Estate agent bollocks or Booker worthy prose?

[ParentsandParents]

Came across this brilliant / terrible description of a house on Right Move.

An appealing property that catches the eye from the kerb, offering a heady mix of designer charm with modern practicality.....

and so on and on

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/120291311#/?channel=RES_BUY

Genius marketing or bilge?

@ErrolTheDragon absolutely agree with you, I love being outdoors and I'm going through some 💩 at the moment and have become a bit fixated on this sad fact we'll have to move coz divorce so that triggered it so sad you see it everywhere 😢

Nice enough house but I'm thinking that the roof tiles could potentially be an absolute horror to source in the future.

£1.1 million though? HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Got to love darn sarfs prices.

"a home that has a beautiful sense of order and attention to those details that make daily life straightforward."

what does this MEAN????
I also liked the bit about the 'keen eyed visitors'....you'd have to be pretty blind NOT to notice the flipping balcony jutting out from a house!

I also liked the bit about the 'keen eyed visitors'....you'd have to be pretty blind NOT to notice the flipping balcony jutting out from a house!
I'm not sure that it was a good idea to draw attention to it. I immediately wondered why someone would have a balcony on the front and then realised that it was because they have a north-facing garden. Should have kept quiet!

What a lovely house! I don't think it has much garden though.
The estate agent's write-up gave me toothache it was so sickly.

It is pretty, although I think the price is a bit optimistic for the location - what isn't mentioned in that vomit of prose is that it's on a busy main road.... And whilst the village is nice, there's actually not much there.