to toilet train yet

Original poster

BeamMeUpScottie · 04/07/2016 00:18

Might help if I posted properly....son is 2.5 and my first. Been trying to tt for 3 weeks now and no success. Put him on toilet every hour, in undies but he just pees or poos in them. Seems uninterested. So tell me: how "easy" was tt'ing for you? What age did you do It? Any tips? I'm seriously considering just leaving it for now

OP posts:

BackforGood · 04/07/2016 00:19

No.
YANBU
He's 2 1/2, and it's Summer. Seems an excellent time to start.

BackforGood · 04/07/2016 00:20

OK, I was answering your first post. Then x-posted.
Plenty of people will be along soon to tell you to wait.

PeaceNotPieces · 04/07/2016 00:26

Ok so mine were 2.7, 3.4 and 3.6 when tt. All boys.

It's time when it's time. He won't be wearing nappies at 23.

I think it just had to click in their head and they're ready when they're ready.

Don't stress it and good luck.

Ps...my eldest is 9 and he's out of nappies

PeaceNotPieces · 04/07/2016 00:29

So my answer...leave it for now.

Try again in a month or two. Get some amazing undies (Spider-Man, paw patrol, Lightning McQueen etc) and try again.

Never criticise or punish an accident though.

Honestly,it just clicks with them.

mirime · 04/07/2016 00:31

Started DS last summer, so just under 2.5. He was happy to use potty, but wouldn't use the toilet, wear underwear or pull down pull ups. Wanted to be naked! We didn't rush him, so it's the last few months that he's happily started wearing underwear, using the 'big' toilet and so on. Still in pull ups at night but most mornings they're dry now.

We very rarely actually sat him on it. As he wouldn't wear underwear he spent a lot if time at home naked from the waist down. Had a handful of accidents when he was busy playing and didn't get to the potty in time but not many - he really didn't like weeing on himself. We had the potty just there for a bit and he'd sit on it fully dressed before trying anything more advanced.

He did take against the potty for a bit, so we bought him a Thomas the Tank Engine 'toilet' (we weren't allowed to call it a potty) which he loved.

Original poster

BeamMeUpScottie · 04/07/2016 00:32

Thanks a lot. Trying to delete that first post but can't figure it out. Yes, I like the perspective: I need to remind myself he won't be wearing nappies to work. Getting a bit stressed tbh

OP posts:

DramaAlpaca · 04/07/2016 00:47

Leave it until you are sure he's ready. When he is, he'll be trained in literally a couple of days. When they are ready it's so much easier & less stressful for everyone.

My three boys are in their late teens/early 20s now & back then we trained a bit earlier. Mine were trained at 2.2, 2.4 and 2.6. The eldest was showing an interest (he kept taking off his nappy & perching on the loo!) so we had a go & it took about a month for it to click properly, the middle one was reliably dry in about two weeks.

I decided to leave the youngest a bit later, and when we tried at 2.6 he was dry by day in three days because he was completely ready. We didn't bother with a potty, just went straight to the toilet.

MumOnACornishFarm · 04/07/2016 01:09

It seems whenever I have a question somebody makes a new thread asking just the same thing! I love MN. So glad I read this as my DM keeps going on at me that my brothers and I were all TT by 18 months, and I should think about starting. My DS is only 12 months.

Out2pasture · 04/07/2016 01:25

if you've been trying for three weeks without success give it a break and try again next month.
does he show any signs of being interesting in peeing on outdoor items? leaves flowers bugs?

MeAndMy3LovelyBoys · 04/07/2016 01:47

Ds1 had just turned 3 before he used the toilet. He started using the potty from about 2.8. He used to be scared of the toilet until I just plonked him on it one day when he said he needed a wee. He wasn't happy about it but I cuddled him while he was on the toilet and gave him loads of praise, and he wasn't scared after that. He then wanted to go on the toilet every 5 minutes!

