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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

WIBU on this hen night?

59 replies

comediewithme · 21/07/2014 10:35

I was invited to a hen night, was told it was £25 and bride would be taking the money on the night.

I arrived and went on the night out last weekend. Obviously the bride had everyone buzzing around her so I waited for a quiet moment as she was outside having a cigarette and offered her the money. I only had £30. I said Sorry I haven't got the change, take the £30 and just have the fiver extra as drink money. I was pretty adamant about this as I didnt want her to be out of pocket on her hen. She told me, No no no, save it and give it to me another time.

Fine I thought, I will see her in the week so will give it to her then. However on sunday morning her fiance posted a really horrible FB update about people expecting a night out for free I messaged and said I hope you don't mean me, and he said yes, I mean you. I explained about my conversation with the bride and he said I should have forced her to take the money.

Anyway, I dropped a card round that day with the exact money in it saying sorry but perhaps I misunderstood when she said she was happy to wait until another time for it, and I havent heard another word from her on the subject. She has text about other things like meeting up but nothing about the card or the money

WIBU?

OP posts:

ThinkIveBeenHacked · 21/07/2014 10:36

YWNBU at all.

Id be fucking livid.

StrawberryCheese · 21/07/2014 10:37

That is very odd. Do you think she may forgotten your conversation on the night, if she had a lot to drink perhaps?

Birdsgottafly · 21/07/2014 10:37

It's n

asmallandnoisymonkey · 21/07/2014 10:38

No, I don't think YWBU, her fiance sounds like a right charmer.

Panzee · 21/07/2014 10:38

He's a dick, she might be embarrassed, which is why she's not mentioned it.

Anniegetyourgun · 21/07/2014 10:38

Worth dropping her a line to make sure she got the money? Dog may have eaten it/fiance may have binned it not realising it had money inside/random unlikely scenario?

BlinkingHeck · 21/07/2014 10:40

No you were not. Her fiance is unreasonable.

scarletforya · 21/07/2014 10:40

What an ignorant bitch. I'd drop her like a stone for that. She set you up there.

Birdsgottafly · 21/07/2014 10:41

Sorry, it was non of his business, but to take this into FB was pathetic.

Perhaps she went gone and had a rant, if she was drunk then he may have took it the wrong way.

But it still didn't warrant him making this public, or taking it that far.

What's he like in general and how long have they been together?

Because that's the behaviour of someone who wants to seperate their Psrtner from their friends, tbh.

I'd speak to your friend seperatly, she should aknowledge that he was wrong, at least.

Tinkerball · 21/07/2014 10:42

What a right pair, they deserve each other.

Littleturkish · 21/07/2014 10:43

How horrible! Her fiancé sounds nasty. YWNBU.

Original poster

comediewithme · 21/07/2014 10:43

Given his previous reaction to not getting the money, I am pretty sure I would have heard if they didn't get it! I don't think she forgot, she wasnt that drunk. I mean, even if she did forget I explained to him too, so that might have jogged her memory.

OP posts:

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 21/07/2014 10:44

What a cow, and what a twat he is.

mindthegap79 · 21/07/2014 10:46

This is probably a silly question, but does she actually know about his message? He might have asked if everyone paid and she might have saud something like 'x hasn't paid yet' but not explained, and he got the wrong end of the stick?

He's clearly a twat either way, and I too would be livid.

mindthegap79 · 21/07/2014 10:47

I'd definitely want to discuss it with her - I wouldn't leave it.

Original poster

comediewithme · 21/07/2014 10:47

Its pretty obvious she was bitching about me too, isn't it. She hates any sort of confrontation, so I will probably never get her to admit anything, or accept that he was an arsehole.

OP posts:

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 21/07/2014 10:47

He's a huge tit and she's bloody rude not to have acknowledged your card and dropping off the money.

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 21/07/2014 10:48

Are you invited to the wedding?

AnotherGirlsParadise · 21/07/2014 10:50

Wow, holy passive aggressive, Batman. He sounds like an absolute knob. Maybe the bride knew he'd be pissed off with her for not taking the money on the night, so tried to cover her own ass and laid the blame at your door. Either way, YWNBU (I don't see how you could even think you were) and he's a rude piece of shit.

Staryyeyedsurprise · 21/07/2014 10:52

I wonder if she meant "give it to me later on in the night" even though that wasn't clear from what she said?

But yes, he was BU to get involved and then publicly give out to you. Your friend was BU to let him. I'd bin the pair of them, I really would.

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 21/07/2014 10:53

I'd send a text along the lines of not appreciating her fiancé slagging you off about money you offered to pay at the time, and remind her that it was her decision you pay her later and you also don't appreciate her bitching to him about it.

Something like that but worded better.

SanityClause · 21/07/2014 10:55

Why is it even any of the fiance's business?

Either she's had a moan to him about it, not giving all the facts, so you come off looking bad, or he's made her account for every penny, and had a strop when she can't.

It sounds very odd to me.

QueenofallIsee · 21/07/2014 10:56

I would not under any circumstances tolerate that kind of shit. What a pair of wankers they are.

OnlyLovers · 21/07/2014 11:03

I'd send a text like Pobble suggests.

And then unfriend her and her arsehole fiance and consider yourself well rid.

Are you good friends?

Original poster

comediewithme · 21/07/2014 11:05

I am invited to the wedding. Maybe they want me to decline so they can give my place to someone else

OP posts:

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