To be upset with my DM

[SoftKittySillyKitty]

For calling my beloved cat a large rat?!
Cat is tiny (although adult) and grey - and admittedly looks somewhat rat-like when she sits in a certain position.

But DM has a phobia of rodents and refuses to come round unless the cat is shut in another room.

AIBU to say no way. Love me, love my cat?

How often is she at your home? Is it really that big a deal to put your cat in another room while she's there. Your mother is under no obligation to love your cat.

I would tell her to get over it, it's the cats home, why should your little lady be pushed into another room, which she may see as a punishment, I don't think your DM needs to love your cat, but to accept it will be there, yes.

I think YABU. Your mum is far more important than a cat and there's no harm in shutting it away while she visits.

"Love me, love my cat" is ridiculous. Just because someone you like has chosen to have a pet, doesn't mean you have to like said animal too.

Agree what whattodo. We have a dog and one of my friends is scared of it she just doesn't like dogs and mine in particular. Dog goes out to its bed when she is over. She doesn't harm my dog, dog doesn't care and i get to see my friend who i love. I'd die for my mum so not sure i would reevaulate our relationship based on the fact that we have different taste in petsmum / cat. Mum / cat. I mean..... seriously? How old are you OP?

Picture please.

I would feel the same as your mum about a pet that looks like something I had a phobia of and could freely walk over to me. Love me love my cat is ridiculous. I bet there are plenty of other friends/ family who feel the same but just havent said anything.

I've lurked around for ages but finally joined for this and the cfn thread.

My thoughts are this, my dogs and cats live here, this is their home
My friends/family don't have to love them, but they will not slag on them or make demands upon them in MY home.
I have a SIL that doesn't like other living things, and pitches a great fuss, well darling...guess you won't be coming over
I guess this is partially because I like my pets 1000 fold more than I enjoy most people. But honestly, don't be rude about someone's pets

Having said that, if there is a genuine fear, I will attempt to accommodate. I'm not a complete monster

Also, another thought
It's a cat
Not a rodent
She needs to get a grip

A phobia by definition is an irrational fear over which she has no control. Even you admit it looks like a rat. Put it in another room- that's the decent thing to do

Alltheprettydoggies With your attitude I bet your SIL is jumping for joy that she has an excuse not to visit you.

Your mum sounds ridiculously over dramatic.

I wouldn't move the pet even if it was an actual rat but it's not it's a cat!

YANBU

If my friend wanted me to lock my dog up then we would have to make other arrangements because this house is his house and he's not being locked up, full stop.

It's an odd attitude to have, to refuse to be in the same room as your cat because it looks like a rat, she knows it isn't one! But still, why worry about it, just keep your cat in another room fgs!

My DH is allergic to dogs, my DSis used to have a lovely Labrador Retriever, she used to keep her out of the way when we visited. It's no big deal.

Sorry. I should have put "lighthearted" in the title.

Of course I'm not going to stop my mum coming round because of the cat. But I was a bit cross that she called my gorgeous cat a rat!

Photo to show she looks NOTHING like a rat! But she is camera shy

This is why I'm so glad I know very few people with pets (and the ones I do know that have pets aren't as ridiculously precious about them as half the posters here ).

pets aren't as ridiculously precious about them as half the posters here

If you don't want to treat your animals like we do, thats fine there's no judgement from me.

But please do not try to belittle those of us who actually love and respect our animals as much as we do.

My dog means more to me than most people. He has been there for me through mental and physical illness and kept me from doing stupid things. He spent half his life locked in a room alone. I'll be damned if I'm locking him away because someone can't cope with him - other plans can be made.

My dad calls my cat rat-cat. I think he does it to wind me up, she's nothing like a rat!

The locking in the room wasn't by me btw, I adopted him.

Really?!! My dad once said to my PFP (precious first Persian) "come here you stunted little rat" I said "what did you just call her" he came back with " come here you lovely little cat" I was not in the slighted bit offended as I know he was joking and he absolutely adores cats. He used to be very put out that they wouldn't come to him for fuss.

I also have a phobia of rodents but I think your mum is being a bit silly as it's definitely a cat not a rodent.

But please do not try to belittle those of us who actually love and respect our animals as much as we do.

I don't have pets. However the few people I know who do have pets love them too, they just don't treat them like humans, put them above actual humans and family/friends in particular and recognise that at the end of the day, they are simply an animal.

That is one gorgeous cat OP!

Do you want to see your mum or do you want to play psychological games with her over your cat?

Pick one.