Ds2 is now 3.4 and has a speech and language delay as well as having suspected ASD, so potty training him has been a bit more tricky. I'll keep trying but I know that he might even be 4/5 or older before he cracks it. He'll get there eventually.

MeAndMy3LovelyBoys · 04/07/2016 01:48

Ds3 is 1 so still a bit too young yet.

MoonriseKingdom · 04/07/2016 03:02

mumon you are not alone with that problem. My DD is 21 months and I feel not yet ready for tt. I have been fielding enquiries about when I am getting a potty from my MIL since about 15 months. Apparently 'all children' were tt by 18 months back in the day - I am sceptical, I bet there were a lot of accidents. My DM joined in as she hit 18 months. I'm 28 weeks pregnant. I'm really not convinced she's get it yet and I'm worried it would be hard work only for her to regress when the baby gets here. Will be waiting for a bit longer.

Pengweng · 04/07/2016 06:57

I have twins who are nearly four. One literally toilet trained herself at 2.5. Put her in undies one day, she peed her pants once, decide that it was gross and never did it again. Dry day and night from then on. The other twin wasn't ready until 3.5 and we have had a few ups and downs and she still has the odd accident but i would say she is 99% dry day and night. And treats/stickers etc never worked for either of them. They didn't do it until they were ready to do it.

branofthemist · 04/07/2016 07:02

Dd was a month off her second birthday. And tbh she trained herself. It was so easy. I think she must have seen the other kids at nursery using pottys.

She stopped going in her nappy at night and getting up to use the potty that was already in her room, then during the day started holding it until we got to one. We kept a potty at mums as well and she just started going on it there too, when mum looked after him.

Ds was 3.5 and was a lot more difficult. We used to have to bribe him with malteasers. Not my finest hour. It took him longer to be accident free.

froubylou · 04/07/2016 07:07

My ds is 2.7. He isn't ready yet. But has just this week started to express an interest in the potty and sitting on the toilet.

I am going to wait until he is begging to use them. I might do some barebum time in the garden or after a bath with the potty and step out for the toilet but that's it.

He is currently obsessed with washing his hands in the downstairs sink so might buy some character hand soap and a funky hand towel just for his use and tell him we only wash hands after a wee/poo on the potty/toilet.

But I am happy to wait until after Christmas when he will be 3 to try properly.

MrsBobDylan · 04/07/2016 07:18

It really does depend on the child. Has your DS managed any wees or poos in the potty? If he's regularly doing it in his pants, I'd give it a rest for now and try again later.

I have 3 boys and eldest was 2.8, youngest 2.5 (which I felt was too early but he was adamant) and middle one has ASD and is 6 and still not cracked it but I'm still hopeful!

Laiste · 04/07/2016 07:26

DD4 is 2.6. IF we ever get enough warm weather to have her run about half naked for a few days on the trot i'll bring the potty into play and see what happens. With my older 3 I can't for the life of me remember if i did it in the summer of when they were 2 and a half or 3 and a half!

DD4 is 2.6 and has her potty at the ready in the bathroom. She has shown a bit of interest, but i'm waiting for my spidey senses to say 'go ahead'. She's watching me on the loo and is showing an interest in that.

She has begun to take herself to a quiet corner to poo (in nappy), and occasionally comes to tell me she's poo'd, which is a good sign. I think i can spot when she's weeing as she glazes over and stops what she'd doing for a minute.

I think waiting till you're pretty sure they're ready is 100 times easier than starting too soon and everyone getting stressed. The last thing you want is to make a big issue out of it.

BasinHaircut · 04/07/2016 07:31

OP I was where you are and I gave up. DS wears pull ups but just uses them like a nappy so they are no help.

He is almost 3 and everyone apart from the nursery staff keep going on at me about toilet training. I just can't get worked up about it TBH.

It would be lovely to not have to change nappies anymore but i can't be bothered with scraping poo out of pants or all of the extra washing if he isn't quite ready.

If I catch him about to poo he will sit on the potty and go if I tell him to, but he will also quite happily still go in his nappy and not tell me. He will wee everywhere if I take his nappy off.

