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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIB an oversensitive whiner?

77 replies

SayImADreamer · 18/05/2018 08:00

Been with BF nearly 2 years, live together, im currently away on holiday and im pissed off because I would have thought he could send me some pics of him or my cats whilst im away.
We have been catching up by text everyday "what you been upto" etc but once upon a time he would have sent a few pics, either of his face (lol) or my cats (i love my cats with a raging passion and also get a bit unnecessarily worried about them when im away - dont judge).

Hes not doing that this time and its pissing me off/making me sad.

Its less the not doing it and more the change from previous times.

Am i being a whiny little madam or would you be fucked off too?

OP posts:
LoopyLou1981 · 18/05/2018 08:02

I’d expect my dh to send photo of our kids to me if I was away. If your cats are your babies then I can why you’d want photos x

LoopyLou1981 · 18/05/2018 08:03

*can see why

thatwhichwecallarose · 18/05/2018 08:04

Have you asked him to send pictures? It wouldn’t hurt him to send them if you’ve asked but he’s not a mind reader.

And yes he might have done before but that’s the way relationships go. I don’t think it’s an issue.

Cath2907 · 18/05/2018 08:04

You are being unreasonable!!!!

BasinHaircut · 18/05/2018 08:04

I think you need to get a grip!

Sorry!

BrandNewHouse · 18/05/2018 08:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KittyVonCatsworth · 18/05/2018 08:05

Can you just ask him to send you some photos? I think you’re overthinking this and possibly are being a little over sensitive.

Treaclespongeandcustard · 18/05/2018 08:05

Sorry op, I think YABU. You're away on holiday, he's at home - I know where I'd rather be! Enjoy your holiday and ASK for pictures if it's bothering you that much.

Amanduh · 18/05/2018 08:06

Oh ffs yes yabu.

LifeBeginsAtGin · 18/05/2018 08:08

you are a whiny madam!

Why on earth would he send photos of cats? You aren't in the first throws of a romance anymore.

BTW, dogs are better than catsWink

Mulberry72 · 18/05/2018 08:08

Sorry OP but YABU!

A grip would be my recommendation!

Strugglingtodomybest · 18/05/2018 08:09

Yabu. Just get on with your holiday!

DinoSn0re · 18/05/2018 08:10

If this was all I had to worry about I would be a very happy Dino. Relationships change, people change, if he’s overall a good and caring partner, and you’ve presumably been happy to book a holiday and go away trusting him to take good care of the cats, then you’re being picky and controlling IMO, and your time would be better spent enjoying yourself. My husband doesn’t text often, and only sends photos if I specifically ask him to, but I trust that he’s doing a good job of looking after our DC and pets and I know he’s not that bothered about using his phone, and will just contact me as and when he needs to. Everyone texts more at the start of a relationship and most of the time it tails off, that’s just life.

StuntBottom · 18/05/2018 08:10

This is why I hate today's dependence on phones and constant communications. It used to be perfectly normal to have one phone call home a day when away (and that would be a really brief one if you were calling from an expensive hotel phone). Constant updates and pictures are a bit unnecessary. If it bothers you, ask him for a couple of pictures a day, but don't spoil your holiday by dwelling on it. You're there to enjoy yourself!

Original poster
SayImADreamer · 18/05/2018 08:11

@thatwhichwecallarose
@LifeBeginsAtGin
"The way relationships go..."
"Not in the first throes of romance anymore..."

This is the part im struggling with, i dont see it as being that difficult to keep that feeling going, sure it takes a little more effort but its not difficult. I dont see why just because its not brand new anymore you cant still make an effort! Confused

OP posts:
Original poster
SayImADreamer · 18/05/2018 08:13

@DinoSn0re
But i dont want it to tail off! I want it to be romantic forever! Im sorry but im struggling with this aspect in our relationship generally, im finding it difficult to let go of that

OP posts:
Rozzzzzalmost35 · 18/05/2018 08:14

Maybe he's busy?

TwitterQueen1 · 18/05/2018 08:15

Whiny Madam Wink

You're away on HOLIDAY and you're complaining about your BF not being a mindreader. If you want a photo try asking for one.

thatwhichwecallarose · 18/05/2018 08:15

Look at it this way...

The first time you went away he felt the need to message you lots and send pictures. I think since then you’ve become more secure. So although he wants to message you he doesn’t feel he has to constantly bombard you with pictures etc!

If you want pictures just ask!!

Original poster
SayImADreamer · 18/05/2018 08:16

@TwitterQueen1
Yeah but once upon a time i wouldnt have had to ask!!!!

OP posts:
Cynara · 18/05/2018 08:18

Whiny madam, I'm afraid. It's not as though he's not keeping in touch, he's been texting you. If you want photos, ask!

clockworklime · 18/05/2018 08:18

Oh dear.

LTB, as who needs someone with such weak mind-reading skills.

Talcott2007 · 18/05/2018 08:19

Have you sent him any pictures? You do sound very melodramatic!

Shoxfordian · 18/05/2018 08:20

Enjoy your holiday and stop worrying about ridiculous things. Yabu.

NewPapaGuinea · 18/05/2018 08:23

Have you whined to him about it?

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