Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Cocaine use

204 replies

user1490969170 · 12/02/2022 18:34

I am 36 and don't use cocaine. Never have. Although none of my closest friends do, it has become common place in my wider group of friends and acquaintances. It's mainly used by the blokes recreationally. All family men. Often there wives don't know at all, or aren't aware of the extent.

Is this pretty normal? Am I just naive?

OP posts:
PosyBoo · 12/02/2022 20:03

@Lilylovetulips

I'm in my late 30s and have never used any deug, including cocaine.

However, I know of plenty of people my age who do on a regular basis. Most are middle class with kids and respectable jobs. I never understand it really. I also know of a couple of people who have died suddenly from regular cocaine use, usually when mixed with alcohol.

Also my ex husband was a coke addict and I never knew, genuinely had no clue. He hid it very well. I only found out after we split up that he had spent our wedding reception snorting coke in the toilets with his mates. I was obviously horrified.

I’m so pleased it’s not just me who was clueless to their nobhead partners drug use!! Luckily I never married him but he stole thousands from me to feed his habit and was just such a shitting human being. Clever though, as I had no idea at all for 4 years!! Can’t work out why other around who knew never told me till after we’d broken up though 🤷🏼‍♀️
thunderonlyhappenswhenits · 12/02/2022 20:03

Go the pub on a Saturday night and guarantee most in their are on it, especially the Middle Aged men who's wives are at home ! Averages around 40-50 a gram depending how good it is usually

Pixies74 · 12/02/2022 20:09

@Scarby9

Where do you all live? Are you in cities?

I genuinely know nobody who uses cocaine.

This!

I'm late 30s and admittedly live in a large village (but on the outskirts of a city) and know noone.. Don't know anyone who does it from my home town in same county either...

Okay, I have come across one person before, but it was 20 years ago in my gap-year job, they were late 20s.. Definitely not middle-class or 'respectable'.

Or maybe it is rife and I'm just viewed as too much of a goody two-shoes to be let in on the secret Grin

Caramelcap · 12/02/2022 20:10

@Oysterbabe

Personal choice, no different to drinking.

Are you taking the piss? Are you really that clueless about the murder, people trafficking and general pure fucking evil that surrounds the drugs trade? It utterly destroys lives. People just don't give a shit, a bit of fun for them so who cares.

In terms of the affects on them as a person. I actually see a lot more damage and destruction to personal health and families through use of alcohol.
Dyrene · 12/02/2022 20:12

I’m not aware of it in my social circle. My H describes the sales people at his work as all on coke though.

Personally, I think you may as well shoot a Central American in the head yourself if you’re going to do coke. Talk about an unethical supply chain.

VestaTilley · 12/02/2022 20:15

I don’t do it, never have, nor has DH.

I’ve got one friend (journalist Hmm) who does it. It’s one of the reasons why she’ll never be a Godmother to my children...

I think it’s a despicable thing to do, immoral to boot; it fuels violent crime in South America and elsewhere. The kind of people who take it must be complete bores.

The vast majority of our other friends and family never have done it, or done any drugs since I’ve known them, and I’ve known most of them since uni or our early twenties.

MizzFizz · 12/02/2022 20:16

I have never done it and neither had any of my friends for the longest time, then at some point an adjacent friendship group started casually using it and now a few of my child-free friends are using it fairly regularly during nights out (we're in our late 30s). None of them are massively high earners and I don't understand why they would be wasting their money like that... I have no interest in trying it (what if it's too fun?!) and am happy with having a drink or two here and there.

RagzRebooted · 12/02/2022 20:24

@Scarby9

Where do you all live? Are you in cities?

I genuinely know nobody who uses cocaine.

It's rife in villages! I know of several people in our (well off, south east) village who use it and I am sure there are many more. Lots in other villages I know of too. My cousin was dealing it for a while until she got into Crack, lost her kids and nearly died.

I used to take it Occasionally as a teenager but never bought it myself as its ridiculously overpriced and overrated and not as fun as much cheaper drugs like ecstasy. Also people on coke are twats and grumpy fuckers for days afterwards.

But yeah OP, it's everywhere. It's just people who don't do it often never see it as the people who are doing it tend to hang out others who do and so the groups don't overlap at the same time.

