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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to think that it's inappropriate to joke that ...

67 replies

Lessthanaballpark · 10/05/2013 17:05

the Ohio situation was "a sexual fantasy for both sides"

OTOH I want to think IABU because I see this person regularly and he's an otherwise lovely person and of course he was only joking but OTOH it made me feel physically sick and uncomfortable.

OP posts:
CheerfulYank · 10/05/2013 17:07

Why would anyone say that?

Fenton · 10/05/2013 17:08

WHAT?

That is not a 'joke'. He is not a lovely person to think or utter that.

Chipschipschips · 10/05/2013 17:10

YABU, it would only be inappropriate if he said to the victims or those close to them.

TakingTheStairs · 10/05/2013 17:14

YANBU

It is insensitive and disgusting. Even if it is not said directly to the victims or those close to them, you never know who has experienced abuse in their lives and how it may upset someone, so any sort of "joke" about any kind of abuse/rape is in very poor taste.

Fenton · 10/05/2013 17:15

I strongly disagree Chips, it's inappropriate to even think it IMO.

Those poor girls.

pleasestoptalking · 10/05/2013 17:17

I think that reveals quite a sinister way of thinking to be honest. You should have pulled him up on it at the time.

These women were children when they were abducted and were routinely raped and violently abused. I would have a serious sense of humour failure about that.

At the very least it shows a lack of compassion and human empathy.

NoelHeadbands · 10/05/2013 17:17

I'm not sure how you get a joke out of that ?

SchroSawMargeryDaw · 10/05/2013 17:17

Chips Are you being serious? Do you actually think it's okay to say that about victims of kidnap, imprisonment and rape?

YANBU - That's just not a joke, it's sick.

Chipschipschips · 10/05/2013 17:18

Well obviously "those poor girls" but there's nothing wrong with making a joke about appalling things.

Chipschipschips · 10/05/2013 17:19

"At the very least it shows a lack of compassion and human empathy."

Ridiculous statement.

zippey · 10/05/2013 17:19

I would find that comment distasteful. However, one comment does not a personality make, it may have been an off-moment.

Fairypants · 10/05/2013 17:20

I'm sorry to say but I wouldn't look at anyone the same who could say such a thing and think it was funny. It suggests to me there is some moral fibre missing.

SchroSawMargeryDaw · 10/05/2013 17:20

Chips Please explain how what the OP has said could even be described as a joke?

Fenton · 10/05/2013 17:21

Chips you are the one being ridiculous.

Are you a Frankie Boyle fan by any chance?

MardyBra · 10/05/2013 17:21

Of course it's inappropriate and, frankly, quite sick.

Chips - are you Bernard Manning?

OnTheBottomWithAWomansWeekly · 10/05/2013 17:22

Chips but it's not a funny joke - basically it's just saying that the girls were enjoying it? Rape apologist anyone?

(and I have definitely laughed at inappropriate jokes that were actually humourous, this one is just, yuk)

wannabedomesticgoddess · 10/05/2013 17:22

I wouldnt be speaking to him again tbh. Its incomprehensible how wrong that "joke" is.

MardyBra · 10/05/2013 17:22

x post with Fenton. Grin

OnTheBottomWithAWomansWeekly · 10/05/2013 17:22

*humorous

SchroSawMargeryDaw · 10/05/2013 17:22

Fenton I don't even think Frankie Boyle would call that particular comment a joke!

OnTheBottomWithAWomansWeekly · 10/05/2013 17:23

Also there are some situations that aren't really joke material, this one is probably one of them

Alisvolatpropiis · 10/05/2013 17:23

YANBU.

There's nothing funny about that situation. Would take a pretty weird person to think there was.

Fenton · 10/05/2013 17:26

Grin Mardy

I wanted to say 'are you Frankie Boyle?' but thought it might count as a PA.

grimbletart · 10/05/2013 17:27

Yes Chips - must be hilarious joking about women being punched in the stomach to miscarry the rapist's babies. Jeez, what are you on?

MadBusLady · 10/05/2013 17:28

It's not a joke Confused It's just a deeply, deeply weird thing to say. For a joke to work it has to have some basis in truth, or subvert the truth in some way.

I'd definitely be reconsidering my assessment of that person as "lovely".

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