I’m going to have to split up because his phrases irritate me

[LittleBlackCurlyHairs]

Bloke I’ve been seeing for 8 months. He says the weirdest phrases and says the strangest things I can’t get over my annoyance.

One of them is, he’ll yawn and then say “oh! I’m yawning well!”. Wtf does that even mean?? I’ve never heard it said before and he says it almost every day.
Another one is “we need to nip that in the bun” bun??!! I have told him that it’s bud but he carries on saying Bun. I find it annoying.

“Keep sure you do that” “keep sure to set your alarm” etc etc ... keep sure?!

Jellypeano on the pizza

There is other stuff too but relationship aside ... has anyone else heard of these sayings?? (Keep sure, yawning well etc)

None of this terrible man’s godawful phrases are Irish!

God almighty, OP. Have some standards! Ditch Mr Malaprop! He should have his language use licence revoked.

crustycrab ahh really? I've not heard it before though have heard 'cunt' instead of couldn't 😂

"quick!! It’s working!!!”

'Not for me it's not, bye'

😆

Ooh this had made me laugh! My ex-h used to say "hospickle" and "thery" instead of "very" and ask me if I wanted "slam dunkin'" (sex). So fucking annoying.

@wobblywinelover
My BF also overuses 'in any way, shape or form'! Makes me wince/shudder. Every single time. And I got a text from his mum today saying the exact same phrase so I know where he gets it from!
My friend says 'tret' instead of 'treated'. Might be South Yorkshire dialect but it's horrible (I'm from South Yorks too and I don't say it...)

I also dumped a guy for improper use of capital letters (he also said that he and the people in his block of flats were 'snobs' as satellite dishes were not allowed).

This thread is making me cry 😂 how on earth have you put up with this OP??

Noooooo!

Bin him beofe he utters the words “nom nom ‘

@LittleBlackCurlyHairs

Defo end it. Weirdo LOL!

I went out with someone once (way before DH) who I had sex with three times. When we started PIV sex, he would say 'ooh, it's in, it's in, I've got it in, it's there! Can you feel it, what's it feel like, can you feel it in there, it's in, it's in!'

I was with him for a month, and three times I shagged him. All three times he said the same shit.

Three times of hearing 'oooh, it's in, it's in, it's in!' was enough. I ghosted him after the third shag.

Another used to say, in a low, hoarse "sexy" way 'so deep, so deep within you'.

That actually made my skin crawl.

I have a friend who says "yeah, yeah, yeah" at the end of other people's sentences.
Every sentence.

So incredibly rude.

My ex once said, "You look radius!' And he always used to say "Ooo my guts are off!" whenever he had stomach ache. Made me 🤢 (not envy). He had to go.

My other half does this and comes out with some right howlers.

Hes not stupid, in fact hes pretty bright but he never did well in school as he is dyslexic and was forced to write with his right hand when hes naturally a leftie. As a result he has a slight stutter and mixes his words up. I cant stop laughing at him sometimes though.

I can put up with it, he is lovely

I was shagging a guy recently who had a small cock. Trying to do it from behind he said "nope, can't hit that sweet spot". He was nowhere near any fucking sweet spot - didn't even breach the flaps.

I have also encountered a "call me daddy" idiot. Did. Not. Shag. Him.

@ghostmous3 really shit what forcing someone to switch hands can do - thankfully now that is recognised.

@Tighnabruaich

Another used to say, in a low, hoarse "sexy" way... 'so deep, so deep within you.'

OMG! I don't even know which emoji this deserves.

It could be any one of these!!! 🤮 😂😲 😐

I did my Masters in Linguistics & tonight was revisiting the idea of a PhD - can you imagine if I proposed my research into the sexual ideolect of those men MNers shagged.

Bloody hell OP, the phrases were horrific but the technical problems on top of that makes the whole situation unbearable! I can only assume you've stayed with him this long because he has some redeeming qualities? Time to move on now.

I can't stop laughing picturing him suddenly getting a random erection and chasing you around the sofa shouting QUICK IT'S WORKING!!

@QueenOfOversharing really? Your turn of phrase is as off putting as some of these 🤢

@ILikePaperHats tret is treat. Not treated.

@crustycrab 😂

Quite queen 🤢

Not spoken as we only kept in touch via FB but my ex BIL would refer to his DD on FB as "me ickle gurl" or "me pweshus ickle gurl" . He could spell and communicate perfectly well, but for reasons best known to himself didnt in reference to his 10 year old DD who must have been mortified.

Could have met him, chose not to.

@crustycrab

I'm amused that you would question whether I have that qualification based on how offensive you find my turn of phrase. Perhaps I should use asterisks 🤷🏼‍♀️

For the love of christ tell us more of his phrases