To think these hours might be too exhausting?

[PregnantAndEngaged]

I am back to work off maternity leave on Monday and I'm a bit concerned I've not asked for my hours wisely. At the time I asked for them I was thinking of spending maximum time with my son and reducing expenditure on childcare as my partner could look after him in the evenings.

Monday: wake up at 7am, look after son until 1pm, travel to work from 1.30, work starts at 3pm until 9pm, travel home and get home at 10.30pm.
Tues and Weds off but looking after son
Thurs: same as Mon
Fri: same as Mon
Sat and Sun off, looking after son but can delegate some responsibility to partner.

Note I never get a lie in as he wakes at 7am without fail. I appreciate I still get 4 days 'off' though and I think this is why I chose awful hours, but I'm feeling shattered and I haven't actually started work yet. Starting to feel stupid for choosing the hours I did.

Someone tell me this is manageable and I won't be completely exhausted and run down!

Eh your working three days a week, dont deligate to partner- tell him to pitch in equally and your dancing

Thursday and Friday will be tough but honestly I don't think that's too bad. I sympathise though as when I start work late in the day it does sort of feel like it's hanging over you all day a bit!

But that's a heck of a commute for 18 hours a week!

You need to hit bed as soon as you get home on a work day so in bed by 11pm, you will get a good 8 hrs.

Sounds manageable to me. Yes, you'll be tired, but whatever hours you work you'll still be tired! I found the first year after my maternity leaves very tough, but it's okay now the kids are a bit older.
For context, I work 5 days a week, we get up at 6:30, leave the house at 7:45, drop off kids at childcare, get to work for 8:45. Leave work at 5:30, pick up kids, home for 6:15.
I do have the school holidays off to recover which helps hugely - I'm constantly in the countdown to the next holidays.

Working three days from 3 until 9 looks ok to me. Can't you take it in turns to have a lie in at the weekend? Although in my experience the concept of a lie in disappears somewhat once kids are on the scene irrespective of the hours you work

Yeah I keep telling myself it's only 3 days and that Thurs and Fri will be difficult and then it's the weekend, but tbh I never get a lie in. I don't even think I physically can now either after months of getting up at 7am without fail. Even when my partner is at home, he lays in and I get up when baby wakes (don't want to say anything as he does work 5 days a week, and he's always been good in helping with the night feeds and dream feeds, and we take it in turns cooking dinner).

Yes, it's 3 x 6 hour shifts however including looking after my son and travel, Monday, Thurs and Fri will be 15.5 hour days for me.

I think it seems daunting now because you'll have been off for a while and everything's going to seem a bit big and scary. Once you get into the routine of it I think you'll be fine - give it a couple of months and then reconsider if you're on your knees at that stage.

It's the commute that's the killer rather than the 3 6 hour shifts. I think.I'd look at doing 2 long days, 2x9hr shifts? Would that be possible?

You are only doing 6 hour shifts, am I reading this wrong?

I don't think you'll be too tired but you won't have much downtime to yourself. Make sure your dp gives you a break at the weekend.

On the plus side you will have plenty of time with your dc and low childcare costs, so hopefully you can do nice things in your time together.

Your partner should get up once on a weekend but your son being up at 7 is pretty good really! And you get time with your ds every day which is lovely.
Is there any way you can reduce the commute? 90 mins is quite long.

You'll be fine. When mine were little I did two days of 3 til midnight and and three days of 5 til midnight which included alternate weekends.

Him working 5 days a week doesn't mean he can't pull his weight.

You both deserve the same amount of life ins/ downtime on the weekends

Blimey ruddynorah, that sounds tough! How did you manage?

Totally manageable, you will get used to it very quickly but is there no way you can get another job without the 3 hour daily commute?

Callitdelta yes that's right, my partner can look after our son from 6ish so that save us 9 hours a week (well more than that if we would have had to include my travel time which is roughly 1.5 hours).

You've prioritised time with your son over downtime in the evenings but since it's only three days a week this should be fine. What's your commute like? Can you get the train and watch something on your tablet with a cheeky glass of wine?

This sounds fine to me (would love to do these hours!). Surely you and your partner can have a lie in at the weekend while the other gets up so you both get to catch up on sleep?

inlectorecumbit, it's only because I have to get the bus to another town (I can't drive). It's two different buses. I used to live in that town but when I got pregnant we had to buy a house and this was the cheapest yet nicest house we could find. Where my work is is a very expensive place to live. So I knew the commute would be killer. However it's quite a low down job and they are very flexible and for the type of work I couldn't ask for better money really so kind of need to stick with it until I can get my career.

Pregnant, this is honestly said very kindly but it's one child and a part time job, it's not going up chimneys :) You will be fine.

It's not work that's the source of the problem wrt lie ins is it? Since you don't start until 3?