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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU or is my DH a prick?!

52 replies

Nuggy2013 · 02/07/2016 22:20

Long story short I am 5 months pregnant with DC2 and have DD age 2.9.

DH works away. Therefore, DD spends majority of time with me and is v clingy in front of other people. DH decides I need a break/time for DD to get used to not being with me all the time etc to takes her to Spain for two days to family and comes back today. I had two great nights sleep, DH and DD had a great time, everyone is happy.

DH normally does majority of cooking when home. I decided to make something new (Joe Wicks recipe if interested) and long story short, it was a disaster. Dinner was not fit for human consumption.

AIBU to think this is an accidental fuck up? Or is DH right and it's worthy of a load of verbal abuse and blame to make me feel like shit?? Clearly making a crap dinner was deliberate and on my agenda Hmm

Anyway, after two days apart, we're now in separate rooms and no sign of effort from either party!!!

OP posts:
RJnomore1 · 02/07/2016 22:21

Was it the chicken and lentil Dahl thing?

Original poster
Nuggy2013 · 02/07/2016 22:22

No, bloody chicken and bacon. To be fair, it was like boiled shit. Totally vile!!!

OP posts:
Princesspinkgirl · 02/07/2016 22:23

Ridiculous behaviour from your dh tell him to stop being a bloody moron

sepa · 02/07/2016 22:23

So he thinks you decided to mess dinner up on purpose when he usually cooks? What would be the point? I could (maybe) understand messing it up if you always cooked dinner and it was his turn

Tangfastics · 02/07/2016 22:24

Drip, drip.....

How bad was it really?
What time did your husband and daughter get home?
Could you have got a take away?
What did he actually say?
Do you think this really warrants 2 days incommunicado?

Tiggeryoubastard · 02/07/2016 22:24

I'm a bloody good cook but even at 50 have the occasional fuck ups. If my dp acted like that his dinner all week would be warm - in the dog.

Zarah123 · 02/07/2016 22:24

Not sure why anyone would go to the trouble (and waste) of deliberately cooking a crap dinner. Why does he think this?

Original poster
Nuggy2013 · 02/07/2016 22:25

It was shit, they've been away two days and came back today at 5. Offered take away replacement and it was refused so there hasn't been two days incommunicado, he's been away for two days.

OP posts:
monkeywithacowface · 02/07/2016 22:26

There's no drip feeding OP already stated in her first post that it wasn't fit for human consumption Hmm

monkeywithacowface · 02/07/2016 22:27

He's a prick

Original poster
Nuggy2013 · 02/07/2016 22:29

Thanks monkeywithacowface, thought so but needed some independent adjudication

OP posts:
AliceInHinterland · 02/07/2016 22:30

I get a bit like this when I'm hungry, although I wouldn't go as far as verbally abusive. It's not very nice, there's no excuse for it but I get terribly hangry. Also sounds a bit like he's punishing you for having to look after his own daughter for two days. Silly sod.

Tangfastics · 02/07/2016 22:30

Apologies, I misunderstood the 2 days thing.

I think the suggested takeaway was the best thing, but now I see he rejected so I now think I'm in the HWBU camp!

MouldyPeach · 02/07/2016 22:31

He's a prick. Is he always a prick?

Original poster
Nuggy2013 · 02/07/2016 22:36

Generally no, not always a prick but like everyone he has his moments! He and DD came home after a great two days, I did dinner (the disaster) and put DD to bed and tidied etc and then he reacts like I've served him up dog shit on toast for some personal vendetta??! Admittedly the dinner wasn't far off the mark of dog shit on toast but if it's meant for me too I've hardly done it intentionally??

OP posts:
NicknameUsed · 02/07/2016 22:36

What was the recipe?

monkeywithacowface · 02/07/2016 22:37

I'm no stranger to hunger rage and maybe he is tired from traveling but he should have just agreed to the take away, eaten it quietly in front of some crap tv and then had an early night.

Original poster
Nuggy2013 · 02/07/2016 22:39

It was a creamy chicken thing. In hindsight, the balls up came by not having pan hot enough etc to do the sauce well, sorting out snack for DD and putting her to bed. Should have just shouted him to take over/sort it out but thought I was doing a good deed. Won't happen again.

OP posts:
Kitsandkids · 02/07/2016 22:39

It sounds like he's had a stressful couple of days with DD. Not that that excuses his behaviour. He's being stupid.

MouldyPeach · 02/07/2016 22:39

So what did you all eat in the end? If he's normally ok then he'll come around and talk about it soon, surely. Probably stressed and hangry.

Original poster
Nuggy2013 · 02/07/2016 22:43

Left him eating cheese and crackers, we'll see if he talks about it without prompting

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 02/07/2016 22:45

He acted like a prick.

If either me or my DH went to the effort of cooking a nice dinner and fucked it up, the other person would have nothing but sympathy.

Especially if the takeaway was open anyway and we had the money.

Shit happens.

ImSoVeryTired · 02/07/2016 22:47

No need to be rude. You tried to do a nice thing and it went wrong. We all have those moments. Even with recipes we are familiar with. It's hardly likely you would mess it up on purpose. Here's hoping he gets some grub in him and apologises for acting like a twat. Flowers op and hope your evening improves.

trafalgargal · 02/07/2016 22:59

Normal people would laugh about it and get a takeaway .......and maybe tease you about it for years to come.

He's acting like idiot -but possibly he's exhausted after 2 days as a fulltime Dad plus travelling so over reacted but if he doesn't apologize once he's slept then he's a dick.

Wdigin2this · 02/07/2016 23:14

Oh yes, hunger rage....I'm guilty of that too! If I came home tired, hungry etc, to an inedible meal, I wouldn't be very nice either...but I would have grabbed the take away option! Don't understand why he thinks you did it on purpose though?!