WIBU on this hen night?

[comediewithme]

I was invited to a hen night, was told it was £25 and bride would be taking the money on the night.

I arrived and went on the night out last weekend. Obviously the bride had everyone buzzing around her so I waited for a quiet moment as she was outside having a cigarette and offered her the money. I only had £30. I said Sorry I haven't got the change, take the £30 and just have the fiver extra as drink money. I was pretty adamant about this as I didnt want her to be out of pocket on her hen. She told me, No no no, save it and give it to me another time.

Fine I thought, I will see her in the week so will give it to her then. However on sunday morning her fiance posted a really horrible FB update about people expecting a night out for free I messaged and said I hope you don't mean me, and he said yes, I mean you. I explained about my conversation with the bride and he said I should have forced her to take the money.

Anyway, I dropped a card round that day with the exact money in it saying sorry but perhaps I misunderstood when she said she was happy to wait until another time for it, and I havent heard another word from her on the subject. She has text about other things like meeting up but nothing about the card or the money

WIBU?

I imagine your friend must have been really moaning to her dp for him to do that but still a wanky childish thing to do, they sound like a pair of right dicks who are well suited to each other

YANBU. She totally made this problem for herself by not sorting it out at the time when it was easy. If she was collecting £25 from everyone on the night, surely she could have either (a) have given you change from the fivers she was surely collecting, unless you were the very first person to offer to pay, which it sounds like you weren't; or (b) said, 'Thanks, that's great, let me give you the change when I get some more in - oh, look, there's Becky/Sarah/Mavis, hey, Becky, have you got that £25, I need a fiver...'. Or (c) the gracious option, 'thank you, that's really kind, what'll you have to drink?'

You can't force money onto adults unless you start tucking it into their clothing. And I assume that's not the look she was going for on her hen night. Bride and groom sound like a right pair of charmers in their own equally charming ways. The FB pass agg stuff says it all.

I'd ditch the pair of them!

Certainly wouldn't be going to the wedding.

Do you have to be friends with her? He sounds absolutely awful and frankly she doesn't sound much better.

No way I'd be going to the wedding.

Although I wouldn't tell them that. I'd just not turn up. So that whatever they have spent on catering for you is totally wasted and not given to someone else they can persuade to attend last minute because "someone can't come"

Ha ha NotNewButNameChanged - can you imagine the Facebook comments after that...

I'd go to the wedding - if they're like this about the hen, imagine how hilariously unreasonable they'll be on the day

I like LittleTurkish's suggestion. YANBU.

The scenario I'm imagining, given what you've said about his aggressive twattishness and her avoidance of conflict is as follows ...

Her : I've got to go to the cash machine on the way out today.
Him : WHAT? You had £xxx out only yesterday!
Her : Yes but I ended up paying for comediewithme last night ..
Him : What a freeloader! What a f***g liberty (a la Catherine Tait's "Gran")!

She's in for a bumpy ride with that one, mark my words.