to toilet train yet

[BeamMeUpScottie]

My son is 2.5. He I have

Gina ford's book on toilet training is excellent.

Some of my friends did the whole week at home and see what happens approach. They did get their LOs potty trained, BUT it came with lots of accidents. We had tried occasionally since she was 2', but she wasn't ready. Then about 2.5 she suddenly decided that she was going to wee in the toilet and that was it. Pooing in the toilet took a bit longer, and we did have accidents there though.

About the best piece of advice I had from a health visitor was to wait until they are nearly 3. Her point was that, for our mothers, nappies just weren't as good, so the pressure to train came from that - it was grim to have a child in nappies. I've seen people train at just over 2 - but it's more like training a dog, in the sense that they aren't old enough fully to understand or to communicate clearly with you when they need to go. Hence - you need to carry a potty with you everywhere you go and (at least in my opinion) that's hell of a lot more stress than changing a nappy. When they are a bit older, you'll know when they are ready (mine asked to wear pants and took the nappy off!) and, as others have said, they get it in a few days. I found it really daunting, but everyone gets there - as you say, he won't be going to work in nappies!!

I kept trying to TT DS and he wasn't getting it at all just pooing and weeing in his pants all the time. Was under pressure from everyone to get it done because he was over 3 and I was preg with DC2. Kept being told 'I didn't want to have 2 in nappies'. Eventually realised I had no problem with this and that all the extra washing/cleaning wee and poo off floor and furniture with a newborn would be worse than having two in nappies. Left it till he was 3.5 when he must have been ready as just did it with no accidents after day 2. He's 4.5 now and can count accidents he's had on one hand. In my experience it is just so much easier to wait until they are ready and you have so much time if he is still only 2.5.

I just waited till mine were ready. Which is three things - firstly knowing when they need to go (this happened around 1), secondly caring whether they should go in a potty or nappy, and thirdly being able to hold their wee for at least five minutes (hardest!).
Mine were both around 2.5 (girls) and I did nothing at all to tt. Never had an accident from either of them.

Waited for mine to do it themselves, nothing happening as they got to 3.5, gave them a gentle push towards it (bought pants, told them it was time to try now) and they got it right away. Very very few accidents and the whole thing took a week, if that.

They were both in night nappies until going on 6, but I don't think I've ever changed a wet bed. Actually, I can think of once. But that's it.

I waited until 3 as he just wasn't ready, he got it within days. The other thing I did was not put him on the toilet, I just kept reminding him if he needed a wee. I wanted him to recognise when he needed to go.

Dd1 trained easily at 2.5. Dry at night then too.

Dtd trained easily at 2.8. Still not dry at night now at 3.9.

Dts has been tricky. He was dry at 3.4 but still not clean at 3.9. Not dry at night either.

It just shows how different they all are! Don't get stressed, there's honestly no point. At 3 weeks, I think you've given it a good go so I'd stop and try again in 6 weeks time.

My kids are in their 20's are were all completely tt by three. Two of them were about 2,6. They were late to be TT where I lived. (Overseas)

I would persevere as it is so liberating for the kids when they get the hang of it and the summer is such a good time. It's also more comfortable for the kids. I found giving them loads and loads of liquid when they were TT helped so they kept needing to pee.

I don't know why so many people TT so late now. I think it might be because you can go to preschool in nappies or perhaps because nappies are better.

I do understand that Some kids have genuine problems and can't be TT young.

First tried toilet training DS when he was 2y 9m simply because it was summer rather than him showing any interest. He didn't get it at all - I got him to sit on the potty regularly but he would wee on the floor within seconds of getting off it. We had another failed attempt just after he was 3.

We tried again when he was 3 and a half and on day 3, he just got it. I can count on one hand the number of wee accidents he's had since. Poos took a bit longer but once he got it, he's never had a poo accident since. We realised from the failed attempts that he doesn't need to go that often, so we backed off from getting him to try so often which definitely worked better for him.

So in my experience, when they're ready it doesn't take long at all.

I'm firmly in the wait till they're ready camp. When they're truly ready for toilet training they'll be dry within a week ime. My dcs were 3.3, 2.11, 3.6, and 2.5 when they were reliably dry during the day, between all of them only my eldest was the only one to have an accident during the day and even then it was only twice when she was bust playing.

I got fed up of the "s/he should be using the potty by now" comments from mil and sil. Ds and dn are about the same age (ds is three months older) and sil insisted on potty training dn at 2, i left ds until he was ready at a few weeks before his 3rd birthday, he went from nappy to toilet in a day with no accidents whereas dn was still having several accidents a day for another 6 months after 18 months of toilet training. Funny enough I didn't get any comments after that.

Don't worry about night time either. They need to produce a hormone to be dry at night and it can take years after being dry during the day for this to happen. Ds was dry in the day at 2.11 and was nearly 6 before he was completely dry at night.

As with many others, we just waited until they were both nearly 3 or maybe just after, I can't remember exactly but I do know that no 'training' was needed. Absolutely no drama or frustration on any count as they were just ready, maybe we could have trained them earlier but I am sure it would have led to more accidents/stress.

DS was three and got it in a couple of days during the day but nights took a lot longer

DD toilet trained at 2 years 6 months in 3 days - never had an accident. Day dry but stayed in night nappies another year.

DS1 toilet trained at 2 years 9 months in about 5 days - bit more effort (key seemed to be not wearing underpants as they felt like a nappy - bare bum at home and loose baggy airy shorts out and about). he had a couple of accidents the first day and maybe one on day 3 and one on day 5 and then never had an accident again. He was also night dry from the first nappy free day and never has wet the bed, ever.

Both DD and DS1 asked to stop wearing nappies - DS1 asked to stop wearing them at night, which I didn't expect to be a success but it was, right from the first night.

