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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be devastated my DP has admitted he likes 'small, pointly boobs'?

64 replies

lightsandshapes · 04/06/2011 14:16

I have large 34 GG breasts (and getting bigger - 5 months pregnant).

I feel unappreciated and almost feel like having an affair with someone who appreciates my body. I have tried to set up a 'date' night too, but so far he has refused everything I've suggested. Just feel like giving up on this relationship

OP posts:
Original poster
lightsandshapes · 04/06/2011 14:18

oops, i mean 'pointy' boobs

OP posts:
Yukana · 04/06/2011 14:19

Oh honey. :( How long have you been together? That sort of comment is not what you need, especially while pregnant.

Did he say it jokingly or seriously, in other words do you think he realised it would hurt your feelings? Not that it makes saying it any better, of course.

You should feel appreciated and loved whilst in a relationship. I really hope things get better for you and big MN hugs.

Salmotrutta · 04/06/2011 14:22

Oh dear - sounds like this is about more than the size of your boobs?

Do you think sitting him down and ahving a heart-to-heart will help? Or would he refuse to do that too?

MittzyTheMinx · 04/06/2011 14:23

Oh lovely, that's really crap and a difficult one to come round from.

It sounds a bit as if it is the tip of the ice burg from your OP, b ut can you explain how much he has hurt your feelings and see if he understands?

(( )) x

smartyparts · 04/06/2011 14:23

Gosh - how to make you feel crap about yourself!

Tell him you prefer big tree-trunk penises, assuming he doesn't have one!

TheMostBeautifulPoster · 04/06/2011 14:25

Lol. Am on phone. Think i just reported the tree trunk post in error!!

Was going to say ANY comment on appearance is doubly tough when pg

smartyparts · 04/06/2011 14:27

Eek - am I going to get banned now? Grin

Original poster
lightsandshapes · 04/06/2011 14:54

Yukana we've been together for 5 years. It sort of just slipped out. Feel so upset by everything. He's being a crap DP at the moment

OP posts:
CliffTumble · 04/06/2011 14:56

Has he been watching porn?

Original poster
lightsandshapes · 04/06/2011 14:58

cliff - no he never watches porn.

OP posts:
CliffTumble · 04/06/2011 15:00

I'd go with the tree trunk comment then. We can't all have what we want...

Sn0wflake · 04/06/2011 15:00

Git

worraliberty · 04/06/2011 15:06

What a naff thing to say to you when you're pregnant Shock

FWIW it obviously doesn't matter to him or he wouldn't have chosen you in the first place, but even so he needs a lesson in bloody tact and manners.

Crevix · 04/06/2011 15:12

I prefer small pointy boobs. 2 children, 2 years of feeding and 6 stone bigger than I should be means they will never be small and pointy again.

I also prefer large sturdy Penises. I could go out and get a large sturdy penis if I had the energy but I haven't. It is an option though.

worraliberty · 04/06/2011 15:14

I have small pointy boobs

Trouble is, at age 42 they're pointing downwards Hmm

EmmaBemma · 04/06/2011 15:15

I can only imagine how this conversation would have come about, but did your husband say he prefers small pointy bosoms to other boobular shapes and sizes, including yours? Or that he only likes small pointy bosoms? Or is it more that he is a fan of all the boobs, including those at either end of the spectrum.

EmmaBemma · 04/06/2011 15:16

sorry, just realised you said DP not DH. My mistake slaps wrist.

BumWiper · 04/06/2011 15:49

I think this comment has more to it than your ample boobs.Is this your first child?Maybe he is panicing about his impending fatherhood and projecting it by trying to make you feel bad about yourself.

You are more than breasts.

atswimtwolengths · 04/06/2011 15:53

Yes, she is more than breasts, but he is just a prick.

BumWiper · 04/06/2011 16:02

A little prick by the sounds of it Grin

TheOriginalFAB · 04/06/2011 16:13

He is a dick head for saying it but you are a bit silly for thinking you feel like having an affair to show him. Tell him you were hurt by what he said and how would he feel if you said you preferred X penises?

kiki22 · 04/06/2011 16:19

i'd say fine if you don't like them access denied :) or tell him that you'll keep them for your own enjoyment since he doesn't seem to like them :)

shirleyshortcut · 04/06/2011 16:35

so you are up the duff by this man, yet you feel like having an affair "to show him"

very mature

IloveJudgeJudy · 04/06/2011 16:41

I know how you're feeling. I once asked my DH, stupidly, did he prefer this or that, that being what I am. He said, this. I was devestated. As soon as I had asked the question I wished I hadn't, but he answered very quickly. He did make it up to me by being very nice for ages.

Did you ask your DP, or did he tell you? If he told you, then that's just nasty. I would sit down with him without any distractions, perhaps even in the car going somewhere as that seems to help sometimes, and ask him why he said that and how it made you feel. His answer may help you to go forward.

Original poster
lightsandshapes · 04/06/2011 17:42

IloveJudgeJudy thanks for this. Yes, I said something like, gosh my breasts suddenly feel heavy and in a girly way 'you don't like my boobs do you?' because I noticed he hardly ever touches them, followed with something like 'do you like big oobs'... somehow he came out (quickly too) with, 'I've never liked big boobs, I prefer small pointy ones'. So it was a similar situation to yours. It feels awful doesn't it.

shirley lovely turn of phrase you have there, but no it's not to 'show him' it's to get the attention I crave and some self-esteem and someone who actually seems to want to touch them!!! I never said I was mature -who is all the time. But I am very human and need physical affection like everyone else.

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