AuntMasha · 12/02/2022 20:24

The UNDOC World drug report has stated:

“Cocaine is likely to be the most problematic drug worldwide in terms of trafficking-related violence and second only to heroin in terms of negative health consequences and drug deaths.”

Babadook76 · 12/02/2022 20:29

@Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g obviously not children 🙄 the rest, yes

DogsAndGin · 12/02/2022 20:31

From my time living in London, I noticed that every new friend I made, and every new group of acquaintances I met - everyone does it London. But, yes, it is vile!! I do not miss London!

roarfeckingroarr · 12/02/2022 20:58

We all did lots in 20s and beginning of 30s. I stopped before having DS and won't again.

RedCandyApple · 12/02/2022 21:01

I’ve never used it and don’t know anyone who does

RedCandyApple · 12/02/2022 21:02

I live in London btw so not true everyone does it here I don’t!

Pixies74 · 12/02/2022 21:06

What is it that makes people grumpy afterwards? Is it like a hangover?

Mary46 · 12/02/2022 21:06

Its rampant in my sons age group he 20. Its scary u dont know side effects. I watched my dads organs shut down from stroke so it stayed with me how you can be effected. Im not into drugs myself

ManicPixie · 12/02/2022 21:12

I can’t imagine doing coke regularly in your 30s while looking after a family. The comedowns are exhausting.

Original poster
user1490969170 · 12/02/2022 21:15

@ManicPixie

I can’t imagine doing coke regularly in your 30s while looking after a family. The comedowns are exhausting.
I wonder if that's why it's predominantly blokes that seem to do it. They have partners at home who will look after the kids while they re recovering. Not sure if would work the other way around!
OP posts:
thunderonlyhappenswhenits · 12/02/2022 21:28

@Pixies74

What is it that makes people grumpy afterwards? Is it like a hangover?
Think you use up all your dopamine when on it so basically running on empty the next day, also you're knackered as you're more likely to stay up all night drinking the more you have. The comedown is called the horrors where I'm from
catfunk · 12/02/2022 21:30

Yea quite normal especially amongst the blokes where I grew up and where I live now (both 2 very different demographics)

extractorfactor · 12/02/2022 21:31

It needs to be legalised. It would be safer. It could be taxed. It would stop county lines. It would significantly reduce crime. Given many different authorities have been trying unsuccessfully to stop it since Victorian times (possibly earlier but I don't know much about the Georgians) I think legalising it would be more sensible.

Katie2017 · 12/02/2022 21:38

I only know one friend who started doing it early 20s (not sure if she still does as have lost touch), her bf got her into it. She said you have to be careful because it's very addictive and you feel really down the next day with a stuffed up nose. Didn't sound appealing AT ALL. I suffer with depression as it is I don't need to feel even worse than usual. Isn't the high really short as well?

I seem to remember Elton John used to warn all the up and coming boybands "whatever you do stay away from cocaine" and that was good enough advice for me!

Giraffesandbottoms · 12/02/2022 21:38

I don’t know anyone doing it in their 30s and I would judge people severely who do it when they have children etc. Plenty of people I knew did it in their 20s - everyone grew up and got jobs (except one guy actually who had a raging addiction and ended up getting fired). But then I also think it’s shit to get drunk on a regular basis when you have children and most people in the country seem to do that!

I absolutely agree with @MrsTerryPratchett

Giraffesandbottoms · 12/02/2022 21:41

I wonder if that's why it's predominantly blokes that seem to do it. They have partners at home who will look after the kids while they re recovering. Not sure if would work the other way around!

Plenty of mothers with raging hangovers looking after children up and down the country most days!

Bitcreepy · 12/02/2022 21:42

I don't know how rife it is among dh and my peers. I know some friends who did loads of drugs at uni and still had the odd line a few years ago at least. It isn't my thing at all. I don't even drink alcohol! Also the ethics of it are pretty terrible.

My dh has never tried it and I don't think he would do it.

I work in hospitality and it is pretty common among staff there, especially the younger ones but certainly a number of people in their late twenties, thirties and one in her forties still has the odd silly night out with drugs. It does seem to be common. Friends who work in finance and advertising have also said it's extremely common there too, so I don't think it's necessarily a blue collar thing