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AIBU?

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Original poster

To ask for help with breastfeeding

75 replies

GKite · 09/08/2018 23:02

Okay I know I'm not BU but desperate for some advice. Had csection on 8th, trying to BF and feeling like a massive failure. I've had about an hours sleep and I'm getting more miserable.
Sometimes she latches fine but will be off under 10 minutes, sometimes she doesn't want to latch and the more she screams the more worked up I get. She's just had 4 minutes on my breast and now I feel like my nipple is on fire.
Is there anything I can do to ease this? I'm dreading leaving the hospital where I'll have no support

OP posts:
Cheby · 09/08/2018 23:07

Are you still in hospital?

I’ve been there; c section and struggling to establish feeding. It’s really tough, but it’s so worth it in the end.

garethsouthgatesmrs · 09/08/2018 23:07

Congratulations!! i didnt have a c section but my nipples felt the same for the first few days. Everytime he latched it was like the sharpest pain for the first few seconds. Lansinoh nipple cream is your friend it works really quickly.

There should be support once you leave the hospital, the midwife will visit on the first day and you will have contact details for other professionals. Tell the midiwfe in the hospital that you would like a bit of extra support and get all the advice you can.

Sorry to say the hour's sleep is normal for the first couple of days. It really is fairly short lived though. It gets better quickly.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 09/08/2018 23:08

You poor thing. It is really tough at the start. They do feed little and often. Having a section makes it more difficult. It can get much much better. I’m no expert (but am mixed feeding 15m old dd) and would recommend:
-Lanisoh on nipples after every feed

  • paragon gauze if you’re cracked/bleeding
  • Finding one position that works and trying to master it (lying down is a life saver)
  • seeing a breastfeeding expert. I didn’t have much confidence in any of the midwives I saw apart from one
  • checking for tongue tie.
Cheby · 09/08/2018 23:10

Ah sorry, I see you are. Ask for some support while you’re there. They should have HCAs who can help you with every feed during the night, and in the morning ask to see an infant feeding person for some good face to face advice.

Before you leave hospital, ask where the local breastfeeding support groups are, and see if you can get your partner to take you to those as often as possible, it’s worth it for the moral support, the tea and biscuits and a reason to get out of the house.

You should have support from your community midwives once at home, especially if you’re having teething troubles with feeding. If you feel you aren’t being supported then ask them for more, it’s their job!

You might find things easier at home; postnatal wards are probably the worst environment to try to establish feeding. It’s hot, noisy, no one is sleeping well and you’re not in your own bed.

LonelyStranger · 09/08/2018 23:11

Before leaving the hospital please find all the local breastfeeding support groups.
My local children’s centre provides support and the lovely ladies come out to you.
If you can, and feel it will be worth it, find a lactation consultant too, they’re wonderful and look out for everything, provide brilliant guidance and help.
Sorry I can’t be more helpful, both of mine had to be fed expressed milk via bottles (one was prem other one had tongue tie).
Best of luck

garethsouthgatesmrs · 09/08/2018 23:14

a breastfeeding pillow is fab too while they are tiny, it helps you get positioning right.

InTheRoseGarden · 09/08/2018 23:14

Your nipples will be sore for the first couple of weeks, especially at the start of a feed. That is totally normal.

If she doesn’t want to latch then stop trying and wait until she has calmed down.

It is so important to get a good latch. A bad latch will make your nipples sore. Make sure you know what a good latch looks and feels like. You want your baby to take a big mouthful of boob, mostly from below the nipple with the nipple tucking in at the very top of her mouth.

Pengggwn · 09/08/2018 23:15

It's only 9th! She may not be getting enough milk yet but that's normal. It can take a while to come through.

I used lots of lansinoh.

Bobbiepin · 09/08/2018 23:16

Oh love, cut yourself some slack, it can take a while to settle in especially after a section. Try to get the latch right and don't be afraid to adjust LO's mouth to alter it once they are on (less painful than relatching). If you have it right the pain will subside eventually and over time will stop hurting completely but if the latch is too shallow it'll continue to hurt and do damage to your nipples. Lanisol is your friend, slather it on and don't let your nipples dry. YouTube biological nurturing too, that's good in the early days. And get yourself some chocolate. Congratulations!

Twistofanxiety · 09/08/2018 23:17

Also had C-section and really good advice from the hospital.

  1. kangaroo snuggling (sit with baby next to your skin under your shirt) as can help with milk supply.
  2. aim for the baby's nose with your nipple - this helps with getting the nipple at the top of baby's mouth
  3. for those ladies with big breasts, hold the baby under your arm and curl them round so they can latch on from the side Hope you find some of that helpful.
Thankfuckitsfriday1 · 09/08/2018 23:19

Have they said baby has a good latch? They should come round and pretty much watch your feed to see if the latch is right and you can ask for help if it’s not.
Otherwise call the midwife tomorrow and ask for breastfeeding drop in.

Both my kids had lipstick latch and my nipples got cracked, bled and were very sore but we got through it and still feed now. It will be sore, they aren’t used to be suckled on so often.

Newborns have tiny stomachs and breastfeeding is hard work for them. My son fed roughly every half an hour-hour for around a week then every hour ect. Make sure the midwife is weighing the to make sure they gain weight.

When they go to latch shove your whole nipple in as far back into their mouth as you can. And google cluster feeding so your prepared for that too.

