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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To this this was rude and very unfestive

65 replies

scottishegg · 27/12/2015 19:18

Myself my husband and 3 children ( 7, 5 and 2) went to his parents to spend Christmas evening with them.
We arrived at 5.45 which due to traffic was a little later than normal though we phoned ahead to explain/apologise.
When we arrived his mother greeted us and told us that my fil and Bil couldn't wait for us and had already eaten, she then prepared a nice Christmas meal but told us that eastenders was on at 7 and she didn't want to miss it.
My fil came downstairs about half an hour later to tell my mil that not only had she missed emmerdale but she would miss eastenders if she didn't hurry up. He said a very quick merry Christmas and that was that.

My husband explained to his parents that they had sky plus and could record the shows they wanted though this went on deaf ears.

At 7 on the dot his mum went upstairs where they watch tv and didn't come back down the rest of the evening not even for half an hour. We eventually went to bed at 11.

After such a fun filled Christmas Day it did spoil it for me and the children as they were coined to one room as not to disturb them and they were really bored.

A factor in this is that his parents are in their early 80s and are rather set in their ways. Am Aibu to be reluctant to want to spend Xmas day with them next year and possibly go a couple of days before or after!

OP posts:
Original poster
scottishegg · 27/12/2015 19:20

#confined

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ffs78 · 27/12/2015 19:25

I think that might be wise. Nobody's fault here - they're just of the age where they like their routine and don't adapt or cope well to the needs of visitors, especially young children. Chalk it up to experience and do things differently next year.

Fugghetaboutit · 27/12/2015 19:26

Isn't eastenders an hour long max? Why didn't they come back down?!

HackerFucker22 · 27/12/2015 19:27

How late were you?

Original poster
scottishegg · 27/12/2015 19:29

I have no idea. Only thing I can think is they are set in their ways they have 2 living rooms downstairs one with a tv in but they tend to watch tv upstairs in bed.

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Original poster
scottishegg · 27/12/2015 19:30

We were about 45 minutes late

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Original poster
scottishegg · 27/12/2015 19:31

This was due to traffic we phoned as soon as we realised we would be late.

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90sforever · 27/12/2015 19:32

My parents would be like this (not necessarily about TV but the not waiting) they just wouldn't think it's rude as they don't place massive value on formal family meals and also expect everyone to be as organised as them

theycallmemellojello · 27/12/2015 19:32

Were they upset you hadn't spent the day with them?

Oysterbabe · 27/12/2015 19:34

My parents are the same and in their 60s.
My brother hosted a few years back and I stayed at my parents place and travelled over with them. They insisted we left at about 6 so they didn't miss their programs Hmm
I'd hoped for a fun evening playing some games but ended up reading my book while they watched shite at 400 decibels.

Original poster
scottishegg · 27/12/2015 19:35

We offered for them to come up my husband offered to collect them but they declined. We also offered to come over for the day on Christmas Eve but she insisted on seeing us Xmas day as they go out on Xmas eve.

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JenniferYellowHat1980 · 27/12/2015 19:38

Elderly and set in their ways or not, this was downright rude and I wouldn't be hurrying back at all and under no circumstances at Christmas. Was this out of the ordinary?

greenfolder · 27/12/2015 19:44

Next year, don't bother with them Xmas day. In fact tell them this in the next week or so whilst it is fresh in your memory.

shazzarooney99 · 27/12/2015 19:47

They are old and set in theyre own ways, just go along wih it after all you dont know how long you have left with them xxxx

abbsismyhero · 27/12/2015 19:51

you were forty five minutes late? sounds like it would have been crap even if you hadn't been late

ghnocci · 27/12/2015 19:52

Eastenders wasn't on at 7 on Xmas day, it was on at 8:45

Badders123 · 27/12/2015 19:53

Well I would not be going back next year.
How very rude.
Age is no excuse.

Original poster
scottishegg · 27/12/2015 19:54

Omg this is honestly what she said unless I'm getting confused with emmerdale what time was emmerdale on out of interest!

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NickNacks · 27/12/2015 19:56

6.45 Hmm

Original poster
scottishegg · 27/12/2015 19:56

Just checked listings she must have meant emmerdale!

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MuttonWasAGoose · 27/12/2015 19:56

They're in their 80's and you were late. They prepared a special meal for you, which was nice. I think it's not a big deal.

I hope I am cut slack if I'm lucky enough to live that long.

Ringadingdingdong · 27/12/2015 19:56

YANBU I'd have been really pissed off. OK you were late, but you phoned ahead and 45mins is not that long. I would refuse to go next year, go a few days after just for the day. Very rude of them, age is no excuse.

shazzarooney99 · 27/12/2015 20:01

You all say age is no excuse? excuse or what? you dont know how long these people have left in them, my mother died 8 weeks ago, she was 63, so to e 80 and welcoming people around and doing meals for them is absolutely fantastic.

Fairylea · 27/12/2015 20:02

How strange! They can't have been watching tv all that time....! (Maybe they had sex instead?!) How weird and incredibly rude of them.

Original poster
scottishegg · 27/12/2015 20:02

I presume then she meant emmerdale and stayed to watch eastenders and when my fil came down at 7 it was cos she had missed the start of emmerdale. I don't follow the soaps!

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