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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not preemptively report neighbours to the police?

436 replies

Mrbluethecatt · 21/08/2017 15:32

I have a large back garden, large enough to have a trampoline, swing set with climbing ropes, cargo net and shoot. There is also a skateboard ramp type thing. This part of the garden isn't visible from the side gate.

Over the summer dss13 used the garden with his friends so the side gate wasn't always locked (with padlock and key). DH actually lost the padlock at one point so it was unlocked all the time when we were at work and dss13 was at summer clubs.

As the schools went back last week I asked dss19 to pick up a padlock and lock up before going out Friday morning. Dss19 picked one up and returned home, locked the side gate (without going into the garden). He was wearing his headphones (this is relevant).

I got a call from nice neighbour as he heard shouting at my front door with other neighbour banging on it. He was gone by the time I got home but left a note.

Essentially his DW had let their 3dcs (under 7) play in my garden (without our permission). This is something that she had done many times before when we were out. She then tried to leave but the side gate was locked. She had told her DH that she shouted at DSS who locked her in anyway. She got upset called him very upset as it was raining, kids crying etc.

Her DH had to leave work and get ladder to get them out of garden. The side gate is metal and is part of our garden wall. The note said that we were out of order, we have traumatized the DCs. He intends to report us to the police for unlawful detention. Hmm

Both DH and I have tried to speak with him and his DW over the weekend but they never answered their door. Dss said he didn't hear anything as he had his music on. I have suggested to DH we write them a letter. Telling them they were trespassing and shouldn't have been in the garden and that we are not responsible for what happened. DH also wants to preemptively report the neighbours to the police just encase. I think the neighbours are all talk and won't have went to the police themselves. DH disagrees. Should we report them?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Womendohavevaginasnick · 15/06/2021 23:45

Omg how was this not moved to classics. Howling.

BumbleFlump · 16/06/2021 00:04

Hmmmm a lot of people have been sneaking into other peoples gardens lately - since when did this become a thing 🤔

Frownette · 16/06/2021 00:11

@Kickthedoorbaby

This has to be one of the best things I’ve seen on here. Wonder what happened
Yes I thought that too!
Librariesmakeshhhhappen · 16/06/2021 00:28

@BumbleFlump

Hmmmm a lot of people have been sneaking into other peoples gardens lately - since when did this become a thing 🤔
Seeing as this was in 2017, it isnt exactly what I would call lately. Predates all the threads now by quite a few years.
Mothership4two · 16/06/2021 01:30

I haven't RTWT but I would contact my solicitor if I was you. You may need to send a (recorded) letter to ask them to stop trespassing. I have no expertise in this area, but I would want to ensure that we were not liable in case of an accident. Just to cover your backs and to protect their dcs.

When I was a younger a local teenager trespassed and used a trampoline and fell off and broke his neck.

And yes they are CFs

Mothership4two · 16/06/2021 01:32

@Librariesmakeshhhhappen

aahh just seen 2017!

Wingedharpy · 16/06/2021 01:47

@BumbleFlump :
I blame Boris.
He's confused people when he said 6 folk could meet up in the garden.
He never said whose garden, did he?

Backtoblack1 · 16/06/2021 02:52

CFs!!!

IntoAir · 16/06/2021 06:35

Grin Grin Grin @Wingedharpy

TheTruthAndNothingButTheTruth · 16/06/2021 07:15

Zombie thread but I’d love to know if the OP had any more hassle from her bonkers neighbour. I do LOVE that she worked in planning. How satisfactory.

Sparklingbrook · 16/06/2021 07:50

I thought using other people's gardens must be the new thing, but this zombie thread proves otherwise. Hopefully after nearly 4 years it will have been resolved...

NotTerfNorCis · 16/06/2021 07:54

Didn't notice how old this thread was!

Incredible though. 'We've been using your garden all summer without your permission so we should be allowed to continue.' What was WRONG with those people?

Butchyrestingface · 16/06/2021 08:30

Zombie AF but definitely deserving of an update. Grin

mogtheexcellent · 16/06/2021 08:40

@Mrbluethecatt

One of my favourite ever threads. No pressure but an update would be amazing. Have they tried accessing the parkour kit you were going to install?

