To think Dp has a cheek

[onedarkdecembermorning]

His birthday is tomorrow, he's been unemployed for 9 months so I've been working 2 jobs. Thing is he's barely tried to get a job.

So - he wants £60

WIBU to tell him to sod off?

I don't know why you need to ask!

Unless your two jobs are heart surgeon and international jewel thief, then you can't afford a sixty pound gift.

Tell him to sod off.
When he has a job, you'll give him a £60 birthday present.

Yanbu. Tell him you don't have £60

Tell him to do one, and dump the cockloger while you are at it.

Well you can either afford it or you can't. And you can decide whether or not you want to give it to him or not. People shouldn't really choose their birthday presents, especially money.

What has he been doing for 9 months? Do you have children? Is he looking after them?

Agh I can feel my rage rise up on your behalf. Please tell him to sod off.

Does he at least take care of your home whilst you work 2 jobs?

Tell him to fuck off and get a job. Has he got any valid reason for not having one? If not, lazy selfish entitled reject.

Blu-tac 60 1p pieces in to a card...

And tell us all about his redeeming features?

Is he a stay at home parent? Does he contribute by saving costs on childcare etc?

Shocked at some of the answers -it's not always so easy to get a job when you've been out of work for a while.

If you can afford £60 then it's not a big deal - I don't see the issue with it. Not sure why him not working has anything to do with the value of his birthday present.

Peggy...OP said her dp has barely tried to look for a job. So yes, it's not always so easy to get a job when you don't even look for one.

We don't have children.

The house ... slightly contentious one, I have to admit it needs a LOT of work and of course that costs money. I do feel he could buy and change light bulbs though

It is hard to get work. He's sort of got a job - through an agency but gets next to no shifts. When he does he WHINES about it.

It's always rude to ask for money for your birthday! Even more so when you specify a certain amount!
But it sounds like this is the tip of the iceberg?

Why don't you just leave him? Doesn't sound like a partnership, does it.

Not really that simple :) but thanks for confirming I am not BU!

Get rid.

Giving your partner money for a birthday is an odd present anyway, but we have joint finances.

Who owns the house? I'd leave him and sell up as necessary and rent a nice little flat for a while or join a fun houseshare. Then I'd meet someone lovely who has a job and start again with a smile on my face.

Those options aren't doable but thanks :)

If you could leave him, would you want too or do you just want a moan because he's shit hot in bed and he's better than nothing?

People will help if you want it.

So if he's with an agency is he not claiming JSA?

He's not no sooty, and TBF he does generally get maybe one shift a week, buf while I kmow jobs are thin on the ground we are actually in quite a densely populated area and he's trained in something where work is always available, admittedly not always the best pay or conditions but more than the dole, you know. It's so irritating. Anyway just wanted a rant.

No, you are not being unreasonable if he isn't working in the home either.

He isn't going to change you know. It would be better if you were in a relationship with someone you respected.

Certainly sounds as though he could be trying harder then.