to ask for a realistic picture of menopause

[Happy36]

4 months ago I found out I had cancer. I have had treatment and the cancer is now in remission. As a result of treatment, my periods have stopped and I've started to go through menopause (without any peri menopause period). I'm 40.

What can I expect and what can I do to mitigate it?

Good news on the cancer remission

I've had
hot flushes
Brain fog
Sleep disturbance
Up in night for loo
Pain in joints

I take menopace and sage tabs

I tried hrt but got really fat so came off it
Weight back to normal now.

The herbals control nearly all symptoms except the bladder and the pain in my joints.

Back to docs tomz.

I had
Migraine style headaches
Warm flushes

I'm 62 now and my hair is thinner, my metabolism (and my appetite) has slowed, I need to regularly epilate my moustache.

Achy joints.
Tired, exhausted at times.
Lost my libido completely.
Massive swinging PMT.
Sweating badly.
BO, had to increase my deodorant to a really strong one.
Forgetting obvious words - really frustrating.
Sleep disturbance.
Lost hair at the beginning that never grew back.
Got fat, but always hungry.
Lost my ability to give a shit.

Flue like symptoms.
Vertigo.
Pains
Lack of energy
Grumpy
Lack of tolerance for ejits.
Hrt saved me made me fat but saved my sanity

Grandma - Lost my ability to give a shit.

Bloody hell, I need this to happen to me - doesn't sound like a bad side affect at all

(To anyone worried about HRT and weight gain, please take four seconds to google).

I have no post menopausal symptoms apart from facial hair.

Absence of fucks to give (see also shits)
Night sweats that were annoying but did subside.
Scary amount of hair fall - again, that did resolve but my hair feels ‘different’ now in texture and weight.
Weird random pains in knee and shoulder that were deeply annoying but, again, eventually sorted themselves out.

Are you able to take HRT or are you not able to because of the cancer?

Anxiety.

Feel slightly warmer than normal( I wouldn't call it hot flushes)

Donr take any medication for it

A level of general anxiety I have never experienced before but may be a result of pandemic and bereavement.

Loss of libido
Fatigue
Terrible joint pain
Bloating and retaining fluid
Brain fog.
Forgetting key words and misspelling things
Night sweats
Disturbed sleep due to peeing in night
Lack of tolerance for fuckwits

Apart from that not too bad! Congrats on remission x

This us a how long is a piece of string question as it’s very different from woman to woman. It has mostly impacted my mental health - no hot sweats etc as is so called “typical”

Well I'm 49, still having periods (with the odd rogue missed one) but hair has already thinned, memory is rubbish, libido isn't great, tummy is fat while eating less, alcohol tolerance is down... so I dread to think what it will be like when I'm actually menopausal. Sorry OP!

No symptoms at all here. We're all different.

@goose1964

I have no post menopausal symptoms apart from facial hair.

Same here, but I was quite hairy pre-menopause as well! I had none of other the symptoms listed on this thread.

My periods stopped at around 40 too and I always felt perhaps being younger made it easier. Hope you find it easy too OP, you've been through quite enough

I'm menopausal at 33 due to medical treatment, and I was expecting it to be awful.

However- I feel great. The mental health issues that have plagued me since my teens have basically gone completely, I have more energy and I'm not hungry all the time and have lost a stone without trying.

I've had some hot flushes, and the insomnia was awful for 6 months or so. And the not giving a fuck is real, and challenging with 3 small kids at home.

But overall much less awful than I thought it would be.

Waking up with headache and mild nausea most days. Feeling suddenly warm and nauseous but no flushing. Thinner hair, big belly, puffy face. My period just stopped suddenly, knees are very bad now, so stiff and big loss of flexibility

Well, for me it was hell on earth. I was having hot flushes every 5-10 minutes, non stop. I couldn’t function, couldn’t concentrate on anything else. It was jeopardising my job, my friendships, everything. I was so despairing in the end I counted them to relay to the GP just how awful it was. I stopped bothering when I got over 200 and the day hadn’t even finished.
Everything dried out, and I mean everything. Think of every bodily orifice you have and imagine it dry and sore. My eyes were actually the worst, but there were plenty of other contenders.
I had pretty much every other symptom described on here. Couldn’t sleep, couldn’t think, was snappy and short tempered, went off sex, started to get prolapses, hair fell out, skin dried up, joints got stiff, vision went weird and blurry. Total nightmare.

I know I was particularly unlucky, My mother had spent years telling me it was oh so easy and nothing to worry about, so it came as a real shock.

I went to the GP and pretty much demanded HRT, which I’ve been on for 4 years now. It was life changing. I’m going to fight to stay on it for as long as they will let me.

Menopause at the age of 40 is early, you need to talk to your doctor (not randoms on Mumsnet 😊) about whether you need to go on some sort of HRT, often it’s recommended for younger women due to the extra risks associated with early menopause. Love from a random on Mumsnet!

The initial symptoms of menopause are not the ones to worry about. Years down the line osteoporosis, vaginal atrophy, incontinence, prolapse etc., all the conditions associated with lack of oestrogen but which you rarely hear talked about start to come into play. I am on HRT for life, there’s no way I’m putting up with that shit when medical science has given us the means to avoid menopause altogether.

Really interesting to note that some people found HRT made them fat. I definitely put on weight with HRT and it didn't matter how much I dieted or exercised my weight stayed the same for 4 years.
Stopped HRT six weeks ago and have dropped nearly a stone with zero dietary changes.
That's too much of a coincidence to not be the effects of taking HRT.
Granted I'm getting a few hot flushes but being slim again is great. Plus my anxiety is massively improved.

Happy36 wishing you all the best

Happy36 I'm unfortunately in the same position as you after cancer treatment. My periods have stopped at 41. I've had a lot of hot flushes which seem to come and go without reason eg I'll have a week of waking up drenched several times a night and then it will abate for a bit.

I've pushed my oncologist on the issue as I don't want it brushed off as an insignificant side effect of treatment just because I've completed my family. They've said they'd give it 6 months post treatment to settle and then refer me to gynocology to have hormone levels checked and possibly hrt started. I've read that in some cancer patients HRT can kickstart the return of ovarian function.

It's one of the things I'm really bummed about.

Re HRT and weight gain, I’m on HRT now, started in June on a half dose and full dose from July. My sugar cravings went right down and energy levels up and so far I’ve lost about half a stone of my lockdown weight.

My other main symptoms were:
Crippling insomnia
Hot flushes
Brain fog
High anxiety levels (I struggle with this anyway but it was pretty bad)

And in peri, I had night sweats and itchiness/insect sensation too.

Also been on vaginal oestrogen pessaries for quite a while, which have sorted out much of the bladder issues and discomfort I was experiencing.