Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

yay I earn £2100 per month...

152 replies

CeceliaStrange · 06/02/2013 11:55

into London, better paid job.

Nursery costs for 2= £2400 (£2600 at another)
Travel to work=£146

AIBU to be upset that the only option may be leaving a well paid job because whilst we can just scrape by on DH salary with certainly can't afford for me to pay £450 to work :-(

How do people do it? I'm proud of my job

OP posts:
eminemmerdale · 06/02/2013 11:56

Is that before or after tax?

poppy1973 · 06/02/2013 11:57

Would it be cheaper option for you to share child care costs with another family ? or employ a part-time nanny/child minder ??

MegBusset · 06/02/2013 11:59

Can you look into cheaper childcare - childminder or au pair? Even if it means you just break even for now.

Original poster
CeceliaStrange · 06/02/2013 11:59

after tax, good salary! Unless you have kids in London.

Nannies cost more or the same at best.
I will look in childminders but need space for two in an area with shortages

OP posts:
Caladria · 06/02/2013 11:59

Sometimes I think there's a long-term calculation going on - i.e. that even if you're losing in the short term you'll be better off in the long term because of staying in work.

Not much help, I know.

rubyslippers · 06/02/2013 11:59

why are you working it out on just your salary?

childcare comes out of both our salaries

but the cost is massive

look at a nanny as it may be better value for 2 kids rather than nursery

Original poster
CeceliaStrange · 06/02/2013 11:59

Au pair not allowed are they for full time work?

OP posts:
Original poster
CeceliaStrange · 06/02/2013 12:00

ruby, I'm not, I'm working it out on family income; DH salary-£450=not enough to live on.

OP posts:
YorkshireDeb · 06/02/2013 12:01

It's insane isn't it! My childcare costs are a lot lower than that but so many people find it's cheaper to stay at home than to pay for childcare. Can't be good for the economy. X

EuroShagmore · 06/02/2013 12:01

You need to think about this in the long term. The sums might mean that it is costing you money to work now but you need to think beyond that, imo. If you were to quit your job, how easy would it be to get back into the work force? What pension rights would you lose? What would be the long term effect on your career? How long realistically are you going to have to bear two lots of childcare before one then both foes to school? And would you be happy as a SAHM?

rubyslippers · 06/02/2013 12:01

au pairs do a set number of hours and are not meant to do FT childcare

also i wouldn't give them the responsibility

i am looking at the au pair option for when my youngest goes to school

Trills · 06/02/2013 12:02

why are you working it out on just your salary?

Because that's where the choice lies - get salary and pay childcare, or don't get salary but also don't pay childcare.

Childcare is a joint cost but it makes sense when deciding whether to be a SAHP to balance the salary of that parent against the childcare costs.

Original poster
CeceliaStrange · 06/02/2013 12:02

euro I seethe long term issues, I agree however we just can't sustain 2 yrs of two pre-schoolers in nursery

OP posts:
HorraceTheOtter · 06/02/2013 12:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

rubyslippers · 06/02/2013 12:03

oh i see - misunderstood your intial post

It is a drag but i took a very, very long term view which was that once the kids were at school my career and earning potential would still be there

there has been times when i have nearly imploded with the stress of it but i can see the ligth at the end of the tunnel

Piecesofmyheart · 06/02/2013 12:03

Do you no longer qualify for child benefit ?
How long before your children start school ?

Tortoiseonthehalfshell · 06/02/2013 12:03

Unless there is a possibility for both parents to go part time and share care, which is what we did - worked out well because we both paid less tax as well. But I realise this presupposes two flexible careers and a willing DH which seems to be a hens teeth proposition.

rubyslippers · 06/02/2013 12:04

YY - i misunderstood the OP

there isn't an easy or right answer ...
it's very galling to be faced with this

GColdtimer · 06/02/2013 12:05

When will your funding kick in. How old are your dcs?

ceeveebee · 06/02/2013 12:05

How many hours of childcare do you need? And how old are your DCs?

A nanny may be cheaper depending on your hours
Are you using childcare vouchers to the max?
Can you and/or DH reduce to 4 days or do 5 days into 4?
Can one of you/DH stagger your working days to reduce hours of childcare needed?
And you will eventually get free 15 hours at least (if its still in place).

amck5700 · 06/02/2013 12:06

It's not just London, and not just now. 12 years ago we were paying £600 a month for a childminder for our son - that was using as little as possible depending on OH shifts. When we knew we were expecting No2 the figures just would add up - the Cm would give us a discount for 2nd child but mu OH only earned just over £1k a month as a nurse after tax etc. add travel/work incidentals on and it wasn't worth it. There was no Tax Credit etc back then either. He gave up full time work and looked after the kids. He got a part time job - all day Sunday and 2 evenings, got about £400 a month as he was below tax threashold so we were much better off.

CinnabarRed · 06/02/2013 12:07

A nanny to yourself will cost more, for sure. But how about a nanny share?

Viviennemary · 06/02/2013 12:07

Would work give you a year off without pay and that would leave you free to decide what would be the best option for you. But look round for alterntives. Shared nanny or childminder.

kitsmummy · 06/02/2013 12:07

It's ridiculous but fairly standard these days isn't it? That's why people often have about 4 years between children so they only end up paying one lot of childcare at a time.

Original poster
CeceliaStrange · 06/02/2013 12:08

dcs are 3 months and 2 (summer born)

not possible to go PT (teachers, school leadership)

OP posts: