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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to go to Australia for the weekend?!

920 replies

HufflepuffHarpy · 07/07/2019 07:16

My best friend (male if relevant) is getting married in the autumn. I'm in the UK (where we both grew up) he now lives in Australia.

I desperately want to go to the wedding.

It will cost £1000 for the flight plus accomodation etc over there which is in no way small money.

I have 4DC so would be asking my parents (very hands on babysitters, have had them for me and DH to go on holiday etc) to have the DC (all under 10) while DH is at work.

I would leave on a thursday AM flight and get back tuesday pm. SO literally fly in for the wedding, the day after and then back home.

Am I being totally crazy to consider this?! (Haven't actually asked DH yet!!)

OP posts:
altiara · 07/07/2019 07:19

I think it sounds crazy!

LenoVentura · 07/07/2019 07:20

Leaving aside the cost because I'm assuming you can afford it, of course it's crazy, but so what? JFDI.

CareBear50 · 07/07/2019 07:21

Tricky one! I now live back in UK after living in aus and NZ for best part of twenty years. Apart from expense.....will you really get to enjoy it, as the jetlag is a killer?! If jetlag was not a factor of say 'go for it' though.

Original poster
HufflepuffHarpy · 07/07/2019 07:22

i can afford it in that i would have to 'borrow' it from our savings and pay it back over the coming year.

OP posts:
MeakTiger · 07/07/2019 07:22

Slightly but I would if I really wanted to go and couldn’t get any extra time than that. If parents were willing I would try and go a few days earlier or return later but if they couldn’t then yes I’d just go for the wedding.

Caveats are can you afford it (if £1,000 is acceptable to you that’s fine) and how does distance travel impact you (I happily sleep on planes and jump around time zones will no effect, some people need time to acclimatise).

Original poster
HufflepuffHarpy · 07/07/2019 07:22

carebear yes i'm wondering if i will be able to cope with the jet lag - i like my sleep!!

Anyone ever done something like this?!

OP posts:
wellingtonsandwaffles · 07/07/2019 07:23

What if there were delays to the flights out? Have you factored in time to still make it? Does sound crazy but if you have the money why not?! If the grandparents are great babysitters could you stay a bit longer?

DownUdderer · 07/07/2019 07:23

No way! The total journey would be longer than the time in Australia! You won’t get much face to face time with the groom either.

HicDraconis · 07/07/2019 07:24

I think it’s doable depending on how well you fly and how much you like airports. I live in NZ and often fly out Friday, arriving Saturday to spend the weekend with family, then attend a 2-3 day course in London and leave the UK Thursday night, coming back home Saturday. It’s tiring, and that’s spending 6 days in the UK to just about get into the timezone.

My best friend flew out to NZ for 4 days for my 40th which was lovely. Again, doable but tiring

Will you be going straight back to work? Suggest you ask the GP for some melatonin to sleep on the flight, or a low dose of steroids for your first couple of mornings back to try and combat the jet lag.

BikeRunSki · 07/07/2019 07:24

Webcam?
Live broadcast in FB?

KatherineJaneway · 07/07/2019 07:24

It's too much.

Original poster
HufflepuffHarpy · 07/07/2019 07:24

meak the short visit is because it will obviously put a lot of pressure on my DH and parents with the children (I am a SAHM) so dont want to go for longer than i have to for that reason. plus every extra day costs more in accomodation etc.

OP posts:
Pipandmum · 07/07/2019 07:24

Are you good at sleeping in planes? Will you be able to take a day off after you come back?
My husband used to do those kind of trips all the time for work (once flew to NY just for lunch). Sounds like you are up for it so go book that flight!

Bluegrass · 07/07/2019 07:24

I know at least two people who’ve done that, another who went for only a day or two more. None of them expressed any regrets!

Myfoolishboatisleaning · 07/07/2019 07:25

How long did you go on holiday for before? Why wouldn’t you just go for longer? Use other babysitters if needed. Or DH? They are his kids too.

ittakes2 · 07/07/2019 07:25

It's not crazy at all. Lots of people who have family this far away do the same thing. One thing with weddings - if you are really close the person and you miss the wedding its not something you can ever take back. Weddings usually have this wonderful loved up feel and being part of that is something that will further help cement your friendship. £1k to travel to and from Oz plus accomodation is alot but its also very cheap for a trip to Oz.

Original poster
HufflepuffHarpy · 07/07/2019 07:26

hic i love airports! and travel fine, not my favourite occupation but it doesn't bother me.

I struggle a bit when not enough sleep but surely adrenaline will help?

bike wedding on a beach, in a dodgy signal area - live feed not practical

OP posts:
echt · 07/07/2019 07:26

You will be jet lagged during the wedding. Jet lag is far worse flying to Australia from the UK than vice versa

TokyoSushi · 07/07/2019 07:26

Go!!

DownUdderer · 07/07/2019 07:26

The last time my parents flew out here, to Australia for a visit their luggage took ages to come out, probably because they checked in super early. And they missed their train, so I would be worried about delays in your shoes.

Dyrne · 07/07/2019 07:27

Have you ever flown to Australia before?

As someone who’s been to NZ a fair bit, the flight alone is an absolute killer - 24 hours of travelling (plus stopover) means you end up a complete dehydrated zombie by the end of it.

The jetlag is also completely sapping - not just something you can ‘power through’ while feeling a bit tired, it takes a good couple of days to adjust.

In all likelihood you’ll spend the wedding feeling shattered and manage to power through to about 8pm before you fall asleep - and that is already accounting for wedding excitement/happiness sustaining you through that long! You would also only manage to speak to your friend for a few minutes as he’d have to speak/spend time with all his other guests as well.

And that’s completely putting aside the cost aspect of it.

WhyTho · 07/07/2019 07:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
HufflepuffHarpy · 07/07/2019 07:29

myfoolish i know no-one else over there and obviously dont want to cramp their honemoon time!! I just would love to see my best friend get married. Staying longer would feel like a 'jolly' and i wouldnt choose to do a jolly like that. Yes they are DHs kids, he is a very hands on father but he has no leave left to use this year and would be juggling a high pressure job with ferrying kids etc. and whilst my parents are great and very able to look after DC it is of course tiring for them and i dont want to take the mick.

OP posts:
HicDraconis · 07/07/2019 07:29

Go for it. Melatonin to sleep on the flights and low dose steroids at either end to get your diurnal cycle into sync faster.

DarklyDreamingDexter · 07/07/2019 07:29

My brother did this once. Went to Australia and back for the weekend. I think it's utter madness myself, but to each his own. He had the benefit of flying first class so had one of those bed things you get on luxury long haul. The thought of sitting in a standard airline seat for the best part of 24 hours each way sounds horrific to me.

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