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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that DC not eating enough at CM?

110 replies

Fiveleaves · 21/02/2014 08:11

Toddler with CM for first 3 days of week as I work pt. have noticed that often when she gets back she heads straight to kitchen and points at the cupboard where her snacks are kept and gets quite frustrated, clearly hungry. She has all meals with CM. on Tuesday I got to CM early to pick toddler up as finished meeting early and the kids were having tea. It was just plain pasta with broccoli and chopped carrot (cubed so assume from frozen). No protein, no fat. In her food diary it said cheese, ham, veg pasta bake with yoghurt and fruit for dessert but they didn't have the dessert and there was no ham or cheese and it wasn't a 'bake' which sounds a lot more wholesome.

She also has things listed in food diary that I know she has gone off such as banana so wonder if she is actually eating this.

AIBU to think toddler isn't eating enough with CM and WWYD?

OP posts:
CookieLady · 21/02/2014 08:14

Did you ask CM why your DD wasn't having pasta bake that evening as stated in the diary? I'd also make a point of turning up early a different times to get a feel for what's going on.

Sirzy · 21/02/2014 08:18

There could have been a very good reason why she had to change from what is planned.

You would need to know a whole days meal before judging whether it was enough anyway.

Try talking to the childminder?

Original poster
Fiveleaves · 21/02/2014 08:20

No, I didn't check diary until I got home but am going to have to confront this aren't i? DD loves going to CM so I hope it as just a one off but DD does always seem hungry as I say. Will have to get there early again as you suggest. I have asked in roundabout ways about whether DD eating ok as quite fussy at home and off the cuff comments such as 'I can't believe you can get her to eat carrots, she won't touch them at home' etc

OP posts:
MusicalEndorphins · 21/02/2014 08:21

I agree, I would mention the observation, and regardless of the reason why the menu was changed, I'd show up at meal times.

Without any protein in her meal she probably is hungry.

Original poster
Fiveleaves · 21/02/2014 08:23

Yes Sirzy I am hoping it's so one off and CM had run out of cheese, ham, yoghurt and fruitb(seems unlikely to have misjudged all of this).

Toddlers need a portion of fat and protein with every meal though so if not ham then substitute with a fish finger or some beans. It wasn't a complete meal suitable for a growing, active toddler.

OP posts:
Original poster
Fiveleaves · 21/02/2014 08:24

Musical endorphins, exactly, I would be starving if I didn't have protein with every meal and I sit at a desk all day!

OP posts:
ForgettableTampon · 21/02/2014 08:24

There is protein in broccoli and pasta, not sure about carrots; she may well have buttered the veg.

DD might be too busy to eat much, rather preferring a few mouthfuls before skipping back to activities

Do ask the CM

Original poster
Fiveleaves · 21/02/2014 08:38

Yeah forgettable, I just wonder why the listed food was different and whether other meals are not accurately recorded...

OP posts:
NickNacks · 21/02/2014 08:42

I'm a cm and have many children that eat things with me that they don't eat at home. Parents can't believe it so I photograph it for them!

BrokenToeOuch · 21/02/2014 08:48

I would query it. If you hadn't got there early you would be none the wiser. It's possible it was a last minute change of plan, but if she is coming home hungry regularly then it would make me think she wasn't eating enough throughout the day. Not suggesting that the CM is starving her, there are loads of reasons she may not be eating much with her.
I would broach it with the CM, say you were wondering how much she realistically eats as she is coming home still hungry.

winterlace · 21/02/2014 08:51

There might be a good reason as to why she deviated from the plan but a good reason to lie about it in the food diary? Sorry but it sounds as if she's cutting back money and the children are going hungry as a result.

Original poster
Fiveleaves · 21/02/2014 08:52

NickNacks yeah, that's what CM said when I asked about carrot! I just don't want DD getting fobbed off with a bit of pasta and frozen veg. When we found CM she talked about wholesome food and we thought that justified the £70 a day (plus the fact she opens at 7.30 am). The quality of the food should reflect what we pay but that isn't the key issue here, it is DD's health.

I'm no wonder cook but I make veg muffins, homemade pizza etc the night before for DD and was hoping for more wholesome food at CM and more importantly, enough food to fill DD up...

OP posts:
Jinty64 · 21/02/2014 08:54

I would point out to the childminder that the meal you saw her having was not what was in her food diary and, whilst you realise that occasionally she may have to change the menu, you would like this changed in your dd's food diary so that you can balance what she has for the rest of the week. Ask her to document how much of the meal she has eaten each time.

The problem is you really have to trust totally the person/people looking after your child and if you can't then they are not the right people.

NickNacks · 21/02/2014 08:55

I wouldn't give dessert if a parent has arrived to collect. I'd get the child rest to go home after their meal and mum can give dessert. I hate people watching me eat.

MidniteScribbler · 21/02/2014 08:55

I would approach her about it. I had that problem recently when DS changed daycares and it turned out that they weren't offering a second helping if they cleared their plate at lunchtime (DS would often have 2-3 helpings at his old daycare). They now offer him more food and his dinner has gone back to more normal amounts of food intake. My theory is that you pay a lot of money for childcare and you have the right to question them if something seems 'off'.

Jinty64 · 21/02/2014 08:56

£70 a day - bloody hell - I would want the Ritz for that. Change childminder or look for a good nursery.

NickNacks · 21/02/2014 08:58

Bloody hell. £70pd. !!

I charge £45 all inclusive in the south east and occasionally do a cheapy meal (jacket potatoes or pasta with pesto) but I have a menu on the notice board and Stick to it.

TidyDancer · 21/02/2014 09:00

Even young children can be subject to peer pressure wrt eating, so it's quite likely that she is eating things at the CM's house that she wouldn't eat at home just because the other children are.

That said, I wouldn't be happy about different food items to what she's actually having appearing in the diary. A couple more surprise meal time visits should give you a good idea of whether this is something you need to take more seriously.

MissyO · 21/02/2014 09:01

What a coincidence that it was the more expensive items that were missing !
A bag of value frozen broccoli and carrots and value pasta cost next to nothing to buy and a lot quicker to prepare.I think you have caught her out!

Original poster
Fiveleaves · 21/02/2014 09:01

Thanks for feedback. Central London Jinty, ranges from 55 to 75 round these parts but most open at 8 and I need to be at work for 8.30.

The thing is nicknacks, I was the only patent who got there early and none of the kids had dessert...

OP posts:
PostmanPatAlwaysRingsTwice · 21/02/2014 09:01

£70! What's the hourly rate? I live in an expensive city and they're mostly around £4.50ph here.

Agree you should ask the cm about this meal.

Bonsoir · 21/02/2014 09:03

Pasta, broccoli and carrots is not a balanced meal by any stretch of the imagination and I am not surprised your DC is hungry! Definitely question this and talk about protein.

NickNacks · 21/02/2014 09:05

I'm not trying to make excuses for her! Were they not also eating their dinner? I have a little one that often gets picked up early and I don't get the dessert out units he's gone otherwise he kicks off and mum takes ages to leave as it is.

Coconutty · 21/02/2014 09:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Gileswithachainsaw · 21/02/2014 09:09

I think for that price Heston should be cooking the pasta bake!!!

There could be any number of reasons I guess but a pasta bake doesn't take long to prepare , as a CM surely she's used to prepping in advance and stuff so if really shouldn't have been too hard to throw a decent meal together.

If I was paying that much I would not he happy with frozen veg and pasta. No way.

But do find out first as there is a chance there was an emergency