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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Mumsnet is blowing my mind

78 replies

starsparkle08 · 08/03/2019 17:48

Literally blowing my mind and getting me thinking about so many different topics/ different opinions etc so much so I feel I have a mini debate in my head over everything now 😂
Do you find this to ?
Which topics / discussions have really spoken to you ?

OP posts:

newtlover · 08/03/2019 17:50

I know, protestant traybakes, whatever next???

RuggyPeg · 22/03/2019 09:43

Oh god, so many. I have an extensive education, worked in many different jobs, including senior management, lived all over the country, met so many different people and yet, I feel like my mind has been broadened the most by Mumsnet. The feminist boards have awakened my inner feminist, the relationship boards have opened my eyes to the extent of dysfunctional, abusive relationships and men out there and AIBU has made me cry laughing at times. It should be prescribed on the NHS.

BellMcEnd · 22/03/2019 09:46

I was just thinking the same thing this morning! I’ve learned loads from MN. I think the biggest thing for me is understanding different viewpoints, love a bit of AIBU in particular.

Brilliantidiot · 22/03/2019 10:22

MN made me realise that I was in a financially and emotionally abusive relationship, that was starting to turn violent - and what to do to get out.
I didn't post but sadly many women have had the same experience I read as much as I could and it opened my eyes and helped me a lot.
It also helped me cope with the aftermath and digging into the reasons why I didn't see the huge red flags.
I've had many a lightbulb moment since when reading pov from other people, that have made me take on a different point of view.
Also learned some practical stuff along the way too!

juneau · 22/03/2019 10:25

MN has opened my eyes to many other viewpoints. I think whoever we are, whatever we do, wherever we live, we're all in our own little bubble to a large extent. MN is a free for all, so you read about dilemmas and lives and experiences that aren't anything like your own. It's made me question a lot of things I took for granted.

SconesandTea · 22/03/2019 11:03

Me too! I came here looking at egg freezing and I have learned so much! Really opened my eyes to lots of things. Love the no nonsense approach. How to get it more widely known to non mums?

mbosnz · 22/03/2019 11:22

Mumsnet is helping me navigate life in the UK - although I'm scared stiff to do anything now, in the fear that I might inadvertently commit a gross breach of manners, or unwitting cause grave offence!

Bookworm01 · 22/03/2019 11:25

The feminist boards opened my eyes and educated me.

Pigeonpies · 22/03/2019 11:33

It's hard not to hate all men and be on constant suspicion when reading the relationship boards!

At times, I've found myself doubting everything, or looking for 'red flags' that don't exist. I find that side a bit destructive and have had to remind myself to look on objectively.

On the other hand, I love a good debate and enjoy reading other view points about current affairs. So I keep on coming back for that :)

AIBUtopickanyoldname · 22/03/2019 11:34

Do you know what I love most about MN? It’s that so many people (men and the male media mainly) dismiss it as a ‘sewing circle for bored mums’, when actually I think it’s one of the most radical, grassroots platforms around. So many intelligent women coming together to discuss ideas, shine a light on all the patriarchal bullshit, empower each other through shared knowledge. The only reason we’re still getting away with it is because it’s called ‘Mumsnet’. If it was called ‘Womensnet’ it would have been targeted and either shut down or ruined by incels and MRAs years ago.

ShartGoblin · 22/03/2019 11:39

I came here as a result of trying to find information on whether my implant could be causing mental health issues and found a really long thread where people described a lot of my symptoms. Mumsnet made me realise that my brain might not be as messed up as I thought it was and I have now gone hormone free and I'm monitoring myself. I feel better and I no longer believe my life will end in suicide. I'll always be grateful to this site for that.

I stayed because, although I don't have children yet, there is so much support here outside of being a mum and I've read so much about what can go wrong that I feel ready to become a mother soon and I feel confident and armed with the realities and legalities of motherhood.

HepzibahHumbug · 22/03/2019 11:45

AIBUtochooseanyoldname
yes! THIS!

theredjellybean · 22/03/2019 11:52

The trans issues.. I had no idea and now a very vocal gc individual.
Love the book recommendations.. Brilliant people over on book threads.. You just post asking for a recommendation of a certain genre and five mins later you have a year's reading list.

