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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Another kids party one!!

70 replies

kappadelta · 13/10/2015 10:06

DD brought home an invite to another girls party in her class last night. Unfortunately it's the same date and time as my DD's and the invites are going into school in the morning.
What would you do?

OP posts:
molyholy · 13/10/2015 10:07

Have you booked anything specific for it?

Sirzy · 13/10/2015 10:07

Can you change your party? Even by a couple of hours? (Obviously that depends on where the party is)

WorraLiberty · 13/10/2015 10:09

Is it a whole class party, or just a few of her actual friends?

If it's the latter, it might not matter too much unless the same kids get invited to both.

Original poster
kappadelta · 13/10/2015 10:09

It's specific a play area.

OP posts:
Original poster
kappadelta · 13/10/2015 10:12

I think a lot of the children may have been invited to both x

OP posts:
nilbyname · 13/10/2015 10:14

One of you will have to change or both girls will be disappointed? Can you change the time f yours? Can you talk to the mum?

I would say to my dd-
No party- you'll already be going to that one. Let's do a cinema trip and pizza out with 4 friends instead?

LifeIsChaos · 13/10/2015 10:16

I'd ring the venue and try to change the time or day if it's the same children being invited.

PumpkinPie2013 · 13/10/2015 10:20

Can you change the day of your dd's party? Explain that X is having a party on that day (which dd is going to?) and lots of children will find it difficult to do both parties?

Having it on the same day, even at a different time might make it difficult for parents to get children to both parties and do whatever else they need to do.

Hairyfairy01 · 13/10/2015 10:22

Other parent got the invites out first so you either need to change the date of yours or ask if other parent fancies doing a joint party if it's a whole class thing.

Whoknewitcouldbeso · 13/10/2015 10:25

I think you are going to have to rearrange or accept that you might not get the numbers you ate expecting and it might turn into a popularity contest.

Original poster
kappadelta · 13/10/2015 10:26

I think I may have been a little naughty as it was a reverse situation ??
The other mum sent her little girls invites out 2 days after mine however I had no idea as my daughter didn't get an invite.

OP posts:
CrapBag · 13/10/2015 10:29

You need to rearrange as the other party will be accepted first and your DD will be the one left with not many children able to attend.

Either see if you can change the time or change the day.

We almost had this in year 1, sent DS's invites out, his best friends mum caught me the next day in a panic saying her DS's party was booked for the same day, luckily it turned out there was a gap of an hour in between so it was a rush but all the children who were invited to both did go to both. The other mum did say she thought she was going to ha E to change hers as our invites went out first.

CrapBag · 13/10/2015 10:31

Oh, did the other mum see your invite? If she did then that's bad form I think and she should have changed hers. I'm assuming she is turning it in to a popularity contest and may well try and accost parents in person to get them to commit to her party.

DoJo · 13/10/2015 10:31

Was the other girl invited to your daughter's party?

brokenvases · 13/10/2015 10:32

Someone did this to me years ago. My daughter has SN so didnt usually have parties. At seven she decided she really wanted one. She invited 15 children. 12 accepted, parents of child 2 didnt rsvp.

A week before dds party child 2 sent out invites to 20 children including all of dds invited for the same day and time but at a venue of a lifetime type place.

10 of the 12 cancelled dds Sad

RoganJosh · 13/10/2015 10:34

OP's invitations haven't gone out yet, by my understanding.

RoganJosh · 13/10/2015 10:35

Oh now I've seen the update and am confused.

Original poster
kappadelta · 13/10/2015 10:36

Crapbag - love the name.
This all happened last week. I was aware that invites went out to another party after mine but had no idea whose. My little girl told me that she hadn't got one and I explained that you don't always get invited.

I thought nothing more of it until yesterday when I had a number of parents decline. However one did elaborate to say that her child was going to another party. I replied that I hope I hadn't clashed with anyone in the class to which she replied yes.

OP posts:
Original poster
kappadelta · 13/10/2015 10:37

Sorry Rogan I thought I would be all cool and do one of those reverse threads ??
My invites went out first the other mums 2 days later.

OP posts:
Original poster
kappadelta · 13/10/2015 10:38

DoJo - yes I invited the other child.

OP posts:
KitZacJak · 13/10/2015 10:40

Did you invite the other girl to your daughter's party? If so the mother should have known and changed her party. If not she had no way of knowing either.

Original poster
kappadelta · 13/10/2015 10:41

KitZac - yes I invited the other child.

OP posts:
DoJo · 13/10/2015 10:41

Hmm, so she knew that there was another party and continued with her plans. Are there enough children in the class to feasibly make up two parties? Are you able to talk to her to see if you could combine them or run them together to ensure that nobody is left out? Whilst I agree with the posters who said that you/she should change the details, now that it's done I think being the bigger person and making an effort to ensure that the children both have lovely parties is probably paramount.

LucyBabs · 13/10/2015 10:42

"Broken* your story gave me a lump in my throat. Your poor dd Sad
What did you do in the end?

kappa
Had many RSVP for your dd's party? Was the other child invited to your dd's party?

LucyBabs · 13/10/2015 10:42

Cross Post sorry!