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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be irritated by DD!!!

76 replies

donners312 · 01/02/2018 21:20

My DD has just said she wants to see her DF so she can get her christmas present of a makeup palette worth £50.

He won't have got it, he won't come and see her and he pays fuck all for her!!

I literally feel like saying i'll give you £50 for makeup and you can go and live with him and see how far you get.

Ungrateful and hurtful little so and so.

I know I A!BU! But feel so worn down and fed up!!

OP posts:
yorkshireyummymummy · 01/02/2018 21:22

Why do you think your DD is ungrateful and hurtful for wanting to see her Dad?
She obviously hasn’t seen him since before Christmas.

Cath2907 · 01/02/2018 21:24

Sounds like m you should be pissed at, not her!

Cath2907 · 01/02/2018 21:24

Him not m!

Leeds2 · 01/02/2018 21:26

I would let her go and see him. And collect her Christmas present (or not, as the case may be).

TieGrr · 01/02/2018 21:26

Jesus. So he doesn't care about her and now you're angry with her too.

Littlemissamy · 01/02/2018 21:26

Oh my, a child wants to see her father.

His refusal to pay you is between you guys, it’s nothing to do with her!

Allthewaves · 01/02/2018 21:26

I get it op. Kids can be ungrateful and selfish but we love them even when we want to strangle them

MissMouseMcPhee · 01/02/2018 21:27

Why are you so angry with your child? Of course she wants to see her dad. Of course she wants his gifts. Why is she ungrateful? I'm very confused as to why your anger is directed at her and not her neglectful dad.

Original poster
donners312 · 01/02/2018 21:27

She never see's him he does nothing for her. He doesn't come and see them (she has sibling) or financially support them.

I suppose i feel hurt that she could be bought for £50 and i feel if you just want a £50 present i will give you that and you can bugger off !!

Like i say i know IABU!! I am just knackered and fed up today. and fed up doing everything and she takes all her teenage stuff out on me whilst he does fuck all and she still wants to see him (albeit for present - that she wouldn't actually get)

OP posts:
Myddognearlyatethedeliveryman · 01/02/2018 21:27

Will never forget the Christmas ex told ds he had bought him a phone.
He sent him home with the box. .
It was a Lynx set..
Same year other ds x 2 got cheques that bounced..
Unfortunately sometimes dc need to find out for themselves the level of twatery you have been dealing with.

MissMouseMcPhee · 01/02/2018 21:28

What about wanting to see her dad is ungrateful and selfish?

PoppiesAreYellow · 01/02/2018 21:28

Er wow you have a dreadful attitude.

Original poster
donners312 · 01/02/2018 21:28

I am more than angry at her Father.

OP posts:
user1488397844 · 01/02/2018 21:28

YABU.

If he doesn't have it she will find that out for herself. I hardly think it makes her ungrateful towards you to want a gift, I assume she has been promised, from her father.

This is a very odd way of thinking and I feel a bit sorry for your DD who has done nothing wrong.

Maybe you should seek help for these feelings.

billybagpuss · 01/02/2018 21:28

Let her go, if he's got it, great. If as you suspect he hasn't, valuable lesson learnt.

She's not being ungrateful to you, she just wants a dad that gives a shit and it sounds like she's going to be bitterly disappointed.

Hugs to you, it can't be easy x

Snowysky20009 · 01/02/2018 21:30

It's her dad not matter what at the end of the day. Poor kid sounds like she's getting it from both sides.

MissMouseMcPhee · 01/02/2018 21:30

Maybe the present is an excuse to see him. How likely is she to say that she just wants to see her dad- especially if you react like this. Maybe saying she wants to go for the gift is just the bravado of a wee girl who wants to see her dad. It's not fair on her for you to be angry about this.... she will have picked it up.

Original poster
donners312 · 01/02/2018 21:31

yes you are all right.

I will have to suck it up and be the adult!!

OP posts:
Original poster
donners312 · 01/02/2018 21:33

Just FYI though we are not talking good guy caring Dad here.

OP posts:
MyBrilliantDisguise · 01/02/2018 21:33

Is it Urban Decay? It could be that she's told her friends she's getting it and now she hasn't got it and feels bad. I feel for her. Don't take it personally - she has a crap father and has to deal with it. That's tough.

user1488397844 · 01/02/2018 21:34

Your anger is misplaced.

PoppiesAreYellow · 01/02/2018 21:34

Just FYI though we are not talking good guy caring Dad here.

Sure but that's hardly her fault.

Original poster
donners312 · 01/02/2018 21:35

no you are right and she is a good girl really i feel bad for venting!

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 01/02/2018 21:36

Don't feel bad for venting.

But do put the anger where it belongs in future. Thanks

BrutusMcDogface · 01/02/2018 21:37

How old is she? I know how it feels to have an absent father that doesn't give a shit, but it's only as an adult that I've realised how hard it must have been for my mum to deal with, too Flowers

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