a number of other religions have as much in common with Christianity as JWs- in the same way that Frozen draws a lot from the Ice Queen but is not the same fairy tale.

crwnhgow · 22/07/2022 12:57

Puzzledandpissedoff · 22/07/2022 11:49

Please can you point me to the 'hook' bits on the website I linked to?

I really don't want to derail on what's a thread of support for OP, but will risk saying that there isn't one on the website, since naturally enough this aims to be anodyne - and that may even be justified among the well intentioned, since good thoughts create good deeds and are to an extent a protection

But there's a subtext and associated risks here, which can be clearly seen by anyone who's studied the subject rather than assuming the public face to be the whole - something I'd be glad to discuss if you wanted to create a separate thread about it

So your slandering Satanism and Satanists is based off some vague "study" that you don't feel like expanding on?

User2145738790 · 22/07/2022 12:59

pointythings · 22/07/2022 12:42

@User2145738790 I doubt it, it's a US based international organisation and they're quite capable of coming up with their own (secular) ideals. I don't see what you're lolling at, unless you don't think treating people decently and taking care of our planet are things we should be doing.

If they weren't exempt from taxes would the organisation still "do good?"
I don't believe their sugar-coated homepage.

Blossomtoes · 22/07/2022 13:01

Christianity is an Abrahamic monotheistic religion based on the life and teachings of Jesus of Nazareth. JW is a Christian religion.

donquixotedelamancha · 22/07/2022 13:01

Christians and Muslims persecuting the followers of pagan religions probably didn't help.

Early Islam was very tolerant of other religions. Norse pagans did far more to attack Christianity than the other way around.

The main reason those two became successful is because they were associated with groups which were militarily and culturally successful and because they developed a narrative which was comprehensive, robust and persuasive.

pointythings · 22/07/2022 13:04

User2145738790 · 22/07/2022 12:59

If they weren't exempt from taxes would the organisation still "do good?"
I don't believe their sugar-coated homepage.

The Satanic Temple applied for tax exempt status on the basis that they are a church, which is a thing under US law. So do you think that if Christian churches didn't have tax exempt status they would still do good? If yes, why do you think it would be different for the Satanic Temple? And as they make clear, they are a secular organisation and not actual devil worshippers (unless you have some very solid evidence to the contrary, which I doubt you do).

You don't believe their homepage. That's fair enough - I don't believe the home pages of very many Christian organisations, because I know they are opposed to many of the things I believe in (LGBT rights, abortion and so on).

donquixotedelamancha · 22/07/2022 13:06

Christianity is an Abrahamic monotheistic religion based on the life and teachings of Jesus of Nazareth. JW is a Christian religion.

I find it odd that you didn't reply to my previous questions but have decided to argue about this instead.

I don't care where you draw the line about what is or is not Christianity, I was just making a point to a PP about one of the main ways JW differs from the religion that most people think of when you say Christianity.

GetThatHelmetOn · 22/07/2022 13:06

Sorry Op, didn’t RTFT in full, but as far as I am aware being goth is covered under protected characteristics so if she returns… just mention to the police you are being a victim of “hate crime” and perhaps that would get them of their arses.

In the meantime, go the extra mile and block her (if you only unfriend her, she still can see your public posts)

MistressoftheDarkSide · 22/07/2022 13:12

I do find it interesting that so much of the intolerance and injustice in this world seems to come from a religious perspective, which is why I can’t hang my hat anywhere spiritually - there’s no package that doesn’t have some form of intolerance woven in.

If I have a creed I try to live by it’s simply “and harm ye none” - not because some power or force tells me this, I just feel it intrinsically, more so with age and experience…..

I wouldn’t insult another’s beliefs in the normal run of things, but insult me first and as far as I’m concerned eye for an eye OT style may occur…. Not going to turn the other cheek and get slapped again…. A fair fight is another matter….

OP posts:
HairyToity · 22/07/2022 13:12

My cousin is a single dad. He has been since his children were 8 and 3. He is a very hands on dad. He works full time and my aunt and uncle do help lots, but not all the time.

Care was never ever a consideration.

HairyToity · 22/07/2022 13:13

Wrong thread

overthinkersanonnymus · 22/07/2022 13:13

I'd definitely be warning her that you've cast a spell on her so she better watch her back! Fuckin head case

donquixotedelamancha · 22/07/2022 13:20

I do find it interesting that so much of the intolerance and injustice in this world seems to come from a religious perspective, which is why I can’t hang my hat anywhere spiritually

Nah, humans can be dicks about anything. People moan about religious being the cause of war but the worst genocides have been Atheistic regimes and religious groups among the greatest victims.

The truth is conflict is about tribalism and power. Religion is just one difference among many which and be leveraged to dehumanise others until we think it's OK to hate them.

I'd definitely be warning her that you've cast a spell on her so she better watch her back!

I have to say, I think I'd be having hours of fun with stuff like this but the healthy choice is just to block and ignore.

EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall · 22/07/2022 13:21

Soubriquet · 22/07/2022 12:56

Same. It’s just a shame it’s so expensive.

I have a list as long as my arm of crap I wanna buy but it’s just too much money

Sane, although I've managed to pick up quite a few bits on vinted and I did treat myself to some really cool boots from emp recently

sashh · 22/07/2022 13:24

You did the right thing.

@GetThatHelmetOn has a point, but there is another one, she targeted you because of what SHE thought were your religious beliefs, that's a hate crime too.

Soubriquet · 22/07/2022 13:27

I love EMP. So much on there I want to buy but when something as simple as a hoodie costs £50, it makes me wince

HyggeandTea · 22/07/2022 13:29

I believe that a lot of people, atheist or religious, talk nonsense. However, as long as their beliefs are not causing harm, then it is not for me to declare them to be wrong. Who knows, I might be the wrong one here.

One of the wonderful things about social media is that you can block people, and virtually banish them from your life. You can literally switch them off and dismiss them.

She sounds extreme, and very tone deaf, but lots of people are like that if they think they are saving you. Not only religion, Covid vaccinations, for example, led to politicians openly calling for people to be segregated and punished; maybe they were right, maybe not, the point is some people are sold on the fact they are being cruel to be kind.

Personally, I try to be kind and I try not to press my beliefs on others. I do not like rudeness, and regardless of personal beliefs, this lady should have backed off.

I am sorry for your loss, and hope the future is better.

EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall · 22/07/2022 13:29

Same 😬 I bought my boots on pay in 3 from PayPal 🙈 vinted often have stuff on from emp though

Sorry op, bit of a derail there. Agree with everything you are saying about religion

RampantIvy · 22/07/2022 13:31

Why? Is theirs any different from any other religion in its basis in reality?
Or are you suggesting they are more likely to respond negatively?

What do you think @user1471447863?

DeusInAbsentia · 22/07/2022 13:33

I buy most of my stuff from Vinted tbh.
They tend to have the band shirts I look for or the oversized stripy jumpers. The only thing I couldn't find cheap recently has been my palladium boots which were a painful £80 but should last.

Nice to see other alternative MNetters!

ZenNudist · 22/07/2022 13:35

I said YABU but only because you should have ignored her and blocked her at the start.

JWs are nuts. I'm a church going Catholic and I'm pretty sure the ones I've met think I'm going to hell. Don't even ask me my views on hell but suffice to say God didn't "take" your dh as punishment.

I'm sorry for your loss.

Fluffycloudland77 · 22/07/2022 13:37

Soubriquet · 22/07/2022 09:12

I’m so sorry for your loss. Honestly, being a satanist is nothing compared to what some religions preach.

If I had to have a religion it would be Satanist.

I’d choose Judaism. Mainly for the food.