To despise Mother's Day

[Beelzebop]

Anyone with me? It's hard work being pleased /motherly all day as it is but when you're grieving your own Mum and just want to hide... It's getting ridiculous, it's everywhere!

It's a tough day for a lot of people. For years I used to stay in bed all day. I wanted to be a mother so much but wasn't. Now that I finally have children (through adoption) I still am not that keen.

I despise what it has become despite the original idea being a nice one. Shameless showing off and competing on the internet mainly. The deification of mothers as the pinnacle of female achievement. It's hooey. And yes, not being able to have kids makes you want to hide. Another club you'll never be able to join.

I am a mother and I don't like it.

sukey hits the nail on the head. It's the shameless showing off that kills me

Every year without fail Mothers Day ends up being like every other normal day. Kids fighting, arguing, demanding and generally being quite naughty. The 'awww' of it all goes within about an hour and the rest of the day is hard work. This year they are meant to be with their dad as it's his weekend, and I'm strongly tempted not to suggest otherwise and take myself off to do stuff I want to do for the day!

In my house it's just a normal day....but with a card* from DD.

*card: piece of A4 from the printer, folded and smeared with finger paintings

I like it.

Yes you get the people smug twats who show off on social media, but people are doing this every day anyway.

I get tea and toast in bed, a card and spoilt throughout the day. DH gets the same on Fathers day.

I feel for those who can't become parents though or grieving their own mother and appreciate it's hard on that day for them. :(

I hate it, it is particularly grim.

A mass appreciation of our mums so Clintons can make some money - there's nothing personal about it at all

It feels fake to me

Normal day with a card and maybe some flowers here. I don't expect or want anything more than that. I haven't noticed it 'being everywhere' tbh. If you have FB twats who show off on Mothers' Day, Christmas, birthdays etc about lavish gifts, being spoilt, or post nauseating memes about motherhood, they should be instantly unfriended. Job done.

I like the idea of Mothers Day, and having a day to think about and Tracy on how much you appreciate your Mum and to say thank you. I hate the commercialism though and the 'show off' Facebook posts.

It must be really hard for those who have lost their own Mum of are unable to have children themselves and social media must make this worse.

Don't hate it, don't love it. What I do hate though is the shitty 'mother of the year' and 'best mum' type contests that you see on 'This Morning' or in 'take-a-break' magazine. Who the fuck gets to decide who is the best mother? It's so insulting to every hard working mother in the world, to name ONE mother as the 'best.' If I was nominated as the best, I would die of embarrassment and refuse the 'award.' I have always been the best mother I can be, but would never accept a best mum award. It's just cringeworthy!

Plus, as has been highlighted, it's painful for people who have lost their mother (or God forbid, their child........ )

I choose a day out. Totally my choice so a long country walk and have a quiet grieve. I do not go on social media. I usually have a lovely day.

Sorry for others for whom its shit.

Social media definitely doesn't help!

Yanbu
Used to be OK until I lost my mum two weeks before a Mothers Day. I remember driving past a shop with a big sign saying treat your mum for Mothers Day and bawling.
Now it is easier as I have my DC to distract me but still it is hard.

I know what you mean Beeebop, this will be the first Mother's Day since my mom died and seeing all the cards and advertisements everywhere is like a kick in the stomach.

Lots of people love it. YABU.
I wouldn't care if they abolished it but I know its lovely for other people.

Yep fucking hate it. Haven't done Mother's Day for 20 years. Even though I'm a mum now I still hate it.

Yanbu. My mum died when I was young and I hate it. I've got a lovely DD now but I don't need a "special" day and if I only got coffee in bed once a year I'd be having a word with DH.

My Mum insists on her card saying 'Mothering Sunday' and these are increasingly hard to find, especially when you live abroad!!!

op I found it very very raw in the years after DM passed. Its horrid.

Now a long way down the line with my own DC its when I get to ask for some bulbs for the summer or this year maybe a face cream, I never buy for myself usually or get anything but I feel Its lovely to get flowers that will last year in and out. Id rather that than meal etc.

It's my first without my Mum. Last year I knew it would be the last one with her and it was special.
I am a Mum. But it feels a little hollow. Think I will join with those quietly grieving. Sending to those also grieving.

I'm with you - my mum died on Mother's Day - I hate all the displays of gifts and cards etc. I feel like a proper bah humbug 😳

My mum died. I realise not everyone's mum has died so it would be a bit selfish to resent it.

I do like it, I love my kids getting excited about giving me a card they made and hearing them waking up DH to make my secret breakfast...

But since my best friend lost her mum, and another friend lost her baby son, I see how horrific it can be to see post after post on Facebook of something that was taken from you. So I try to keep it under the radar...

It's up there with Valentines on my list of dislikes. You shouldn't need a specific, overpriced, comercialised day to tell your mum you love her. And it's insensitive advertising everywhere for those desperate to be mums, have lost their mums, or mums who have lost children.

when I was at university, my friend had lost her mum earlier that year. she had a part time job at whs, and the day the mothers' day cards came in, and she had to stack them on the shelves, she told me she sat in the stockroom and cried for 2 hours without stopping.

i felt so sorry for her. then a few years later I lost the best mother in the world myself, and I really understood it. I couldn't go near a card shop in late feb/march for years, it made me so sad and bitter for my mother at everything she was missing out on :(

but it is just a silly day when all's said and done. if some people want to make a fuss of it, great for them; if others don't, great for them too. DP and DD just get me a card and a tiny present (last year when she was a little baby he brought her in with one flower!) and that went a long way towards healing the pain.

to all those of you who have lost your mothers too. there are no words for how much it sucks!