LakieLady · 16/06/2021 08:42

@TheTruthAndNothingButTheTruth

Zombie thread but I’d love to know if the OP had any more hassle from her bonkers neighbour. I do LOVE that she worked in planning. How satisfactory.
Me too. I rather hope that the trespassing family have had to move out of sheer embarrassment.

@Mrbluethecatt, if you're still on here, your public would love an update. Grin

It's my favourite CF thread ever.

Ickythefirebobby · 16/06/2021 08:52

It’s not a Police matter. Trespass is a civi matter. How cheeky are they though.

Boo2012 · 16/06/2021 09:11

Even if the neighbours did contact the police I think they would be laughed at. After all they were trespassing in your garden which they shouldn't do. I would be mortified if someone came into my garden when I was out.

It's an easy mistake for your stepson to make. After all he had headphones on and even if he had heard children he may of just assumed they were in their own garden if they were out of sight from the gate.

Personally I would not go to the police but I would have a stern word with them suggesting they do not enter your garden again and if you do you would go to the police. Doubt they will do it again anyway now. Lesson learnt for them. Why can't they play in their own blinking garden?!

June2021 · 16/06/2021 09:13

Ignore them.
Keep the padlock on.
Don't worry about it.

Sparklingbrook · 16/06/2021 09:14

@Boo2012

Even if the neighbours did contact the police I think they would be laughed at. After all they were trespassing in your garden which they shouldn't do. I would be mortified if someone came into my garden when I was out.

It's an easy mistake for your stepson to make. After all he had headphones on and even if he had heard children he may of just assumed they were in their own garden if they were out of sight from the gate.

Personally I would not go to the police but I would have a stern word with them suggesting they do not enter your garden again and if you do you would go to the police. Doubt they will do it again anyway now. Lesson learnt for them. Why can't they play in their own blinking garden?!

It's ok, it was 4 years ago now. I hope they haven't still got the issue.
MGMidget · 16/06/2021 09:16

Maybe the best option is to make a record digitally with a date recording noting what happened. If done quickly it is a contemporaneous record so carries more weight as a record of what occurred. Then make use of it if you have to. Either type or handwrite a note and photograph with a digital camera that records time of photo. Then you can supply to the police. They sound incredibly cheeky!

It might be a good idea to install a security camera to make sure they aren’t accessing your garden via a ladder when you are out. It has been known for tresspassers to make claims for injury against property owners so if one of the children got injured on the play equipment they might try and sue you. They seem like the cheeky type who might do that!

evtheria · 16/06/2021 09:22

Oml this was the maddest thing I’ve read all week (including the news, so that’s saying something)... Sad it’s an old thread, I too would love an update on situation as I hope the neighbours’ ended up thoroughly embarrassed with themselves.

GilbertsLuckySocks · 16/06/2021 09:24

A PIN (police information notice) used to be issued a few years back for things like this. Mild harassment, etc. But it was pulled because people were using it for tit for tat complaints.

My sister had conducted an online hate campaign against me a couple of years ago, and as soon as I threatened police involvement, she got in there first with the police.

Being a bit green I let a lone policeman into my house at 11pm at night (I was a single parent then) and I signed a piece of paper he said, ‘just to show I've been round to talk to you’. I assumed this is what happened if the police come to see you. You sign something. I had plenty of experience with police before from my DV past, maybe I should have known better.

He didn’t seem interested that I had over 200 evidence posts from my sister and she had...... zero. Because I signed the bit of paper, she was then able to publish it to everyone, and made a public statement that she ‘could have me removed from the premises because of the order in place’ when we bumped into eachother at the same venue once.

Anyway!....posters are right the police may not be able to do anything, but it sounds as if your neighbour has a bee in their bonnet now, even through they were in the wrong, so be careful of retaliation.

youshouldbeplotting · 16/06/2021 09:26

It's a zombie GilbertsLuckySocks

3luckystars · 16/06/2021 09:29

Absolutely hilarious. I don’t know how I missed it at the time. That is just so funny. Thanks for bumping it up today, I really enjoyed reading.

Thehop · 16/06/2021 09:36

This thread was brilliant. Would love t know how it planned out @Mrbluethecatt

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