I thought the key was to wait til they suggested it... cue DS2, whose entire reason for being has been to show me that I was getting complacent thinking I knew what I was doing and that everything, in every area of parenting, that worked with DC1 & 2 would not work with him :o

DS2 never asked to potty train and was still in nappies at 3, having tried and failed at about 2 years 9 months and again at about 2 years 11 months (no interest, just acted as if he had a nappy on and peed/ pooed, and didn't produce anything on the toilet). He said he liked nappies and wanted to stay a baby (a very bloody articulate baby!)

When I bribed him with something he really, really wanted (golden underpants... who knows why... and a light sabre) he tried really, really hard at about 3 years 3 months and cracked it. Quite a few accidents but he was focussed and actually wanted to (but for the reward, where the older two had wanted to get rid of nappies). In the end he cracked it in about ten days and after that had very occasional accidents - maybe once a week for a few weeks, then for a few more months he might have a very rare accident, maybe one a month. He was 100% reliable before he turned 4 at least...

The child has to be motivated in some way, whether intrinsically (which is the best way obviously) or by a reward.

If you see no progress at all after 3 days just put the nappy back on and try again in a couple of months.

Kids used to be routine trained back in the days of very early potty training. Its still perfectly possible to routine train, but a routine trained child will still have accidents if not put on the potty at the same exact times every day - so routine training is only worth while if your child is with you at all times or if your alternative child care will stick to your set routine (a nanny would or should, a child minder might, depending on their own routine and how much they go out and about etc.) a nursery probably won't be able to).

Some routine trained children make the transition to recognising when they need to go seamlessly, but others have to re-learn to do that - which is why kids were having accidents at school 40 or 50 + years ago just as they do today... though it was rare to start school in nappies it wasn't rare at all for 5 year olds to wet themselves regularly at school.

A friend of mine had to routine train very early - just under 18 months - to alleviate her child's extreme and almost permanent nappy rash, and was successful, but when she tried to deviate from the routine when her child was over 2 the child started having multiple accidents per day again.

Training too early can also cause bladder problems in later childhood and adulthood for some people.

My advice is don't try to train. Don't pressure them.

DS potty trained himself at 3.5 with almost no accidents. We had potties out and pants etc from around 2.5. under pressure from parents we attempted training him but he wasn't really ready, we stuck him back in pull ups and left it.

I wish I'd just trusted he'd get there by himself instead of stressing about it.

Fwiw the children I know who trained closer to 2 now have more accidents or issues (eg holding in poo) than those who got it at 3 or after.

Really depends on the child though. DD1 trained in less than a week at 2. We had a couple of weeks with portable potty but then was fine. Was dry through the night at 2.5. Dd1 took about 3 weeks but she wasn't yet 2. I did then though as it was warm and she could run around outside without a nappy. She was dry through the night a little later but before 3. Lots of kids are later though.

My 4 were trained before 3 and didn't have accidents once trained. With three of mine, including the two that were TT the earliest, it was simple if not a bit frustrating. I didn't 'routine' train them. I just kept asking them if the needed the toilet. My last DC was the trickiest. I was sure he was ready but he was less co-operative. He was just under three when I told him off for saying he didn't need a poo then walking away and doing one in his nappies......not my finest parenting hour but it worked and he was TT since that moment. He really was just being stubborn. I know that goes against lots of Mumsnet advice but it worked for us. It was literally one telling off and it was sorted.

I believe it's in the child's interest to get them TT at a reasonable age. I know it doesn't always work but leaving it until they tell you seems a bit 'crunchy'

I've known plenty of kids who were not much older than two who were completely reliably trained. That wouldn't have worked with my kids but it's definitely doable for a lot of people.

My 4 DC were born within 5 years so I was very motivated not to have more than two in nappies at any one time. Sometimes I wonder if the nappies these days make it too easy not to bother TT

Started when 2, did no pants or nappy when home with a potty in the living room so he could go on it himself when when he needed without any help, he had a potty training book and sticker book.
He got a small treat/snack if he did a poo and got to do a sticker when he did a wee.
For us it took him longer to learn how to pull his pants and trousers up and down then it did to get him using the potty, he is pretty daft though.
For every week of no accidents he got a new book (£1 from the works, nothing extravagant).
It did take a few weeks because he regressed for a while when new baby arrived.
Good luck

Both of my ds were over 3yrs and once they got it were dry both day and night almost immediately. Ds 2 didn't get pooing for ages, and I was sick of washing pooey nappies, so put him back in nappies for another couple of months, he got it the next time round.

Never really had accidents either.

I worked in a nursery, and a parent put her 18 month old ds in pants. He had daily accidents at Nursery for the next year. I imagine she still boasts about him being toilet trained at 18 months

I'd leave it three months then try again. If you wait until he's ready it should be fairly easy. Both mine were two years 11 months and it wasn't remotely stressful. I know lots of children who were 3.5 and a few who were only just 2. There's a wide range of when children are ready.

With ds1 it took a few attempts. He did it in a week at 2.10. He just got it.

Dd did it herself at 22 months. We already had a potty lying around for ds1 and she just used it.

Ds2 is 2.4 and beginning to show an interest but doesn't seem to actually understand what to do.

If they are ready they get it very quickly. If they are still having regular accidents and making no attempts to use the toilet/potty after a week then I would say they are not ready.

Ds was 3.6 - I had many MANY nosey parkers telling me to get on with it (except his nursery, who told me I knew him best). He literally went for a wee in the toilet with his dad one morning and 2 days later was completely dry with no wee or poo accidents and immediately dry for 11hrs at night. It was the strangest thing I'd ever seen but also amazing to skip the soggy pant stage! 1 year later and he's never wet himself or the bed. So I can't say that WE TT him...he did it himself