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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

The way my husband eats crisps

69 replies

Doodahtee · 01/07/2021 12:50

I am in the living room. Door shut. TV on.

He is in the dining room. Door shut. Watching something on his phone.

I can hear every crunch of his crisps.

OP posts:
Quickchangeartiste · 01/07/2021 12:52
  1. Do you have a patio ?
  2. Do you have a spade?

Job done

Doodahtee · 01/07/2021 12:53

@Quickchangeartiste 😂😂😂

OP posts:
WhyMeLord · 01/07/2021 12:54

He's a monster

idontlikealdi · 01/07/2021 12:54

Does he rustle the bag too. That sends me over the edge.

Doodahtee · 01/07/2021 12:55

@idontlikealdi

Rustle: crunch crunch crunch
Rustle: crunch crunch crunch
Rustle: crunch crunch crunch

OP posts:
Ocsetldil · 01/07/2021 12:56

Buy quieter crisps.

Doodahtee · 01/07/2021 12:57

@Ocsetldil like Wotsits. Good idea!

OP posts:
BeeyatchPlease · 01/07/2021 12:59

You have my full sympathies. I have to leave the room whenever DH eats crisps or an apple, it's deafening!

moonbedazzled · 01/07/2021 12:59

Rustling - give him a bowl to tip them in.
Crunching- tell him to suck them.

Could just eat some roast chicken crisps now.

Onairjunkie · 01/07/2021 13:00

Oh my Christ. I’d have to set him on fire. I cannot be dealing with that. It sets me on edge. When my baby eats, lip smacking is cute. When my husband does it, I want to beat him to death.

Before anyone lays into me for threatening violence and it not being ok to joke about it etc etc, I’m not joking. 😇

metalmutha · 01/07/2021 13:03

Leave the bastard

EKGEMS · 01/07/2021 13:08

I feel your pain! My husband makes so much noise when eating French fries-never knew it was even possible! He also makes all kinds of annoying noise putting his fingers in the paper container to pick them up and out-I've spoken to him multiple times and he still chomps and scratches! Makes my blood boil

TheYearOfSmallThings · 01/07/2021 13:10

I bet he is doing what I do when I'm eating crisps without witnesses. I try to crunch them for maximum volume. They taste better that way.

LadyPenelope68 · 01/07/2021 13:13

I’ve regularly thought about putting my husband under the patio when he’s eating cornflakes Angry. I feel your pain!

Missfelipe · 01/07/2021 13:15

My husband admits that he can’t hear the tv over the sound of his own crisp eating and yet it continues…

Yrevocsid · 01/07/2021 13:16

OMG my husband CRUNCHES HIS FUCKING ICE IN HIS DRINKS.

I literally get to the point every evening when i am saying "FFS will you just fucking stop it I can't stand it", and 5 mins later he's doing it again.

Angry
ElaborateSalad · 01/07/2021 13:17

How do you eat crisps without crunching? Are you suggesting he just suck them?

PJsEveryday · 01/07/2021 13:19

You have my deepest sympathies- I can't stNd the sound of my husband eating a banana or chewing gum. It gives me the rage!

HarebrightCedarmoon · 01/07/2021 13:23

Some people seem to crunch them with their mouths open, its horrific.

I have to pull DH up on the way he drinks anything from a can. SLUURRRP. You can tip a drink into your mouth without slurping!

CouldIhaveaword · 01/07/2021 13:29

I've been known to reach over and rip DH crisp bags up the side to cut down on the rustling. Never found a cure for crunching OR loud finger sucking afterwards.The full squelchy suck-kiss kind of thing.

TheMirrorofHerDreams · 01/07/2021 13:32

@Yrevocsid

OMG my husband CRUNCHES HIS FUCKING ICE IN HIS DRINKS.

I literally get to the point every evening when i am saying "FFS will you just fucking stop it I can't stand it", and 5 mins later he's doing it again.

Angry

Get the plastic cubes you can freeze to save your sanity? if not then a spot under the patio would be a clear second option.
RandomMess · 01/07/2021 13:41

You've just reminded me about the open mouth crisp water in the office, haven't missed that WFH!!

moonbedazzled · 01/07/2021 13:45

But the rustling and the crunching add to the joy of eating crisps. I even enjoy looking into the bag and shaking them round to find the crisp I want.

SometimesIFeedTheSparrows · 01/07/2021 13:45

My DH and our 3 sons ate ribs last night. With their hands. Lip smackin finger lickin good ribs.

I was 3 rooms away Grin

cricketmum84 · 01/07/2021 13:46

I feel your pain.

My husband eats his toast with no butter. Just dry.

And when he eats it sat next to me it sounds like a giant chewing rocks.

Pass me that spade!