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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be livid how dolphins are portrayed compared to how they are?

666 replies

Otherwize · 06/10/2018 23:48

I am angry and sick and tired of how dolphins try and make out they are nice and friendly and cute when they are anything but. They are one of the most aggressive species in the animal kingdom, regularly involved in GANG RAPES of other dolphins that sometimes goes on for days, they also kill their OWN children so that the mother pays more attention to her husband dolphin so he can have sex with her without her being distracted by her child and they also are aggressive to humans when nobody is looking (I.e in the sea when nobody is around, not when they have an audience like at a sea world centre) But everyone says “aww dolphins are so cute and so friendly” but their not.

I think it’s because they look like they are always smiling and laughing that people think they are cute, but to me they look like they have evil eyes and cackling rather than laughing. People say alligators and crocodiles and snakes are evil what about dolphins? People only see the tame ones that like to show off to humans and do tricks and let us swim with them and stroke them and think all dolphins are like that but the ones in the wild are a different matter altogether.

Plus, people say that dolphins are clever because they use clicks to communicate with each other. Has nobody stopped to think that they may be clicking and conspiring amongst themselves?

I’m actually fuming, only because I just got back from someone showing holiday pics and they were going on and on about the dolphins and how they were so cute and I told them dolphins aren’t cute and they are dangerous and would they swim with and pet crocodiles? They Didn’t get why it was the same but any animal can turn against you and I have even saw footage of a dolphin purposely try to drown a human and drag them underwater. AND they also kill other sea baby animals and play volleyball with them, they don’t even eat them or are threatened by them, they just do it for a laugh. Why are they seen as friendly animals?

OP posts:
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QuackPorridgeBacon · 07/10/2018 12:28

This thread is funny and you do seem really passionate op but you are also correct. They are nasty bastards. They will circle a female dolphin and separate her baby from her then kill the baby by attacking it and then will gang rape the female. How awful must that be, it’s not a one off it does happen regularly. I do like the look of them though and think they are cute. My nans bathroom was full of dolphins growing up and when I did learn about their behaviours in the wild, I was a little shocked.

PillowOfSociety · 07/10/2018 12:31

“Has anyone pointed out yet that dolphins used to be land animals? They only sidled off into the sea pretty recently!”

And we used to be sea creatures. Now I know why we evolved.

PillowOfSociety · 07/10/2018 12:33

“My nans bathroom was full of dolphins growing up”

Shock
Figgygal · 07/10/2018 12:35

Why is this showing as an add on this thread GrinConfusedShock

AIBU to be livid how dolphins are portrayed compared to how they are?
Underpressureidiot · 07/10/2018 12:37

OP this is the best thing I’ve ever read, I was in tears reading the first post out to my boyfriend. So funny 😂😂 but you are totally right. Also don’t feed ducks bread, it’s terrible for them!

MorningsEleven · 07/10/2018 12:40

@QuackPorridgeBacon

How big was your Nan's bathtub?

QuackPorridgeBacon · 07/10/2018 12:40

PillowOfSociety I’ve realised how that can be read. They weren’t real dolphins, thankfully, given the dangers. Grin They were stickers, on tiles everywhere and anything like toothbrush holders etc would have dolphins on them. Even the fucking light switch was of a dolphin, the string ones. She put it on the string herself. Toilet seat cover things even had dolphins lol

TheFaerieQueene · 07/10/2018 12:40

For those who hate ducks

GabriellaMontez · 07/10/2018 12:40

Yanbu.

Is there a link to a petition I can sign?

QuackPorridgeBacon · 07/10/2018 12:41

Figgygal$m It’s the conspiracy of conspiring dolphins. Shock

QuackPorridgeBacon · 07/10/2018 12:42

MorningsEleven Pretty big, think she could get three kids in there all squashed up to bath.

Armchairanarchist · 07/10/2018 12:50

Bread is bad for ducks. Given what we now know should we only feed Hovis to males or just the ones behaving badly?

picklemepopcorn · 07/10/2018 12:50

This thread is actually getting better. Stunning.

picklemepopcorn · 07/10/2018 12:51

Oh, and has no one mentioned the kangaroos? Going ta it so hard the females neck can get broken, but it doesn't stop him trying to carry on, oh no!

NameChangeMagee · 07/10/2018 12:51

Thank you so much for this thread OP! I really needed the laugh today! 😂😂😂

ChorleyFMcominginyourears · 07/10/2018 12:54

This has to go into classics it's amazing!! Fucking dolphins gang raping and pillaging like pirates! I very rarely cry laugh but this thread has got me 😂😂😂😂😂😂

QuackPorridgeBacon · 07/10/2018 12:54

picklemepopcorn Fuck...

Bejazzled · 07/10/2018 12:57

Livid about dolphins
😂🤣😂🤣

Howlongtillbedtime · 07/10/2018 12:58

rabbitty I may well be your friend but if I'm not then I would definitely be your friends friend! She sounds very smart and sensible Grin

Livingtothefull · 07/10/2018 12:58

Thanks Op, I was feeling a little despondent today but no more after reading this. Can it please go in MN Classics?

Urbanbeetler · 07/10/2018 13:14

www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/world/2018/sep/27/seal-slaps-kayaker-face-octopus-new-zealand

If you think Dolphins are bad, have a look at the dual brutality of this...

Poisondartfrog · 07/10/2018 14:26

As there’s been no answer to my question asking if dolphins are psychic, have x ray vision or have been brushing up on their anatomy betwixt gang rape and murdering, I’m going with the last one. They must have waterproof iPods (scuse the pun).

Lweji · 07/10/2018 14:31

Thank got for praying mantises and black widows to restore the male - female fuckwittery balance.

CaptainMonteith · 07/10/2018 14:43

They are not that clever. I have never seen one, for example, knit a jumper or change the battery in a watch.

ChipsAndKetchup · 07/10/2018 14:46

Did the dolphins vote for Brexit?