JingsMahBucket · 22/03/2019 11:58

@AIBUtopickanyoldname I’m kind of shocked at how much MN is derisively dismisses in UK media. It’s such a weird old kind of misogyny that I can’t believe they don’t realize they’re doing. “Oh look at all those hens clucking over there. Tsk tsk.”

(Don’t get me wrong, MN can be toxic but it shouldn’t be dismissed wholesale.)

HomoHeinekenensis · 22/03/2019 12:00

Just don't Google blue waffle disease or dragon butter.

That was a rookie mistake when I joined.

Disfordarkchocolate · 22/03/2019 12:01

It's my outside at the moment. What's surprised me is the amount of bad behaviour some people put up with because they have no self-worth, how much love and support is here if you ask for it and how much money some people think is normal. It's like seeing into a different world, and that is never a bad thing.

MrsFogi · 22/03/2019 12:03

I know!!! I came here about 15 years ago for advice about a missed miscarriage and now appear to be a gender critical radical feminist having arrived at the feminist boards after taking the scenic route of the pregnancy, childcare, housekeeping, style and beauty, education etc etc boards.

badlydrawnperson · 22/03/2019 12:04

It should be prescribed on the NHS
Far too addictive

drunkenflamingo2 · 22/03/2019 12:06

All of the above but also to keep the whole duvet set inside one of the pillowcases. Changed my life literally!

Also credit Mumsnet with how well the kiddo goes to sleep and sleeps through which has saved our sanity. Learnt all of those techniques here. I spent most of my awful pregnancy posting here and got loads of support. Made a couple of really good friends who I haven't met in RL yet.

MillicentMartha · 22/03/2019 12:08

It's such a great resource for parents with DC with SN as well. Just so long as you avoid mentioning SN on AIBU.

Threewheeler1 · 22/03/2019 12:08

The humour. It's the one place that has me laughing out loud.
Also agree re all the topics. Loads of stuff I'd never really considered before as it didn't feature in my life.
Realising what some women go through every day and watching as other women share their experiences, offer advice and show that they care about what's happening to the poster. That solidarity often gives me a lump in my throat.

StealthNinjaMum · 22/03/2019 12:12

I agree. I love mumsnet. I have lost 5 stone on diet threads (and largely kept it off), learnt about style and beauty, sought advice about Christmas in May!, bought zoflora and Birds Eye, decluttered my house and enjoyed many a parking thread...

but it's the relationships board and feminism chat board that have really opened my eyes to the crap that women face. I often recommend it to acquaintances who I don't know well enough to give frank advice to and hope they come here.

AIBUtopickanyoldname · 22/03/2019 12:20

I honestly believe the relationships and feminism boards will change the world.

Bananasinpyjamas11 · 22/03/2019 12:22

I came on here as a step mum looking for advice, quite a few years ago, and although the responses were brutal, I did find over time that reading about other people’s experiences was such a relief! I wasn’t the only one!

You do sometimes need a tough skin, and sometimes it’s awful to see vulnerable people post for the first time and be shockingly torn apart, I think there are still enough really wise and articulate people who can say stuff that is amazingly helpful. I’ve still got a few phrases in my head that have steered me through some very tough life experiences. Kids, SN issues, relationship breakdowns. So grateful to some posters here.

Now I use more forums, from the difficult to the fun!

MoltenLasagne · 22/03/2019 12:25

The amazing thing about Mumsnet is that it brings together all of our stories so we can see how common some of our experiences are and realise that it's not just us on our own.

With the truly monumental stuff, such as the treatment of women in labour and after birth, or heck even the presence of Bounty on postnatal wards, it's a form of consciousness raising that defined old school political activism and enables us to spot patterns and raise our voices.

I will be forever thankful to this place for introducing me to Lundy Bancroft "Why does he do that?", the shark cage analogy about recovering from abuse and the use of grey rock technique. I've pointed many women here under the guise of great recipes / interesting tips for getting your child to sleep etc so that their partners don't clock on whilst knowing it's a safe space for them to talk about their experiences.

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