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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I accept I’m being judgey but I can’t help it!!

92 replies

BifsWif · 20/01/2018 19:53

A friend has just posted a picture of her spoon feeding her baby what looks to be rusk mixed with milk or baby porridge. The baby is 4 and a half weeks old.

All the comments are supportive and ‘you know your baby best’ and I’m just like Shock.

HE’S FOUR WEEKS OLD.

I was going to comment, but there’s no point is there? Better to come and rant to some randoms on the internet instead.

OP posts:
MyBrilliantDisguise · 20/01/2018 19:54

If you feel you can't say something to her, you need to speak to her health visitor asap. It's very dangerous what she's doing.

gamerchick · 20/01/2018 19:54

You should. Baby is too young to stomach that stuff.

People are thick.

Notasperfectasallothermners · 20/01/2018 19:54

Sheer madness.

Wolfiefan · 20/01/2018 19:55

Don't pull her up on her parenting on a public post. Can you PM or send her a link to the recommended age for weaning?

MyBrilliantDisguise · 20/01/2018 19:55

Could you send her a link to this NHS advice page?

stuffstuffeverywhere · 20/01/2018 19:56

Say something. The woman is a nutter. Why be friends with someone that stupid anyway?

user1471459936 · 20/01/2018 19:58

Isn't there a danger of too much salt? Definitely say something to her privately.

QueenUnicorn · 20/01/2018 19:58

I cant stand the "I know my baby better than years of scientific research". No, you don't.

Tika77 · 20/01/2018 19:58

I have probably lost friends over this, but have commented on baby being very loosely strapped into car seat with a massive coat on. It bothered me, I sent a private message to mum. Never got a reply but I hope it stuck.

Original poster
BifsWif · 20/01/2018 19:58

She’s an old school friend, I didn’t realise she was this insane.

I don’t think she’d take notice of anything I said, her post was very much ‘don’t care what people think, I know baby best and milk just isn’t enough for him’ etc.

Is speaking to the HV really something I should do?

OP posts:
Ilovecoleslaw · 20/01/2018 19:59

ShockShockShock

C0untDucku1a · 20/01/2018 20:00

‘Milk just isnt enough for him’ at 4 weeks old means ‘shit formula is expensive and all babies do is drink, sleep and poo.’

VitriolicMuse · 20/01/2018 20:01

You really need to say something. Fuck what everyone else says, they’re just as stupid as she is. 4 weeks old is absolutely mental, she’s probably just looking for ways to make the baby sleep through the night Hmm

tiredybear · 20/01/2018 20:02

yes, you really really should speak to the HV.
That poor baby. It will be filling the baby up, but not giving them the calories and vitamins etc that it needs. This could potentially affect the babies normal growth and develoment. Nutrition at this age is so important and has such far reaching affects for the rest of its life.

JeansAndANiceTop · 20/01/2018 20:03

She’s a fucking idiot.
And needs telling.
Politely though.

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 20/01/2018 20:03

I'm not sure you can "know best" with a scant 4 weeks experience

PinkAvocado · 20/01/2018 20:03

I would contact the HV team. She doesn’t know best and it could cause harm.

stuffstuffeverywhere · 20/01/2018 20:10

Screenshot the post and sent it to HV.

You could probably stand to lose this idiot from your life anyway

IHaveBrilloHair · 20/01/2018 20:10

It's highly unlikely he's swallowing much at that age.
Stay around, be supportive, suggest extra water with the food.
She's got her insane cheerleaders so if you go against them she'll shut you out.
It doesn't make her a bad mother either, just an ill informed one, gently help if you can.

JaneEyre70 · 20/01/2018 20:12

My cousin was giving her month old baby formula in her last bottle of the evening mixed with baby rice, as her mum had told her that's what she did with her. You can't fix stupid, sadly.

Darkbendis · 20/01/2018 20:13

Suggest extra water with the food?? For a 4 week old baby????

The only thing a baby needs at this age is milk, either breast milk or formula, not water or porridge or any other sort of food.

Darkbendis · 20/01/2018 20:14

I would try and contact the health visitor, if contacting her and giving her the correct info didn't help.

Cornettoninja · 20/01/2018 20:15

Isn't there a hungry baby formula? Could you suggest that?

EssentialHummus · 20/01/2018 20:17

What dark said. Just PM here and link to the NHS guidelines. God knows what's going through her head - could be issues with BFing and she's reluctant to give formula so is going off on one.

DreamyMcDreamy · 20/01/2018 20:19

Read that a 4 months at first and was going to say that's not too bad, as recommended guidelines when 14 year old was weaning was 4 months.
Must have changed to 6 months around the time 10 year old was born, as did to 6 months then.
4 WEEKS though? YANBU, that's far too early, the baby's system won't be developed enough.
Don't know how you'd say something without coming across as a judgy know it all though!
To whoever said screenshot and send to the HV - that's awful, definitely don't that.Way to make a new mum feel like shit/paranoid/ at a time they'll be full of hormones and getting to grips with being a mum! Hmm
You might not like her methods, but to report to hv for something like that.... no.

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