If you have had no luck after 3 weeks I'd leave it.

SoupDragon · 04/07/2016 07:34

I think that, regardless of when you toilet train them, they will be reliably trained at the same time they would have been if you'd started earlier/later.

If it's not working, leave it and come back to it later. It might be worth having s go over the summer, assuming we get one, as I'm told it's easier when they are mostly naked. All mine were done in Coker months though!

I can honestly say it was my least favourite part of parenting so far (DC are 17, 15 and 10) :)

f1ddlesticks · 04/07/2016 07:37

Don't know if this would help but something that helped us - we used to sit DD on the potty every night before her bath. If something came out we'd make a huge fuss, and if nothing did we'd just pop her in the bath after 5 mins. We probably did this for at least a month - got her used to the idea of what it was for and what it felt like to pee in something other than a nappy. She started noticing and saying when she was doing a wee in her nappy. At about 2.6 she decided she wanted to do all her wees in the potty and we started TT.

SatsukiKusakabe · 04/07/2016 07:40

I think I would ease off on it for now, but keep the potty available and try him on it first thing in the morning or before bath and see if it he has any success, no pressure, just to keep the idea there.

I started with my son in summer at 2.5 and he just didn't get it. A few months later, nothing. Age 3.3, terrible experience. Age 3.5, cracked it in a few days. In hindsight he had never mentioned having been for a wee, stemmed to have no idea he was going and just wasn't ready and I wish I hadn't pushed him the two middle times. He also couldn't manage his clothes well by himself. I went by his age rather than if the signs were there, which was silly.

My dd is 2.5 and regularly tells me what she's done, can change her own nappy, sometimes takes herself for wees first thing. I am waiting for the holidays when I don't have school runs to buy her some pants, but she is getting there herself and only needs a nudge.

Minisoksmakehardwork · 04/07/2016 07:47

I went with benign neglect potty training. That is, I waited until they wanted to use the potty themselves, though they were available in the house from around 2. Dd1 was harder to train but i think that was because I felt she had reached that magic age when she should train. She was dry quite quickly but poo was a whole other matter. So we left it until she was telling us she needed to go. Once it clicked she was clean day and night at the same time.

Ds1 I was sure was going to be going to school in pull ups! He wasn't successfully dry and clean until 2 months after his 4th birthday and was still in pull ups for night until he was nearly 5. I think his baby brother being in the same page toilet training wise really pushed him into it.

Ds2 on the other hand was reliably dry and clean around 2.5 during the day. He was dry at night by 3.

Dd2 (ds2's twin) still isn't dry at night at 4. She was dry during the day just after her 3rd birthday.

Justaskingnottelling · 04/07/2016 07:47

Yy to waiting til they're ready. Various competitive parents tried before their children were ready and they ended up still sorting out accidents ages after mine were dry day and night. I'd just give it a go every three-four weeks; see how you go and don't put any pressure on dc. Know it's really, really hard but try and act as relaxed as possible about any accidents. Saves you way more trouble in the long run. Good luck!

LillianGish · 04/07/2016 07:53

Mine were both two-and-a-half - girl then boy. They had to be dry to start nursery school in France and it's pretty much the norm here. Did it in the summer, bought potty, removed nappies and dedicated a week to it - to staying close to home (if not at home). I rewarded with a smartie for a wee in the potty and they both got it within a few days (I think bribery was definitely the key to start with - whatever works for you). It helped for me that I had a deadline, without it I probably wouldn't have made the effort (nappies are much easier than potty training and then having to remind them to go or having to find a loo). I think babies were out of nappies earlier years ago because disposables didn't exist so it was easier to have a child who was potty trained - especially when out and about. I also think it was easier that there were lots of full time mums who could dedicate a few days to it. Much more difficult to do if you want to drop your child at the childminder or at someone's house for a few hours when the temptation is to put a nappy on and then you are back to square one. That's why I think it helped me to clear a week on the calendar.