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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To complain to the head about this?

69 replies

Givinguph0pe · 01/02/2016 09:43

Ds is 6 and in year 2. He is mildly dyspraxic and has problems with his vision. However he absolutely adores PE.
A couple of weeks ago we had a newletter saying a 'small group' of year 2 children were going to the high school to take part in a sports carousel morning. Not competitive just a range of activities.

This week ds suddenly started crying at dinner time. 18 out of 24 children had been chosen by the PE teacher to go. Ds was bitterly disappointed that he hadn't been chosen. I know they can be chosen for everything but 18 out of 24 is not a small group. In my mind you take them all or less than half. The PE teacher had come into the class and said these were the children he'd 'chosen.' Of the other five not chosen I know two are asthmatic, one is mildly autistic and one is quite overweight. Obviously the children not going had been hand picked.
I spoke to the class teacher who said she would have chosen names out of a hat which is what I'd have done in that situation. At least it would be fair that way albeit disappointing. Now ds feels like he's one of six children who the PE teacher doesn't like and that he's rubbish as PE. I'm quite cross about it.

Dh thinks we should write to the head to make sure it doesn't happen again but is it a bit special snowflake? I have spoken to the teacher already after all. Otoh I don't agree at all with how the PE teacher went about it. If it was competitive and they were older I can see he'd want the children who were best at PE but it was just a fun morning of sports activities which ds would have loved.

OP posts:
Seahorsecandy · 01/02/2016 09:45

I think if they're taking 18 then they may as well take them all.. Why bother leaving 6 out? I'd understand this if it was the other way round and they just chose 6.

I wouldn't complain as such, I'd just highlight it as you have here and express your disappointment

HooseRice · 01/02/2016 09:45

PE teacher is an arse shock

Speak to the head if you think it will help your DS and others in future.

Original poster
Givinguph0pe · 01/02/2016 09:46

Well by small group I thought it meant 5 or 6, which would have been fine. 18 is not a small group is it?! It's 3 quarters and makes it obvious who is left out.

OP posts:
Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 01/02/2016 09:48

It seems like discrimination to me. Ynbu to complain at all, and now 3/4 is by no means a small group

WorraLiberty · 01/02/2016 09:49

It's probably up to the high school how many kids come. If it's anything like my local high, they'll have kids from other schools taking part too.

The kids with the best attendance normally get to go.

bumbleymummy · 01/02/2016 09:49

I would complain. That's awful. Your poor DS :(

Creampastry · 01/02/2016 09:50

Bloody hell you should complain. This is disgraceful, Yabu if you don't bring this to the head and governors attention.

Arfarfanarf · 01/02/2016 09:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Givinguph0pe · 01/02/2016 09:51

Ds has had 100% attendance but anyway I know it wasn't that as the class teacher would have told me.
I know they may have had a numbers cap but they could have chosen in a fairer way I think. If he only had to chose a few children to take it would have been different but instead he chose a few children to exclude.

OP posts:
honeysucklejasmine · 01/02/2016 09:51

I think it probably worth bringing up. If nothing else just because of the effect it has had on your DCs attitude towards PE.

But also... You are spot on when you say "take less than half or all"

notenoughbottle · 01/02/2016 09:56

Leaving out six is wrong especially when they appear to have the SN that you have mentioned. 18 is not a small group and given that you have already broached it with the class teacher and not hit anywhere then I would most definitely approach the HT. If an actual small group had been chosen then the other children would unfortunately just have to suck it up but this seems almost discriminatory.

averylongtimeago · 01/02/2016 09:59

I had hoped that this kind of behaviour by PE teachers had died out, but obviously not. I would complain, 18 out of 24 is not a small number and the children were obviously not selected at random. If there were only a limited number of spaces, then fine but the choice should be fair and open, not just leaving out those who may not be as "good" at PE.

BonnieBeaumont · 01/02/2016 10:05

As a Deputy Head I would not think you were being at all unreasonable in bringing this to the attention of the SMT.

Felyne · 01/02/2016 10:06

"Chosen names out of a hat" - yeah, I'd guess 6 names never made it into the hat to start with...
Agree with others who say fewer than half the kids or all of them.

Vagndidit · 01/02/2016 10:08

Are you sure there isn't a special sports day planned for the 6 that were not chosen in the near future?

My DS is dyspraxic and was sent on a special sports afternoon with a few hand-selected children from his school, mainly those with similar coordination difficulties, asd, physical limitations, etc. I went along on the trip (am on staff at the same school) and thought it was a really well planned, low-pressure, non-competitive event that was all about enjoying sport---which, if I'm being honest, sometimes gets lost in other athletic events.

Fizrim · 01/02/2016 10:09

I thinkI'd raise that - too few left behind IMO. As you say, not a 'small group' at all.

PirateSmile · 01/02/2016 10:12

I thought education had moved beyond this sort of thing. What really matters here is your ds reaction to it and because of that, I would definitely flag it up with the school.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 01/02/2016 10:13

Chosen the names out of a hat my arse hole.
It's very "convenient and coincidental" that the only children whose names are not pulled out are. 2 asthmatic children, A child with autism, an over weight child and of course your DS who has Dyspraxia.

I don't think Ofsted would be too thrilled either. They're shit hot on inclusion, Well as you probably know

shinynewusername · 01/02/2016 10:18

I usually read these threads and feel sorry for teachers, but in this case YANBU at all, OP. This is really shocking. What a terrible message to send to the excluded children - they have literally been rejected.

PE should be about encouraging all children to be active, not about constantly undermining the self-worth of the less able. The children with asthma or weight problems are actually the ones who can benefit most from exercise.

PosieReturningParker · 01/02/2016 10:21

A small group is definitely less than half, it should have been done by picking names out of a hat if it's not about sports ability.

hazeyjane · 01/02/2016 10:21

Yanbu, that is bloody awful. Do you know any of the parents of the other children? I wonder how they feel.

PosieReturningParker · 01/02/2016 10:21

Out of a hat in front of the children.

Salzundessig · 01/02/2016 10:23

As a primary teacher, I would be appalled at this kind of attitude from a P.E. teacher and would have challenged him/her on it. If that didn't work, I might have mentioned it to the head. As a mum, I defo would. Your poor son!

Nanny0gg · 01/02/2016 10:24

YANBU and you should talk to the HT.

Definitely deliberate discrimination.

Neveradullm0ment · 01/02/2016 10:24

That is so not good! I would complain. We need to encourage all children to be active - this reeks of rejection!

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