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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU - DPs Annual Ball.

77 replies

ImAnElfJeSuisUneElf · 10/12/2013 19:35

Short and snappy, tries and quite lighthearted. Grin

DPs annual ball is free for him to attend (the company pays)

If I go with him, it costs £25 for my seat/dinner.

The arranged rate with the hotel is £100 - so £50 each.

DP is insisting I pay for my meal, and my half of the hotel as he doesn't want to go alone.

I personally, am not all that fussed, but having been told that, not only do I have to pay to hold his hand, I'm paying MORE than him, to attend HIS do, I've decide that I won't bother.

I offered to go halves on my meal so it was an equal split, he wasn't interested.

He things I'm being a cow now, I think I'm being entirely reasonable. GrinGrin

AIBU?

OP posts:
QuacksForDoughnuts · 10/12/2013 19:40

YANBU if he's the one pushing you to go and you're not bothered. If you'd been insisting on going it would have been more reasonable of him to expect you to cough up.

Chottie · 10/12/2013 19:41

I think that if he wants you to attend, he should at least pay for your ticket. I've never heard of companies charging OHs for attending an annual ball before.

Chottie · 10/12/2013 19:42

p.s. you are NOT a cow and please tell DP I said so.......

BohemianGirl · 10/12/2013 19:42

'P' - no way - sorry, as light hearted as your thread is , no woman pays to spend a night with a bloke.

FitzgeraldProtagonist · 10/12/2013 19:47

Wtf - why would you pay anything?! Xx

Original poster
ImAnElfJeSuisUneElf · 10/12/2013 19:47

It's his job, his colleagues, his whole 'thing', I genuinely don't understand why I need to pay more than him to attend.

OP posts:
SybilRamkin · 10/12/2013 19:50

What?? You're being massively generous offering to pay for anything given that it's his bloody do - YANBU at all, he's being an arse!

magesticmallow · 10/12/2013 19:52

YABU to be with someone so tight, I could not be in a relationship where money was so calculated. YANBU to not go

Whocansay · 10/12/2013 19:52

So, he wants you to do him a favour and pay for the privilege? He's an arse.

Given that the event is likely to be tedious at best, he should be paying for you to go and doing so gladly!

ZillionChocolate · 10/12/2013 19:53

I think it would be reasonable for you to pay the additional cost in you attending. You pay £25, he pays £100.

chipshop · 10/12/2013 19:54

My DP would definitely pay for me to go, he'd be so grateful! And vice versa. You are totally in the right.

AnUnearthlyChild · 10/12/2013 19:54

Wtf - why would you pay anything?! Xx

Quite.

He wants you there. He coughs up. What a tightwad. To put it in context Dh has offered to pay for me to go to my own work do. on my own, partners not invited because I didn't want to pay any more out this month ( I may have overspent on my share of personal spends a little this month)

Chlorinella · 10/12/2013 19:55

He should be paying for you

IceNoSlice · 10/12/2013 19:55

I think he should pay for all your costs!

tinkertitonk · 10/12/2013 19:55

At £25 the dinner and drink will be filthy.

Don't go.

IceNoSlice · 10/12/2013 19:56

(In the context of the work do, I mean, not everything ever).

Original poster
ImAnElfJeSuisUneElf · 10/12/2013 19:56

I really don't mind paying something towards, it's the paying MORE that really riles me! Grin

OP posts:
HairyPorter · 10/12/2013 19:57

Agree he should pay for your ticket. Maybe consider going halves on the hotel?

Pinupgirl · 10/12/2013 19:57

I would be dumping this dp sharpish-I can't abide tight gits.

Original poster
ImAnElfJeSuisUneElf · 10/12/2013 19:57

iceno GrinGrin

OP posts:
AndHarry · 10/12/2013 19:57

He should be paying for everything for the both of you. Why would you be paying for anything? Confused

conclusionjumper · 10/12/2013 19:57

What a tightwad. It must be hard to keep your hands off him. He wants you to come, he pays your ticket and the hotel. I would say politely that you don't really like the way the arrangements are being made and the emphasis on money, so you'll bow out this time, to avoid a blood
bath a row.

Lifeisaboxofchocs · 10/12/2013 19:57

and they say romance is dead.

Thisisaghostlyeuphemism · 10/12/2013 19:59

That really is incredibly tight.

BohemianGirl · 10/12/2013 19:59

I am laughins my non existent bollocks off how feminism flies right out of the window when it comes to women stumping up half the bill!

No no and no again - be 1950's house wife in servitude and make him pay

I'm also appalled at anyones DH "subbing" a partners work do because she has over spent on 'personal spends'. Its grim

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