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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be slightly annoyed by the phase 'work hard and get on'

168 replies

LittleTurtle · 20/03/2013 14:00

on the budget speech.

Apparently in reference to SAHM.

The newspapers were slating PM's use of this phrase all today. That SAHM would be excluded from receiving child care support because they do not want to work hard and get on.

I was mostly surprised that the chancellor used this exact same phrase at the budget speech today. I thought they would just erase it after the papers raised concerns from parents about it.

I just find it insulting that people generally think SAHM don't do anything, but just lounge around at home.

OP posts:
Latara · 20/03/2013 14:02

YANBU.

I'm not watching the Budget on purpose because the mere mention of George Osborne sends my BP a bit high (in anger)...

Dawndonna · 20/03/2013 14:03

I work bloody hard. The government pays me £52 a week. How do I get on?

TheOrchardKeeper · 20/03/2013 14:04

I found it really bloody hard when DS was little!! I longed to work & get a few hours to myself & a job that didn't involve puke or match-sticking my eyes open.

No one's safe from scrutiny with this government though, whether it's justified or not (usually not).

Hmm
ChaosTrulyReigns · 20/03/2013 14:05

Surely if a SAHM isn't valued for looking after her children, then a childminder is a lazy arse as well? I think not.

HousewifeFromArimathea · 20/03/2013 14:05

I do lounge around at home. But not as much now since my child benefit has gone Grin

IntheFrame · 20/03/2013 14:05

YANBU - I did work and bloody hard and for bloody long hours.Went back to work straight after having DS. Not only did I not get on but I became ill through the stress of juggling everything after 5 years.

fairylightsinthesnow · 20/03/2013 14:07

but if you are a SAHM you don't need paid child care do you? Am not in any way having a go or a moan or anything else and I am probably missing something obvious but the majority of SAHM's will still be in receipt of child benefit but will not be using childminders or nannies, so why would you need a contribution toward it? Please tell me if I AM being thick - I honestly want to know!! Smile

Areyoumadorisitme · 20/03/2013 14:07

Should SAHMs be eligible for childcare support though, when the purpose of the support is to enable working?

mamij · 20/03/2013 14:10

They really are taking the piss. They don't realise how tough it can be being a SAHM (although I love my two to bits!) - different sets of responsibilities and challengers. And to be honest, I probably wouldn't be a SAHM if I earned more than what I would pay a nursery/childminder/nanny for two children!

Apanicaday · 20/03/2013 14:13

I don't think it's that SAHM expect help with childcare, I think it's more that they would appreciate some recognition/appreciation for what they are doing, rather than the implication that they are all sitting around on their backsides watching Jeremy Kyle all day.

maddening · 20/03/2013 14:31

After 11 years at work having a baby and looking after him was the hardest work I had done - I felt like I'd been hit by a train!

But I agree that sahm does not need financial assistance with childcare - although there was no need for that wording.

meddie · 20/03/2013 14:41

Just the phrase 'work hard and get on' annoys me. Its implies that if you dont continue to progress in life then you haven't worked hard.
Many people work their arses off in NMW jobs, unfortunately not a lot of these jobs have a decent career ladder or opportunity to get on, or the employees maybe don't have the capacity to progress past what they are doing. No amount of 'working hard' will change that.

Goldenbear · 20/03/2013 14:51

Ha, ha, ha- so is that his personal mantra as well- 'work hard and get on' or is a lot of his personal wealth inherited?

StanleyLambchop · 20/03/2013 14:52

My DH was worked hard and got on. Now he earns above the cut-off for child benefit. So we have lost that. Some reward!

WileyRoadRunner · 20/03/2013 14:57

Just the phrase 'work hard and get on' annoys me

Yep ^.

I am too angry to post anything further Angry

reallyyummymummy · 20/03/2013 15:05

Hate the phrase too. It should be banned.

CockyFox · 20/03/2013 15:07

As a SAHM I wouldn't expect help with childcare costs as I don't have any. I don't resent being told to work hard and get on either because I did before I had the children and I will once again when they are all at school. Just like my mum and my nan did, I don't understand people like my MIL who gave up working when they have children and never return to work, those people in my opinion should work hard and get on.
Yes by all means SAH when your children are tiny (and maybe at infant school) but really there is absolutly no reason to SAH after this. And don't cite school holidays as there are 13 weeks of them and a couple get 10 weeks leave between them and 3 weeks (or 4 if you take a week as a family) really isn't that much to cover.

Latara · 20/03/2013 15:12

In this life it seems that if you do ''work hard'' then you can ''get walked on'' ie taken advantage of by unscrupulous employers & certain colleagues i'm afraid to say...

WhenSheWasBadSheWasHopeful · 20/03/2013 15:13

"Work hard and get on" is a bit annoying (sahm work really really hard) but I don't see why sahm should get childcare support though.

Latara · 20/03/2013 15:13

Working hard never did me any good - i just got exacerbated MH issues & a downgrading of my career as a result. :(

catgirl1976 · 20/03/2013 15:18

I work hard.

I was sending work emails before my epidural had worn off (on my work phone), back pt when DS was 4 weeks old and back ft when he was less than 5 months

I am currently signed off sick having had something off a breakdown juggling a job, a toddler, a pt degree and a professional course plus housework, finances etc
.

Maybe it should be "Work hard and get on beta blockers"? :)

Pigsmummy · 20/03/2013 15:19

Isn't he referring to people working though? If you are a sahm then you aren't "in work" and can't progress your career? (unless you choose child care as an option but then would be "in work" not sahm) No one is disputing that looking after children is demanding but you are not employed by the government or your children are you? I am on maternity leave currently and I consider it as leave, I am not working currently am I? so isn't it the same for a sahm, you are not "in work".

Pigsmummy · 20/03/2013 15:22

Catgirl were you forced to send emails whilst on mat leave and do your company not have a policy about minimum time off? If they did and there isn't the you a very good constructive dismissal claim (if employed in the UK).

BionicEmu · 20/03/2013 15:23

I really would love to "work hard and get on" when my current maternity leave finishes.

However:
My take-home pay = £59 per day.
Childcare for 2 children = £84 per day
Commuting costs = £8 per day.

Unfortunately £84+£8 = £92.

And £92-£59 = £33. Yes, it will actually cost us £33 per day for me to go back to work.

catgirl1976 · 20/03/2013 15:26

Pigsmuumy

Not overtly forced and nothing in writing....just a lot of pressure verbally so I think it would be hard to prove

No policy on minimum time off though