InTheRoseGarden · 09/08/2018 23:20

And don’t feel like a failure! What you’ve described sounds normal. Feed her often. You don’t need to wait until she cries and latching is harder when they’re hungry and upset.

Thankfuckitsfriday1 · 09/08/2018 23:20

They will keep you in Hospital until your happy with feeding (max in our area is 4 days)

Spilledmycoffee · 09/08/2018 23:21

Congratulations! I breastfed after a c section too. It's so difficult because its a struggle to move and get comfy, never mind while holding a baby that you're also trying to breastfeed. We worked it out in the end. Tried a few techniques but to be honest I think it was ultimitely time and practise that did it.

I know how painful it is though when its not going right. It's worth getting them to check for a tongue tie just in case. And deifinelty access any specialists they have available.

Have you heard the technique where you line up baby's nose with your nipple when you're trying to get them to latch? I found that one worked best for me.

Good luck!

applesisapple5 · 09/08/2018 23:22

Practical tip for latching; aim your nipple for the roof of baby's mouth and wait til she has a big wide mouth before aiming.
If you press your fingers just above your nipple to make it point upwards that might help. I even said 'big wide' out loud as I was doing the movement.
Always bring baby's head to your breast, hold gently the back of the neck not the back of the head.
Her head on one hand, the other hand pressed just above your nipple then gently guide and time it with the 'big wide mouth' movement.

Don't worry, it's all practice, you're doing really well I'm sure!

garethsouthgatesmrs · 09/08/2018 23:24

Sorry to comment again but I just thought you may not know this - milk doesn't 'come in' for up to 3 days so it may seem like the baby keeps latching and pulling off and you will convince yourself there is a problem. It is just the way the baby 'trains' your body to produce the right milk supply. It may be more difficult for milk to come in after a c section as well.

By day 3/4 things will settle down, it may take less time than that but thats why baby initially loses weight and should reach birth weight again by day 10.

The first few days are really tough but once you make it to day 3 you will start tp see baby latching properly

applesisapple5 · 09/08/2018 23:24

It's totally natural and normal for her to feed for short times, the first few days are really for you and her to practice latching on, it's how it's meant to work, so don't worry about that.

hallygore · 09/08/2018 23:26

Congratulations!

I hope I'm helpful, I'm a peer supporter. First of all providing she's got lots of wet and pooey nappies I wouldn't worry about her feeding little and often. Their tummy is about the size of a walnut so it's pretty normal. As for the pain has anyone other than the midwife looked at the latch? If not it might be worth asking them if they have an infant feeding team who can pop in and see you. It might just be a case of trying a different position. I know all 3 of my local trusts do.

The early days are really really hard but finding good support is really important. The hospital will have information on local organisations, as will your health visitor and community midwife. Every woman there has been through it and they'll reassure you no end. Some organisations have people who can visit you at home so you are not alone. There are Facebook groups as well. Definitely worth looking up :)

Wishing you all the best. The early days are so hard but someone once said to me as long as they are fed and cared for then you are coping.

fc301 · 09/08/2018 23:29

Didn't want to read and run. Also don't want to be negative but I had 3 c-sections & my milk never came in. Just something to hear in mind at 3-7 days.
All the very best. You care about your baby getting the absolute best, so you will be a wonderful mummy. The important thing is MILK, however you can provide it 💐

Patienceofatoddler · 09/08/2018 23:33

Congratulations!

You've had some amazing advice from here.

I won't repeat it but just a huge well done - the first few weeks establishing feeding is the worst BUT it's so so so much easier in 6-8 weeks time baby knows what there doing, your not as saw and you can just feed whenever and wherever you are on demand.

Wishing you the very best on this new journey Thanks

mavydoes · 09/08/2018 23:42

Hi lass

I had my son 5 days ago and only have JUST got BF established and first few days were formula so I ensured he was fed etc.

I have big boobs so a struggle for me was positioning- I sat on my couch, got a thick and thin pillow, laid him on it and while supporting his neck raised him to the nipple while I supported my boob- latch made.

The midwives should defo be able to help with this or a NCT BF class and support.

I've done some photos for you- hopefully that may help a bit?
Don't feel like you have failed as you haven't- it's taken us a few days and we still struggle but keeping calm and baby relaxed is key!

Mollywobbles82 · 09/08/2018 23:47

Early days are so so tough. Ignore anyone who says it should be painless if you're doing it right. It does end up that way but it takes some getting used to. You can't put too much lasinoh on! I pumped for some feeds with both my newborns to give my poor nipples a break when it became unbearable. You're doing an amazing job, and it truly does get easier. Keep at it. Good luck!

Original poster
GKite · 10/08/2018 01:52

Oh I just remembered she hasn't been changed since about 3.30pm is that normal? She's bone dry
I feel like my milk is coming in, my left boob in particular has started going hard and I'm dripping constantly in the last hour

OP posts:
Original poster
GKite · 10/08/2018 01:55

I checked out those photos pp, when she's on I can see more of my boob under her mouth? Omg does that even make sense Confused I'm so tired.
The part around the nipple, I can definitely see when she's on

OP posts:
Original poster
GKite · 10/08/2018 02:04

She's on again and making sucky sounds, I thought that meant she's on wrong?
I genuinely feel like she's biting down as supposed to sucking.
I don't think this is for me Sad

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