Anyone else's mum a bit shit at giving advice <lighthearted>

[SooYoon]

I love my mum.

But she's not very reassuring!!

So if I go to her with a little niggle/moan I just end up feeling worse after!!

Can anyone relate??

Yes!

When I was pregnant with DD I was very afraid of miscarrying (I'd had a missed miscarriage 2 years before) and mum's advice?

"Well as long as you're not silly, going out in high heels and getting drunk you'll be fine"

Yes. When I got dumped many moons ago she just said 'Never mind. I'll come & see Rambo with you'.

FFS it was HIM that had wanted to go & see the fecking film. I wasn't into it at all. It was hardly reassuring that she didn't even bloody know that!

Yes! When I was 24 and living with a controlling emotionally abusive creep, I told mum I was thinking of leaving him, she said maybe you're a bit bored, perhaps you should have a baby!!! Uh worst idea ever mum.

Yep, when I split up from somebody I'd really liked she said:
'Have you thought that maybe you're really shit in bed'

Yes. If she tells me how I should be spending my disposable income one more time I might say something I regret.

I like holidays with DH & the kids - she thinks I should decorate the house

Yes, whatever the ailment I happen to mention to her that I/ we have (think minor headaches, colds, sore throat stubbed toe) her advice is ALWAYS ring up the doctors for an emergency appointment.
She doesn't understand that viruses cannot be treated by antibiotics and that going to the doctors with one would be a waste of their and my time and prevent someone who really needs it. I just say fine whenever she asks how we are now.

Oh my cross out didn't work.

Yes! My mum just talks about herself.,,,"when I had all 4 of you kids it was hard for me..,blah, blah, blah" I've got 3 kids so she always trumps me!! Well mother I'm not talking about you, I'm asking about me!!!! Aaarrtgh

Thanks! Good to know it's not just me

Some of these are - whitershade!!

Mine is quite petty but still annoying. Was saying about how I miss my best childhood friend (been friends 13 years, seen each other through secondary school and uni) and was worried we were becoming less close... Her response: "maybe she prioritises different things ie not me now... Also friends aren't everything" Practical yes but jeez, some sympathy would be nice!

Also when I went on a date a while back and was saying how I was nervous etc, she told me she couldn't understand why as he was only human - she also said not to expect too much! Logically I know she's right but god, live a little, mum!

Argh bing that sounds frustrating!

And ruby mine's like that! She also thinks that having wet hair will give me "a chill" rather than colds being spread by a virus

Yes. My mum is lovely but when dd was a baby and I asked her what she did about a particular issue when I was that age she'd say 'oh I don't know, it was a long time ago'. But I guess at least it meant she wasn't an interfering old bat mother like some of the ones that people talk about on here.

Oh yes!!! Absolutely every and any situation I am in or mention to her about, she has 'just last week' read an article in the Times about it and knows the exact way to deal with it...
Me "my sons toe fell off this morning"
Her " oh I read an article about that in the Times last week, you need buy xxx cream from boots-it's been proved to be the best in the world...let me see if I can find it"

She can never find it...

Obviously that hasn't happened yet but I'm fully prepared for it!

SooYoon oh yes, my mum also thinks that you catch a cold by going out with wet hair, and that paracetamol cures everything

Yes. She says she hates antibiotics and they are killing people.... she's on them every week and if DS even sniffs, she demands I "make" the doctor give them to him!

She goes on about all the chemicals there are in our food, its killing people... so on the nights she has DS they eat MD's or premade Iceland cuisine!

When DS was 2 days old and crying, she said it was obvious he was manipulating me and I was making a rod for my own back by picking him up/feeding him!!!

Apparently I am always making weird food. Ie, from actual real life food and not a Schwartz packet of beef casserole.

DP makes me laugh with his predictions of what she'll come out with, he's spot on!

My mum has come up with some corkers. Some really bitchy ones too. I'll get writing.........

She probably felt taken advantage off - not by you, but by the other woman who was effectively having free childcare

Honestly my mum is an idiot.

When I told her about my fertility problems, she said don't worry my brother would give her grandchildren.

When I told her my first husband had died she said, it's good as I was young and could find someone else quickly, I was in my 20's!!

She is either self absorbed or stupid, I'm leaning towards both!

Wrong thread

I am. Too miserable by half. Always see the obstacles, pitfalls, risks, and feel it my duty to warn about them.

Wet hair causes a cold.
Any time im not feeling well is because i dont eat enough.
Taking Paracetamol / giving kids calpol is practically drug abuse and everghing can be solved by gargling with salt water.

But she is so negative! About everything! my dd got a mermaid swimming outfit this week. I said isnt it cute as my dd aged 5 walked in the room wearing it. My mum said 'yes as long as she doesnt trip and break her neck.' Who says that?!

Callleigh!! Oh my gosh my mum so would have said something like that

She has form for always seeing the negative too or being overly critical.

isnt it cute as my dd aged 5 walked in the room wearing it. My mum said 'yes as long as she doesnt trip and break her neck.' Who says that?
I'm not your mum, am I?
Oh, no. I know my dd's username.
Glad I'm not the only one.

I'm lucky that my mum is lovely but she does still give crap advice.

I remember when I was in school I was really worried about my best friend who kept bursting into tears over nothing. My mum's advice was that it was all just hormones and I should just ignore her. Best friend was actually suffering from depression .

And similar to Bing's mum, whenever I'm struggling she's always got a story about how she was in the exact same situation once but she had flu and 2 more dcs than me and no help from anyone, she just coped. Then she wonders why I never ask her for help when I'm struggling!

My mam is a very jealous person
She takes a score anywhere she can

Eg I say neighbours have painted their house- she says that husband isnt nice to his wife .

Why does she need to do people down .

It sounds like a silly thing, but my mum really doesn't understand hairstyles (she has very fine hair that she has worn short for as long as I can remember. I have thick, curly hair and obviously didn't brush it between washes (unless I wanted to look like Crystal Tips). My mother insisted that I must brush my hair, and that using an Afro comb would allow me to do so without breaking up the curls . She actually bought me one and everything.