I’m going to have to split up because his phrases irritate me

[LittleBlackCurlyHairs]

Bloke I’ve been seeing for 8 months. He says the weirdest phrases and says the strangest things I can’t get over my annoyance.

One of them is, he’ll yawn and then say “oh! I’m yawning well!”. Wtf does that even mean?? I’ve never heard it said before and he says it almost every day.
Another one is “we need to nip that in the bun” bun??!! I have told him that it’s bud but he carries on saying Bun. I find it annoying.

“Keep sure you do that” “keep sure to set your alarm” etc etc ... keep sure?!

Jellypeano on the pizza

There is other stuff too but relationship aside ... has anyone else heard of these sayings?? (Keep sure, yawning well etc)

Dumped a guy a decade ago for saying ‘two-shay’ in a text (correct context but OMG).

Dump him. Life is too short.

Why have you dated him for this long if you're so irritated by him and don't like the sex?
All jokes aside, I'd be pretty upset if someone wasted 8 months of my life and then dumped me for some trivial reason, like being annoyed by my phrases (and no I don't say any of the things you've listed, and yes they do sound a bit odd/annoying...but, you should've decided if it bothers you at the beginning, not after 8 months!)
Poor guy...just end it so he can find someone who actually likes him.

@RuffleCrow, that’s so weird! Whilst I was reading the OP I was picturing someone I used to know who drove me round the twist with his stupid mispronunciations and ‘quirky’ words.

He was a good ole Norfolk bor (as in "Hev Yew Gotta Loight Bor?) 😒😂

I used to date a guy who winked during sex.

For some reason this has tickled me the most!

Ok I'll admit one. I had a lovely chap who insisted on calling me "Milady"

Only in writing, so I never had to cringe in person but thankfully that fling flung its last for other reasons soon after.

Perhaps change jelly peano in to jelly penis and say it twice everytime he does, especially if other people are around. It might make him think a little about the value in using the orthodox words.

I've seen lots of families that adapt words into 'amusing' new variants and use them as in jokes. You'll have to decide what you can live with, what you need to 'nip in the bun' and what you can't bear. Good luck.

Haha I’d keep him for the laughter factor.

Also here to find out the sex phrases

I have a friend who says stuff like this. It's always repeated again and again, as well. Like if there is a smell of food anywhere in the vicinity, you can guarantee that he will sniff the air and go, "Ooh, I smell noms!"

EVERY TIME.

He has a lot of good qualities, but I do look at his wife sometimes and wonder how the actual fuck she manages to put up with it.

Why am I laughing so much at ‘yawning well’. You deserve a medal for putting up with this for so long OP.

The guy i dated between husbands referred to sex as "naughtiness" as in "Are you up for a bit of naughtiness tonight?!".....Errm, No thanks. He also went for a "comfort break" whenever he needed the toilet! The mind boggles on what sort of "comfort" he was getting from it!

If you're irritated now, you'll end up feeling murderous. Throw him back, there is someone out there who will find him endearing. Probably...

What kind of idiot stays so long with someone they find so annoying? Just release him back into the wild and jog on.

After food we've eaten and enjoyed he usually says "just what the Doctor ordered". Um no the Doctors I work for wouldn't have ordered you eat that because you're diabetic. Pisses me off every time. A thank you, that was lovely would suffice.

Oh my God, he needs to go. He sounds a bit dim. If he was being ironic then it's almost forgivable.

If it's bothered you this much now, imagine what it'll be like once you've been together years..

"I'm just off to the little boys room" killed it for my mate.

PMSL at 'comfort break'

Now, just to defend him a little bit, I have heard people say “ooh, you’re coughing well” when I have had a bad cold and am in the middle of a coughing fit. The standard response to this is “ha ha, yes I am.” With an inward eye roll to yourself. Or a

Could the yawn one be a variation on that?

(Is he from Nottingham?)

"Ooh, I smell noms!"
😫🤢

i smell noms reminds me of something Miranda would say on her show.
i have heard someone do this.but they have very severe ocd! and they have to write or not write certain ways and spelling too.

they would be killed on here for their grammar and spelling.

@BuzzShitbagBobbly I can attest to it very much NOT tickling me. I'm ashamed to admit I shagged him again before Xmas & that is how I remembered 🤢

My MIL does this. She is dyslexic so regularly reads new words wrong which is no problem. But 20 years on she still gets the names of my close relatives wrong, think Mary for Maria so I'm less forgiving than I used to be. My DH has started doing it too but the whole family (kids as well) shout him down, if he'd have done it when we first got together I'm not sure we'd have made it!

These are hilarious :D unfortunately I don't have any that I remember but I'm having an amazing time reading these.