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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be upset with my DM

81 replies

SoftKittySillyKitty · 31/08/2017 02:54

For calling my beloved cat a large rat?!
Cat is tiny (although adult) and grey - and admittedly looks somewhat rat-like when she sits in a certain position.

But DM has a phobia of rodents and refuses to come round unless the cat is shut in another room.

AIBU to say no way. Love me, love my cat?

OP posts:
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Original poster
SoftKittySillyKitty · 31/08/2017 12:27

Thank you toddler .

OP posts:
Titanz · 31/08/2017 12:27

what

That's why I said 'as much as we do'. I don't treat him like a human, he is clearly a dog. But whether he's an animal or not doesn't affect how much I love him and the respect I show towards him. I know you find that difficult to understand but if there's a hierarchy my dog is near the top alongside my DP, rather than a human friend I see once in a blue moon.

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 · 31/08/2017 12:28

Titanz Hmm

WiganPierre · 31/08/2017 12:30

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 thank you for speaking for all pet owners from your detailed survey of a few friends. My own extensive survey has shown most pet owners love their pet like a family member.

OP and Highway your cats are gorgeous!

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 · 31/08/2017 12:34

WiganPierre At no point did I say, or even imply, I was speaking for all pet owners. I specifically said I was talking about the friends I have who do have pets.

Seeingadistance · 31/08/2017 12:35

What a beautiful cat!

ikeadyounot · 31/08/2017 12:38

Aw, she's gorgeous. And not at all ratty.

Sounds like you have a good compromise right now with the visits. Clearly, your DM doesn't like cats. No, I don't get it either. Some people are just weird like that! Accept it and breeze past it!

Mittens1969 · 31/08/2017 12:50

Lovely cat, OP, and not at all rat-like!! Smile

RhiWrites · 31/08/2017 13:05

That's a Burmese. My parents have them and my partner calls them (affectionately) weasle-cats. They are absolutely lovely cats but I actually can see why they could trigger a rodent phobia. Very close coats and long whippy tails.

Original poster
SoftKittySillyKitty · 31/08/2017 13:52

I'm not sure what she is - very possibly Burmese, definitely oriental. I got her at six months and the vet thinks a mix of oriental and Russian.

Weasel cat 😹

OP posts:
OliviaStabler · 31/08/2017 16:46

This is why I'm so glad I know very few people with pets (and the ones I do know that have pets aren't as ridiculously precious about them as half the posters here hmm).

I'm glad I don't know you then, someone who cannot comprehend the feelings of others and dismisses as 'precious' our feelings.

Hiphopopotamus · 31/08/2017 16:52

People's attitudes towards their pets are bizarre and often have a lot of unhealthy projection involved. The amount of time spent you see dogs and cats talked about as if they have human emotions and reactions is quite frankly odd! They don't. They are animals. It usually comes from a person needing a relationship in their life - and it's a lot easier to have a relationship with an animal who won't challenge you or disagree with you. It's bizarre and unhealthy

Titanz · 31/08/2017 16:56

Oh yea we are all terribly lonely people who were it not for our dogs, would not feel the warm touch of companionship Hmm

Or maybe we are people with loving family and friends who have opened our doors to another creature and treat them as family. But you can carry on spouting your unsupported psuedo-pyschology if it makes you feel better to label us all as weirdos.

Ivegotnothing · 31/08/2017 17:22

Gorgeous cat. If any of mine said 'it's me or grandma' I would be just as disgruntled, but luckily cats aren't so mean...if they don't like you they'll just ignore you....that's much more acceptable!

HeebieJeebies456 · 31/08/2017 17:29

My own extensive survey has shown most pet owners love their pet like a family member

Same here!
They are sentient beings and more intelligent than a lot of people i know.
This is their home, they will never be shut away unless the visitor has allergies.
If you have a phobia about cats - don't come round.

Some of the stuff they do does make me wonder if they consider themselves humans though.....Grin Grin Grin

To be upset with my DM
To be upset with my DM
To be upset with my DM
grandOlejukeofYork · 31/08/2017 17:31

AIBU to say no way. Love me, love my cat?

Don't be daft. She's your mother. She's done more for you than your damn cat!

OliviaStabler · 31/08/2017 17:35

People's attitudes towards their pets are bizarre and often have a lot of unhealthy projection involved. The amount of time spent you see dogs and cats talked about as if they have human emotions and reactions is quite frankly odd! They don't.

Yes they do.

Original poster
SoftKittySillyKitty · 31/08/2017 17:43

Juke - that's quite a lot of aggression there.

Sheesh, I've said it was a lighthearted AIBU

OP posts:
Original poster
SoftKittySillyKitty · 31/08/2017 17:44

Come to think of it, is that you mum?

OP posts:
Hiphopopotamus · 31/08/2017 17:52

Yes they do

No. They really really don't.

Ceto · 31/08/2017 17:54

This is their home, they will never be shut away unless the visitor has allergies.

I find this quite bizarre. I'm all in favour of treating animals well, but animals don't regard bricks and mortar in the same way as we do, and really won't be scarred if, for a couple of hours, they can't access one part of the house. Friends and relatives definitely come first in my list of priorities.

Threenme · 31/08/2017 18:01

I would not shut my dog away if someone was just not keen on him- petrified fair enough but I wouldn't do it for a long period of time. Maybe I am projecting but he'd be upset, he's used to having the run of the house and being in our company. I don't think it's unhealthy to treat your pets like family members- if you don't you shouldn't have them!

pictish · 31/08/2017 18:07

I cba with someone wanting my cat shgut away because they have a fear of rodents. Go away with your attention seeking nonsense please. Come round when you can behave.

SilverySurfer · 31/08/2017 18:20

I had a cat just like yours OP - also grey very skinny with a thin tail. He ate like a horse and never put on any weight. Unfortunately he is no longer with me. Having looked at several cat breeds I believe he was at least partly Korat: www.bing.com/images/search?q=korat+cat&FORM=IARRTH&ufn=Korat&stid=3e9853d1-d679-a6ff-535d-383ffe7c4b0f&cbn=EntityAnswer&cbi=0&FORM=IARRTH

I checked regularly with my vet that he was ok and was told he was perfectly healthy. Tell your DM not all cats come in the same shape/size. (I am very envious of you having such a beautiful cat)
Smile

grandOlejukeofYork · 31/08/2017 18:38

Juke - that's quite a lot of aggression there

There is absolutely no aggression there. Please don't project your emotions onto my words.